Need sex advise fron any one who had anterior AND posterior repairs with TVH

Thank you for the input ladies, I appreciate it!

I had the anterior, posterior, perineoplasty, labiaplasty, plus the hyst with removal of one ovary, we have done it 3 times since we got the ok last week, first time I was so tense and nervous that although it hurt a bit it was ok but I didn't have a "O" second time still hurt some but I knew what to expect so I was more relaxed and that time things went good. Last night it hurt more than the other times but I think it was the position I was in, I did climax but had soreness after on the outside where its more tight, had to even take a tylenol, was still a bit sore this morning but I think its ok cause I tried a dialator and accually it hurt less than before, so I'm thinking things are stretching out ok but also there will be some spasms from the muscles stretching more.

One issue we are having is my husband says he feels like there is something poking at him in there, I know I still have stitches and the doc said they can take anywhere from 6 to 18 weeks to disolve completely. So is anyone else's honey feeling something poking him, cause I feel pretty bad about it, don't want the man to get fearful of my new parts, LOL!

Liz, hubby says he can definately feel the stitches but not poking him (yet lol). I do have a stitch poking straight out from the perineoplasty area (straight out like a needle) but I havent got the nerve up to tug at it a little to see if it will come out. Everyone keeps mentioning dialators and Im wondering with my "ring" that the doctor is so concerned about why he didnt offer dilators as a option or as an aid to getting it stretched out. I think if we havent had any success at getting that ring taken care of in the next couple weeks I may ask him about that at my appt on the 18th. Glad things are going well in that department for you guys, I know it was a huge worry for alot of us

Hi (((ladies)))
I had a rectocele repair along with a bladder sling with my TVH. The first time we were intimate I had a little bit of bleeding and we found there were several very strong stitches ( the knots were actually exposed) and they actually drew blood from my poor dh. I had to go in and have them clipped. My dr told me he has seen that kind as long as 12 months later and still not totally dissolved. They were like fishing line. I think that kind is used for some of the repairs. If it's not too you may not need to have them clipped, but mine were too large, it might have taken a long time.

Sex made me very sore at first. I had a little discomfort vaginally but mostly I felt tenderness in my abdomen. I had to wait several days before I was ready to try again. Even though incisions are healed the tissue surrounding them can take time to heal. With time everything improved and ended up being just fine. I think it's very natural for it to take a little time to get back to normal so try not to worry.

I didn't have the tightness you are having kcinkc, but have read where many members have dealt with it and the answer is to keep at it and that it's very important to continue having sex and stretching that tissue. I agree that the vaginal estrogen is often very helpful.

I wish all of you well and hope this area continues to improve. Keep us posted on your progress, it's a topic that is of concern to most of us.
Rita

KC, my doc is the one that told me to use "dialators" but his idea of dialators was to take a tapered candle and cut it in half and with that you have 4 sizes, I didn't use the candle idea but I think its a very cheap alternative to the dialators with the same result. I just started using the toy I had and even though it was sore a bit it was fine and I want this taken care of as soon as possible so I just continue to use that so that it will eventually be pain free. lol, my doc thought I would have to start with the candles but he doesn't know just how determined I am. I guess as for the poking him, its more like you said he feels the stitches and they rub on him.

Rita thanks for your info it's good to know things get better and yes my doc said my stitches can take a long time to desolve, I have felt one that seems to be very thick. If it doesn't come out by week 12 I am gonna be giving him a call back. He did remove all the other ones on the outside cause they were the ones causeing me pain.

Candles? Im with you lol, I dont think I'd be using candles lol. Hubby mentioned maybe trying a toy to help too (poor thing is getting traumatized by feeling like hes hurting me). The second time wasnt as painful so hopefully it wont be a terribly long process getting that area stretched out. I lost some stitches after the first time but not after the second, I think hubby will be glad to see those go lol

Rita..thanks for the info, its always helpful to hear from people who are further down the road in recovery too

TMI alert: Had my six week check up yesterday. Everything that was refusing to heal is finally almost completely healed. The tight "ring" that was causing problems sexually is slowly getting better,it is uncomfortable in the beginning but lasts less every time it seems. The Doc says the whole "angle" of the canal was changed with the repairs so we are still trying figure the most comfortable ways to deal with that until everything is completly back to normal(such as perineum not being sore etc). Even with all the changes I have to say the big O comes much easier now..not sure why but Im not complaining. Also found a lube I would HIGHLY recommend called PUR for women

Thank you for all the info! I am four weeks post op today with all the same repairs. I can tell that sex will be sort of an adventure for awhile. Glad to know it will get better with time. It's a little scary to contemplate right now....

CANDLES??!!!!??? Are you kidding me? How unsanitary is that?
The device my doc gave me was a stainless steel conical thing...a medical device, capable of being thoroughly santized between borrowers.
Sometimes you have to wonder... would these guys would suggest that to their wife?

	Quote:
Originally Posted by Becca50 CANDLES??!!!!??? Are you kidding me? How unsanitary is that? The device my doc gave me was a stainless steel conical thing...a medical device, capable of being thoroughly santized between borrowers. Sometimes you have to wonder... would these guys would suggest that to their wife?

LOL!!! I am assuming he figured I would be using new candles and throwing them out after. Actually I envy his wife, this doc is absolutely wonderful and very caring and attentive, sometimes I have waited for him for 3 hours and have had to come back on a few occasions because he takes so much time with every single patient, and although the wait is a royal pain, all his patients know what to expect and would rather put up with the wait than to see another doc, he's tried to have other doc's come into the practice but no one ever want's anyone but him.

By the way sex is not really painful anymore, I will be 7 weeks post op on wed and am glad I was brave enough to try at just past 4 weeks cause now it's much like before although it does take a little longer for the big O but I think it's becuase I am still nervous about it. And the big O is just as good as before! YAY!