 The New Year in the Land of Hyster |
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The New Year in the Land of Hyster
Once upon a time in the Land of Hyster, the King looked at the calendar on the wall of his throne room and noticed the date. December 31, 1998. "Wow!" he muttered to himself. "The year has flown by and we've forgotten to celebrate. Hurridly running to his messengers, he shouted out his orders and the castle was all at once in a bustle of activity.
The maids began to wax and shine the floors. The butlers (yes, the castle had many butlers to help with the many tasks of butlering) all sorted the silver and set the banquet table. The wine cellar's counters grab the bottles of the best champange and attached the notes as the king instructed. Soon, the decorators took the bottles, tossed them into golden baskets and tied beautiful glittery ribbons along the edge in such a way that would have made even Martha Stewart impressed. The orchestra members were called in for practice while the florist delivered gardenias and lilies for the table bouquets. Tripping over each other in the huge rooms, the servants hurried up and down, in and out as they readied the castle for the biggest party of the year.
Running out of the castle with the baskets in the rear end of the pickup, Billy Bob's Messenger service was in full swing. Delivering the baskets of champagne to each Hyster Sister within the Land of Hyster's limits, he managed to make great time with such speed that even Santa was thinking about hiring him to guide the sleigh next year.
Each sister received her basket of goodies along with this attached note:
You are invited to the castle
December 31, 1998
Come and toast the new year together with hugs and giggles.
And it was signed:
The King of the Land of Hyster
The activity in the castle continued at break neck speed which was only second to the speed that the Hyster Sisters got into gear. Digging furiously into their closets for the gown the King had sent earlier in the year for the other party, each sister found the gown, discovered that is still fit perfectly and made mad dashes to the hair dressers. Long soaks in the bathtub followed by leg shaving, underarm shaving, pedicures and manicures were all fit into the afternoon of each Hyster Sister. As the sun set and the stars filled the sky, each sister was dressed and looking like a million dollars. Soon, the night air was filled with sweet smelling perfumes and the sounds of laughter as the Hyster Sisters made their way to the castle to celebrate the new year.
The castle looked lovely with the candles, the silverware and the bouquets of flowers, but the sisters all knew that the King was indeed a special King when they noticed a special additional seating arrangement. Near the center of the room, so nothing would be missed, a pile of the loveliest, softest pillows were arranged. Princess Joan and Princess Sheri, the newest of the punctured princesses, were carried in and lovingly placed upon the pillows by the sweetest handmaidens in the Land. They were the center of attention as the other sisters came by to get and give hugs.
Just when the evening was at it funnest and the laughter and the hugging was at its best, the King stepped up to the microphone and cleared his throat.
"Dear Hyster Sisters," he began. "Tonight is a special night. Together we meet to welcome the changing of the calendars. Together we meet to greet a new year. But most important of all....we stand together facing a fresh start. The new year is a glorious blank slate of possibilities. My desire for each of you is to live to your potential, be healthy and whole, and to enjoy the relationships that are around you to the fullest. I wanted to see all your faces tonight and remind you to smile at your future."
WIth great applause, the King stepped down and was surrounded by the sisters whom he loved so much. Hugging, and more hugging, filled the room to the furthest corners as the clock struck twelve times and then confetti filled the air. Raising their glasses to each other and holding each other close, they watched as the time changed, the date changed, the year changed.
And they smiled at their future.
And the Hyster Sisters lived happily ever after and were hormonally balanced forever.
The end.
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-- January NewsletterPost Hysterectomy Fitness and Health is the theme of our January, 2012 newsletter at HysterSisters.com. Visit this link [ More]...
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