And I'm starting to feel sort of normal again! First time I've gotten on the computer and not taken a nap. I tried to nap, but just wouldn't sleep!

The surgery wasn't bad. The pain never got above a 5 on a 1-10 scale. I was expecting much worse, bust glad I didn't have it! My incisions are sore, but not horrible. It's been tough to take it easy with three little boys at home but I am. Going to church and then out to lunch yesterday wore me out...I slept for over 2 hours afterwards.

I still have been nursing the baby, my supply has been great. I pumped in the hospital and the nurses stored the milk in the staff freezer. I have been using my Boppy pillow a lot more now, that has helped with the pressure of the baby on my belly.

Feeling good but not stellar yet.

After many months of waiting, my surgery day is finally here. I've had many surgeries but I think I may be more nervous of this one than any other. This isn't even my biggest surgery. I think that the finality of the surgery is what unsettles me. I know our family is complete but that is such a big step to affirming that. Can't wait to get to the recovery part of this!

5.8 earthquake today around 2:30. Everyone's fine, but the boys and I were quite scared. Monkey #3 slept through the whole thing. Monkeys 1 and 2 stuck to me like glue for a while after and I was shaking for a good 20 minutes. Had a hard time dialing the phone. Everything is okay now though!

This did nothing for my pre-op nerves. Uhg.

I can't believe it started already...11 days until surgery and I'm what if-ing! I thought for sure I'd get under a week until surgery when it started. Grrrr.

Hoping that with oldest son starting school next week, getting ready for visit from the in-laws, and getting ready for my Dad and his wife will keep the cancerhead at bay. Because for some reason three busy kids isn't doing it!

Seems like that day is fast approaching...and yet so far away. I'm starting to get nervous about the recovery. That has always been one of the worst parts of surgery for me. I don't like the way I feel when I wake up and I don't like being in pain. And I worry about how the boys will do with me being out of commission for a while. So much for them to deal with. We've been talking about the surgery with them so they should be prepared to be gentle and helpful with mom. I think I just find things to worry about!

I just finished my last period ever. Pretty excited about that! I'll never have to worry about bleeding through anything and I can get myself a whole new underwear wardrobe! I think that will be my first shopping trip when I feel up to it post-op. I'm looking forward to treating myself to that!

I've been waiting a long 20 months to have this hysterectomy done. The date is set for August 30th, seven weeks from today.

I found out in September 21, 2009 that I had cervical cancer (AIS). I was so shocked to hear this as the cervical biopsy was done on a cyst as a "just in case" measure. I was training for a triathlon and wanted more than anything to be able to finish my training and then deal with cancer (for the second time). My gyn-onc completely understood and felt it was acceptable to wait until my tri in October to proceed with the conization. The cone was done in November and margins were clear. I was ready to have the hysterectomy before Christmas with late January being the latest I would be willing to wait but my gyn-onc forced me to wait until February 11, 2010 to have the hysterectomy.

I thank God that my gyn-onc made me wait! Two weeks before surgery I found out my uterus was in use! A total shock as we had been trying on and off for 8 years to conceive and had a miscarriage in 2008. We did adopt 2 wonderful boys from Korea and were thrilled to share the news with them. I knew from the moment I learned I was pregnant that nothing would happen to the baby. I knew in my heart that God would not allow me to prepare for the hysterectomy, just to allow me to get pregnant, and then take that away. The baby was born October 2010, the only time I've ever been happy about something my uterus did!

So here I am now with 3 boys (6 years, 4 years, and 9 months) and I am finally getting this taken care of. On one hand, I am looking forward to getting rid of my uterus...it's cause me much physical pain and heartbreak over the years and chucking it out will reduce the chance of a recurrence greatly. On the other hand, I am dreading surgery and recovering with three kids at home. No matter what, it will be nice to be one the other side in 7 weeks.