Sex - Libido and Sexual Activities After Hysterectomy |
From the Post-Op Hysterectomy Articles List |
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Ask A Doctor
My libido is going nuts. I am 3 weeks post op from my hysterectomy and I have a libido that will not stop. What causes this and what are my choices?
It's very common for libido to surge in the early weeks after our surgery due to changes in the balance of hormones in the body. However, it's equally common for sex drive to take a nose dive right around the time we're getting our doctor's OK for intercourse.
This is because whatever hormones the body had stored prior to the surgery have been depleted. At that point, our libido is at the mercy of whatever HRT we are using; or, for those of us who kept our ovaries, how well they are working, since their blood supply is compromised when the uterus is removed.
So, for those of us who had our ovaries removed, during those first six weeks the main objective of hormone replacement therapy is to try to keep the hot flashes and night sweats at bay so we can get some sleep and let our bodies heal. Then, after the post op fluctuations have abated, we can turn our attention to adjusting our HRT to make sure we still have a healthy libido.
In addition, it's worth noting that because of both hormonal factors and emotional issues associated with the surgery, intercourse may not be all we hope it to be that *first time* after the doctor gives the 'OK'. Vaginal dryness can cause discomfort and may require the use of either a good lubricant, such as Astroglide or KY Silk-e, or some vaginal estrogen to help us produce our own lubricant the way we did prior to the surgery, or both.
For those who had TVH's or LAVH's and/or A&P repairs, there can still be some swelling and tenderness even as far as six weeks post op, so we need to take things slowly and gently until we see whether penetration will be comfortable or not.
Also, having this surgery can sometimes bring up all kinds of difficult emotions to the surface, both in us and in our partners, and that can result in some tension around sex, especially the first few times.
Finally, for those who had vaginal surgeries, sometimes nerves are cut during the surgery and it can take time for them to regenerate (which they usually can), so sensation may initially not be too great but may gradually improve as time passes and the injured tissues heal.
So, try not to have unrealistic expectations of how intercourse will feel the first time after the surgery. Some women find it feels terrific right away (especially those for whom sex was very painful before their surgery), while others may require some time. Just don't be disappointed if it isn't everything you expect... it can get better as time passes and with 'practice'
If your doctor has not been crystal clear about what is allowed and not allowed during the early post op period, please don't hesitate to ask him or her. For example, many if not most doctors will say no to oral sex because of the possibility of bacteria from the mouth entering the vagina and causing infection. Occasionally, though, doctors have said it's OK if mouthwash is used right beforehand, or it's OK if a dental dam is used. ASK. Yes, you might feel embarassed, but they have heard it all before, many times.
For those whose partners have made them feel guilty for "depriving" them, please don't give in. In the first place, anyone who would encourage their partner to disobey their doctor's orders and risk infection or injury for the sake of a few moments of gratification is not being a caring, supportive partner.
Secondly, if their need is so *dire* they can always "take matters into their own hands" so to speak. And finally, sexual relations are supposed to be an expression of love and caring undertaken by mutual consent. Guilt has no place in that whatsoever. Please believe that your partner will not explode if you do not have intercourse before your doctor gives the okay. And as some have said previously, waiting can make it all the more enjoyable when it does happen.
It is understandable that the temptation is very great during those early weeks. As you've heard in some of the preceding examples, whatever pleasure you might get from going against your doctor's instructions is not worth the risks you could be taking.
You and your partner have the rest of your lives to enjoy each other. Make sure you get a healthy start on that by following your doctor's orders.
This content was written by staff of HysterSisters.com by non-medical professionals based on discussions, resources and input from other patients for the purpose of patient-to-patient support.
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Recommended for Hysterectomy Recovery
The HysterSisters Store has gathered products made specifically for your recovery from surgery. Here are the best sellers we can recommend to help you:
- The Great Binder Set - We have made it very easy for you and combined the two best binders and the Silky Sac into a great set to save you money! Our favorite is the Perfect Pocket binder with cold/hot packs!
- Deluxe Hyst Prep Set - As you plan, we've gathered the best products into one set for special pricing.
- Post-Op Panty - These great panties speed recovery, and reduces scarring. They contain a medical-grade silicone panel over incision to reduce scar's apperance while they provide support to weakened muscles and tissues from surgery. Excellent!
- Softest Bra Ever - When you want to wear something, but feel nothing. This is the softest bra ever, in microfiber with no hardware or tags to chafe or dig! The comfort-ribbed underband stays in place gently, so it is perfect for sleeping and lounging.
- HysterSisters Accessory Kit - Are you a HysterSisters fan? This set has a fun collection of HysterSisters items.
- Very Private Moisture - Once your doctor gives you the green light for intimacy, this is the stuff! This is a best selling product with a high rate of permanent, satisfied, repeat customers! Relieves vaginal dryness instantly, protects tissue & enhances intimacy.
"Buy it for the problem, use it for the pleasure."
Brad Cohen, M.D. 2477 Route 516 Suite 103 Old Bridge NJ 08857 732-679-6900 |
Jack Ayoub, M.D. 44035 Riverside Parkway Suite 435 Leesburg VA 20176 703.858.5599 |
Tamer Seckin, M.D. 872 FIFTH AVE NEW YORK NY 10065 2129881444 |
Robert Furr, M.D. Women's Surgery Center 1604 Gunbarrel Road Chattanooga TN 37421 4238996511 |
Terry Grogg, M.D. 4461 S Broadway Suite 200 Suite 200 Grove City OH 43123 614-875-0444 |
Kym Boyman, M.D. 1775 Williston Rd., Ste. 110 South Burlington VT 05403 802-735-1252 |
Ruslana Kadze, M.D. 5525 Etiwanda Avenue Suite 228 Tarzana (Los Angeles) CA 91356 818-343-1717 |
Wilfredo R. Ramos, M.D. 5301 F Street, Suite 210 Sacramento CA 95819 (916) 453-3440 |
Amie Napier, M.D. Medical City Hospital 7777 Forest Lane Suite A331 Dallas TX 75230 9725667760 |
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