I miss Hystersisters! This is the first I've been on all day and my DH is exhausted and wants to go to sleep, so my time is limited tonight... I will have so many journals to catch up on tomorrow; it's something to look forward to. I fear that tomorrow will be an in-bed-all-day day (too much afternoon activity). Overall, my pain has been much less again today. My body is finally healing from those two busy days. I rested all morning and took an early afternoon nap.

This afternoon I searched my wardrobe for clothes to take during our 3 1/2 weeks away. My summer clothes don't fit! My belly is so swollen that none of my cute shorts or little skirts span around it... I have the figure of a 5 months pregnant woman, except that I'm not pregnant. And the last thing I want is someone congratulating me on my pregnancy! To compound things, I'm always holding my pelvis because it's sore, just as a pregnant woman would. Anyhow, I'm handling it better than expected, since I have a borderline anorexia complex.

I don't starve myself the way I did in my twenties, but I do still have a tendency to get obsessive about what I eat. Now, my obsession is more about eating healthy foods and exercising, and I think it's never a bad idea to try to be healthy, so at least the manifestation of my obsession is not dangerous. But I realize that I had this surgery and I knew in advance from all of the hystersisters that my waist would be compromised for awhile. I have three long pretty skirts that are kind of wrap aroundy (expandable waistlines). I also have two pairs of "fat jeans", one pair of cargo pants, and one pair of shorts that fit, so I will be able to manage. After trying on several articles of clothing, however, my abdomen started really hurting. It's amazing to me how performing a simple task like dressing has become a major exercise.

I also went today to get my hair cut and colored. That's always a 3 hour event. I made the hair appointment two months ago, before I even knew I was having surgery, and I kept it because having pretty hair makes me feel good and I want it to look nice for our trip, especially given the limited clothing situation. It's the one thing I splurge on. I will shop in thrift stores, and am an insatiable bargain hunter, but when it comes to my hair I'm willing to pay extra. I go to an Aveda salon that uses all natural products and where the atmosphere is comfortable and inviting. I was born a blonde, but need a little help now to stay one .

I am nervous that tomorrow I will be incapacitated again because of the salon visit and the trying on of clothing. I don't have time for pain since we are leaving Saturday. My plan is to do a tiny bit of packing each day, so tomorrow is important. Today was my wardrobe, tomorrow is babyE's toys & clothes. My DH surprised me tonight by doing three loads of laundry. Our washer and dryer are in the basement, so he has been doing the washing and drying and then carrying the clothes upstairs for me to fold. I think I'm a little crazy, because I really like folding clothes... especially all those cute little baby girl clothes .

Thursday I see Dr. Expert and am keeping my fingers crossed that I won't need a suture in my vaginal cuff. There has not been bright red blood since early last week, but I still have that disgusting brown discharge. I wonder how long that will remain. I can't wait to wear pretty underwear again with no protection!

~ Clementine