TAH Feeling Numb Post Op

Evening ladies,

So a little about me, ever since I was 12 I remember having painful and irregular periods, the pain got so bad that my mother had to take me out of school for 2 days utmost. Since 2004 I was on several treatments (pills and injections). I got pregnant but unfortunately i miscarriage. In 2009 (after my 2nd miscarriage) I was told that I have endimeriosis and this is what is causing all my paint and that I would most likely not be able to have a baby, and if I did that the pain would go away.

In March 2009 I had my first Laparoscopy and in November the same year my 2nd (stage 2), and seen by a specialist. In January 2010 my beautiful daughter was born and for a couple of months it seemed to go well, and then it all started again, on and off treatments. Each pill had it's own set of ups but more downs, this one made gave me depression, this one made me aggro and so forth. Last year my Gynea suggested that I try the Mirena - and guess what 7 months later we had to remove it as it only made things worse, and giving me migraines which sent me to hospital. The Gynea deliberated and finally said that there is no more treatment options for me and that we had to discuss having another baby.

My husband said no, he was afraid of having another miscarriage and my mental state did not make it any better as I was having so many ups and downs that the Gynea did not even know what to do, one minute I'd be fine and the next I'd be crying my eyes out for nothing or biting his head off.

After a long discussion and a broken heart I agreed to the operation, a date was set - 1 week. During this week I did not have much time to go through the mental phases of what is exactly going to happen and by the time it was op day, I did not know what to do. My op was scheduled for 18:30 and I thought this would be enough time, when 17:00 came I was told my surgery had been moved. In the waiting room of the theater it hit my like a wreaking ball and the tears started flowing. In my state they put the drip and immediately had me sedated.

Now I am 4 days post op and feeling numb to the fact that I can no longer have any children. Is this feeling normal, will I ever be able to look my husband in the eye? My best friend had a baby on Monday and I can't even look at her without feeling like my heart is tearing into a million pieces.

What am I to do?

Mkruger there are many emotions you will be going thru in the coming weeks an months. You need to focus on getting yourself better. resting and taking care of you. Your husband sounds like he loves you very much and wanted to protect you from any future pain. Men sometimes it can be hard when they are not in control and this way he knew you are most important not another baby.
Take each day one at a time. Get yourself strong and healthy physically and mentally. Love your Husband, your daughter and most of all yourself. And maybe in a year from now adding to your family may be something you and your Husband can discuss. and if not remember it takes 2 to make a baby he has a say as well Best of Luck