Really scared about how my life will change

I keep having cysts pop up on my ovaries. One time it was cancerous, another time they weren't, then they came back again. I still need a biopsy to see what they are this time but the hormone treatments only seem to keep them away for so long.

The doctors now want to remove EVERYTHING because it seems like it could risk spreading and it's not worth it to risk it. I have spoken to many doctors about this and they all recommended I have everything removed. I'm only 21 and I'm very scared at what's going to happen to me.

I LOVE sex and I get along with my BF so well. This may get a little graphic but from other posts I see on here it's accepted. I love how wet I get down there with him and how ***** I am all the time with him. The sex is amazing and I don't want any of this to change. I was reading about post-op hormone treatments but I have mixed feelings. Many women have said even with treatments their sexual desire is 0 and they barely even feel like having sex or what it even used to be like. They are also constantly dry down there and need to use lube every time they have sex. I'm only 21 and I don't want to use lube everytime to have spontaneous sex! My BF is going to have a hard time dealing with it as his age since we're both so young and this isn't really expected.

I'm just nervous I won't feel like my usual, sexual self. It is really scaring me. Can anyone here give me advice on what hormones they use to maintain vaginal wetness, especially enough to have sex with like before? I did want to have kids but I'd rather be healthy. I still want to be like a normal girl who can have sex and still become ***** without the aids of lube or anything like that.

Anyone here on estrogen replacement? I heard there are special rings you can insert into your vagina. Are these effective? I just don't know anything yet and I'd like to know a bit more so I can ask my doctor the right questions.

Thank you girls!

I am on bio identical hormone cream that I apply to my arm 2x a day and a vaginal cream 3xs a week. I am hoping the vaginal cream can be replaced or eliminated totally, but not pushing it yet.
I was cleared for sex last week and it is great. My husband is very gentle (for now). I am 48 and had a very active and spontaneous sex life before this. I am not willing to give that up so I have purchased lots of good lube for the house, and am looking for something I can carry in my pocketbook for the other times.
At your age I would be most concerned about health, but that being said I was given a cancer diagnoses and was worried about sex also. Everyone is different, but i did a lot of research on hormone replacement,i am trying to be open to a new me. I am very happy I found a good Dr for the BHRT, and I think that is the key. Good luck!

At 21, you seem pretty young to me to have a hysterectomy. So, you said that some of your cysts are cancerous and some are not? You can also get a second opinion on your condition. Have you talked to a gyn onc?

Regarding lubrication, it can be necessary depending on your personal situation. I had a TAH BSO, am on ERT, and I do have to use lubrication. It is a source of frustration for me but we have learned to deal with it.

Good luck to you

(((Hugs)))

{{{hugs}}} I felt the same way you do about sex. My doctor and many many many women have also reassured me that if you had a great sex life before hand chances are very good that you'll maintain that sex life after surgery. Do extensive research on what surgery is being done, and how everything is put back together. Most important of all is listening to the doctor's instructions!! I cannot emphasize this enough! nothing would be worse than going through all that surgery only to go right back in weeks later for more surgery. Bring the BF along for some appointments so he can fully understand how important this is.

Does anyone have any luck with not needing any additional lube at all or is this pretty much guaranteed?

There are no guarantees. You may need some at one time but not the next. No woman knows how her body is going to respond to the surgery. Even if you were perfectly healthy there is still no guarantee from one time to the next time.

Fas - I know you mentioned "all the docs" but I urge you to go to a specialist if you can at all afford or find one. You mention you've had it cancerous once, then again and not cancerous and there are amazing things out there to manage some cysts. You have a lot of worries, which are of course very natural and though I've hit a wall often in getting mine set up for my age (28) - I couldn't even imagine at 21 doing so, especially before children. It's easy to want to be out of pain and I understand that completely (I actually am a candidate for spinal surgery but refuse to do so because of the risks, so I choose injections a couple times a year.) I'm not sure what the docs would risk spreading if you don't have proof these cysts are cancerous.

I would more than encourage but strongly urge finding a specialist in treatment and formation of cysts. I'm by no means a doctor in any sense of the word and what you mentioned health wise is very little, but depending on the types of cancerous cells, and the fact that you had some that were and some that weren't later, I'd be concerned that it's only manifesting there and there are other issues at play (the reason I mention this is because I've had a friend who had cancer and thought it was ovarian when it turned out the cells were originating in another part of the body completely missed). Since you haven't had a recurrence in another set, I'd be hesitant to go through with a hysterectomy until everything else was checked out. It could possibly be the only time it was cancerous and was cleanly removed so the next times would not be. I'd suggest also talking with an oncologist outside of that. You mention you do want children and while it seems so far away, not checking every avenue possible to reproduce later (such as the extreme costs of adoption and surrogacy), there might be something, somewhere that can prolong this so that you can both be sure of your sexual drive and ability and have children some day. Another option to consider especially is if your eggs can be stored. Again, seems like so far away but you may find that 5-10 years from now, you'll wish you had.

If you've done all this though and are completely sure, 100% then I certainly hope and wish you good luck.

Mine is scheduled for May 30th, so I'm not able to help at all on sex drive but my issues make me have none anyway. I'm actually hoping to GET a sex drive (lube or not ) because all the pain will be gone, and no 2 week periods!