 TAH/BSO - A hard journey |
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TAH Journey
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My friends..first, I want to say a big and thunderous ovation for this site. I can not tell you how many times I came on here, just to wander and pray that someone asked the question I was thinking..and sure enough some one did..This board, these sweet sisters are amazing. I will forver be in your debt. However, I have a few things that I just have to say..a few words I have to speak, hoping that someone out there needs the answer.
On October 14,2003..I had my surgery..I made the decision the previous March..and kept my word. The pain was too much..the endo had taken my ability to "live" a normal life..so enough was enough...now on with the story.
IT is time for some honesty here my friends..no more, "it is all going to be fine..it is easy, you just need to rest"..no, it is one of the most difficult recoveries..emotions are all over the map..and the complications if received can be serious...I am not going to say it was easy..it still is not and next week will be 8 weeks.
On october 13 at 3pm I did the bowel prep..it took effect at 9pm that night..until about 12:00am..it is the absolute worst procedure you have to do..and that is the fact! I arrived at the hospital at 8am..and still the prep was working..I had to go right up until 9am..as they were taking me to the pre-op area...it is a nightmare. However, once in the pre-op area..they were busy little beavers there! Met the A -man..he is my hero! Told him NO puking..and sure enough I had none..doc there..she rocks! Asked me again.."are you sure, all out?"..I said "rip it out doc!"..she laughed and said.."okay, lets rock!"..got on the table..and that was that..Next thing I know..she is stroking my arm..told me it looked like Bagdad in there..I was a mess..endo everywhere..bladder, kidney's, even on the liver! Organs a nightmare..ovaries almost dead and uterus a mess..swollen and ugly..I knew it, but it somehow made me feel better that she confirmed it, you know? I was pretty much awake..groggy, but okay..no nausea at all..none! (make sure you insist that the a-man uses the meds..you have to ask!!!! so ask!!!!!!!!)..She said that my hubby and mom were worried, took her a long time..over 3-4 hours..I was a bit complicated..had to give me some blood..so if you have any worries about needing blood..give your own..I did not, as the risk was so low..however, she needed it..400cc..so I should of...She explained the pain pump...then I saw my DH..what a love I have with him, the look on his face..the relief..and that of my mommy..I am blessed. The only thing I remember from that is asking if my dog went to the bathroom!!!
In my room, about 5pm I was up..and they fed me..liquids..yep, no food the first night..and I was starving..but understood..catheter does NOT hurt..and if it does, tell them, okay? IT should not hurt..it goes right into your bladder, and you do not have to think about going..it goes for you..and all is okay!Now the nightmare.....The pain pump, DID not work..kept beeping all night, nurses slow and not responding..I did nothing..mistake! She gave me shot after shot..and nothing..next morning, around 6am I went off!!! Then my doc came in..she went off too..seems they never reset the darned thing..and I was flying solo most of the night..pain management is essential to your recovery..ask for it, use it and do not be afraid of it..it is the only way your body will be able to rest..trust me! The doc filed a complaint with the nursing supervisor..the hospital..and she promptly pulled me off the pump..and gave me percs..wow, what a difference..needed them every 4-5 hours, and I told them, and they responded! Catheter out..and went on my own..burns a bit..a bit of blood in the plastic cup..yep, you have to pee in a container for a day or two..that way they can judge output..important, so do it..!!!!
Got up that day..walking okay..if pain is kept under control..and took a shower on my own..now that was amazing..and felt wonderful..nurse stood right there..a little dizzy, but no pain and the warm water felt good!!!! Just aim is a bit high..do not get those stitches wet! (they nurse freak out! docs do not though)..Doc told me for every 10 minutes up, an hour rest..and she was and still is right! But walking is essential..so very important, do it..you will be okay!
Eating..they give you a normal diet the next day..and you have to eat!!!! I hesitated..but, once I did, I felt 50% better..your body needs food..so eat..
Each day, you feel better..you do..doc saw me every day..and then applied the HRT patch..that is what made me feel 100% better..sweats gone, headaches down..and more energy. Listen up..keep the visits and phone calls to your immediate family..too many, and you get exhausted...I did this, and it made the world of difference. Your real friends will understand..I did not see peeps until 2 weeks after I got home..I needed the time..my husband was enough..and even he had a hard time seeing me so down and ill..it is hard on them..remember that!
When I got home..the third day..doc prescribed Ambien for sleeping Thank God! That medicine is a God send..it has and does help sleeping and it is safe..take all the help you can in sleeping..and if you can not sleep, tell your doc..mine was and is wonderful..she told me that rest, sleep, nutrition and love will get me through..and it still is..8 weeks later.
On the Friday I was home, I developed an awful bacterial infection..vagina..the NP have me Amoxicillin 500mg and Diflucan..well..seems the penicillin and I do not get along it stripped me of all my good bacteria..yep for 6 weeks I had awful colitis and diarrhea..not until I took acidophillus did things harden up a bit..pain, increased..I have fluid in the cul de sac area..(where the uterus was)..seems I am a mess inside..I can not take any antibiotics unless absolutely necessary now..I did not have any prior knowledge of my allergic reation..but I do now!..I have to take this acidophilus for a while..it is expensive, but worth it!!!
I am tired, moderate pain still after 8 weeks..and still suffering from colitis..eating is tough..and still on some pain meds and sleeping meds..This surgery wiped me out! I can not work, nor is the doc saying I can..no way, not now. My DH is amazing..and most of my family is supportive..friends, they do not understand why I am not rushing out Christmas shopping, as I should be "fine" by now..to hell with them, I do not have time..my body is angry..and it is letting me know it..
What I am trying to say..is that no matter what you read on this site, each one of us is different..we react differently to meds, surgery, stresses..You are not abonormal if something is taking longer than others did..and too be honest, I find most of the "sunshine" talk on here not true..I have met now, many sisters...and most have had a rough go of things..it is a shock to the body..major surgery, and complications do arise..be prepared for them..and have the support system that you need BEFORE you go into surgery..I have seen my doc 5 times since the surgery..had CATSCANS..blood work, stool samples..bla, bla, gone to a urologist, had a cystoscopy done..put on Detrol LA (miracle drug)..and still not recovered fully..I do not know why, most docs are thinking that the endo was so extensive and the organs left are just swelling and angry..and maybe they are..but starting in Jan I start all over again with doc appts..enough to cover the calender...
The surgery itself goes well..it does..but, you must be active in your recovery..with the A-man, the docs, the nurses..and in the end yourself..your family will take their cues from you..tell them what you need..if it is silence, then so be it..some friends are still mad at me for not calling them..they will get over it..most are very understanding..and sent e-mails and simply told my DH, give her our love..and I received it..stronger than if they were with me.
What am trying to say..let your body tell you what it needs..the body has a voice..and sometimes, as with me, it says, " I am tired, and sore and in pain, and something is wrong.."..and for the past 8 weeks, I have listened..mind, body, and spirit..working together is the only way, I will heal..and for the first time I am hearing that loud and clear..and have decided that I need to listen!
Take care and what ever you decide to do, do it with all those dimensions in mind..God bless...
love,
Tuesday
Related Titles
TAH Journey
My journey to and from my TAH
TAH - My Journey
TAH - The Journey
TLH/BSO - My journey
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