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birdbrains
(12/22/99 10 07 am)
Le Laura fou de Princesse sans sa tuyauterie
Sounds good doesn't it.... This is my story... Years ago (18 to be exact) Princess Laura was pregnant with Crown Prince Geoffrey... All was well, until the car she was in was rear-ended which caused undue stress on the ligaments supporting the unborn Prince... Two months and 40 hours later,
Prince Geoffrey was born, via C-section... The reigning Duke-tor, Max says "those ovaries look rather crappy, lets keep an eye on them" oh, and youv'e torn the ligaments supporting the uterus, so when you have another heir, you'll need to be followed closely to assure there are no problems... move forward 10 years past several ruptured cysts/ultrasounds and increasing episodes of incontinence, and the Lord of Ladies Loins announces, "Hmm, maybe the reason your sex life is so miserable/painful is a combination of the cystic ovaries and the fact that you vital organs are trying to exit via your
vaginal orifice..Why don't we do a Hysterectomy.." After much thought, Laura
decided, this was not an option, and the easiest thing to do was exercise, and give up sex...(not a difficult thing to do since the court jester had long since left.)... Forward to 1998, incontinence is a way of life, pain a persistant occupant of the every 21 day fiascos called "periods", and since investing in the women's personal care business seemed like a lousy choice, she went to see the High Priest of Hormones, and yet another ultrasonographer by the name of Sam (short for Samantha) Only this time it was discovered, in addition to the malfunctioning plumbing, there were tumors lurking in the walls of the "holy shrine", and the blood supplies to the rest of princess Laura were
becoming more and more depleted.... The High Priest of Hormones decreed that "holy herbs" would be administered, for a specified time frame, to try and cleanse the "Holy Shrine" of it's impurities... Failing this, he would need her to report to the castle for reconstruction of the plumbing into and surrounding the "shrine" since excavation, or purging was not an option, due to the location of the cryptic "tumors"... Many months, and several pints of blood later, the pleas were heard by the Priest who decided to transport her to the Land of Hyster for a visit to the sterile, tiled, tabernacle of healing.... and remove the offending body parts with the magical knives... 2 and 1/2 hours later, she emerged into the house of healing minus 2 ovaries (that looked very
much like deep sea sponges), 2 fallopian tubes (along with the attached scar tissue), 1 VERY LARGE uterus (with attached cervix) and he had added the "patch of perpetual estrogen" to her left hip and a strange conduit into her bladder.... The very next day (probably because of extensive complaining on her part) the strange conduit was removed, and she was allowed to wander
the castle, as long as a handmaid was present... Queen Martha, the new Princess's mother, picked her up at the castle the very next day, and in spite of the scare stories from the harpies, she returned to her kingdom, much sorer, but also quite relieved that horrors did not await her every few weeks... 2 weeks later, due to EXTREME boredom, she returned to work (part time)
suffering only from a slight bladder infection (from the ignoble conduit). Four
weeks later, after a blessing from the High Priest, Princess Laura returned full-time to work... And it was good.
Laura (TAH/BSO 10/16/99)
Related Titles
Laparoscopic Assisted Vaginal Hysterectomy- My LAVH/BSO Story - long story
My Story: Uterine Cancer - Katerskater's Story
tah /bso/hernia repair - my story, THE HOLE STORY)
My Story: Ovarian Cancer - Maria951's Story
My Story: Cervical Cancer- jenny1119's Story
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