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friends' attitude about my hysterectomy recovery...ugh!
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03-07-2014, 04:20 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 259
Hysterectomy: February 19th, 2014
Surgery Type: TVH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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friends' attitude about my hysterectomy recovery...ugh!
Everyone heals at their own rate... I'm 16 days and I am not at 100% yet... Take your time and listen to your body... Don't feel pressured to try to do things faster...
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03-07-2014, 04:27 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 265
Hysterectomy: February 17th, 2014
Surgery Type: TAH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: friends...ugh!
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Quote: |
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Originally Posted by lrmctexas
This thread is making my eye twitch.
Comparing a TAH to a C-section. No. Just no. A C-section is a shallow procedure compared to a TAH, and and and... I have an entire diatribe I have honed and perfected over the years on this subject.
Having sex at 2.5 weeks?! Does she lack self-control? Is she in an abusive relationship? Was she high on pain killers? Did she fall off the operating table and suffer a head injury nobody told her about? I know early sex happens but those people do not treat it as something to be humblebragging about.
deb - I'm sorry your friends are acting like they had their surgery in an alternate reality where they bounced back immediately and flowers sprang along their path as they skipped back into their day to day activities practically before the surgeon finished up. If you end up freaking out on one of them you can always blame the hormones.
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This cracked me up!!
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03-07-2014, 06:52 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 180
Hysterectomy: February 7th, 2014
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: friends' attitude about my hysterectomy recovery...ugh!
Its funny that my one friend had a hysterectomy and she told me to just smile and say "well arent you awesome" when people make stupud comments. I hit 4 weeks today. I have women telling me at work oh I was up in a week, us there something wrong that you arent healing any faster? However, I work at a private golf club that is largely men. Every man tells me I am doing great and not to over do things.
Sonetimes I understand why I had more guy friends growing up. Lol
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03-07-2014, 09:40 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 25
Hysterectomy: February 3rd, 2014
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Re: friends' attitude about my hysterectomy recovery...ugh!
I'll be 5 weeks post-op Monday after a TAH that included an extensive endometriosis clean-up. I've already ended up in the ER once because of dehydration and on antibiotics twice for infections. Top it all off with a cold. Sufficed to say I've been miserable.
Yesterday morning I woke up after only a couple hours of sleep, sick with barely a voice and my wife and I got into a huge fight. She's one of those people who compare my TAH with her C Section (we have a 15 month old). Throws in my face how she had to take care of a baby after giving birth. It all came to a head yesterday when I flipped out after she was asking me to do too many things at once. She doesn't get that I'm physically exhausted, mentally depressed, and just overwhelmed by everything that's been going on. She yelled at me to "get my sh*t together and get better already" and then when I started crying, told me to grow up and stop. She has never spoken to me like that before. She hasn't been all that supportive and has made me feel guilty for not being well, but I never would have expected that from her. She apologized, but I can't forgive her or trust her now. It's awful - you'd think women would be more supportive of other women, but they really aren't. Sometimes I think having a wife in this situation is worse than having a husband - at least men know they're clueless about hysterectomy recovery!
Sorry to rant, but I needed somewhere to let it out. It's been eating me up inside, replaying it over and over again.
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03-07-2014, 09:56 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 29
Hysterectomy: February 5th, 2014
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Re: friends' attitude about my hysterectomy recovery...ugh!
I heard the c-section spill myself. No way. No how. And I swear, if I hear "you'll feel like a new woman" again I'm gonna scream. At this point, I'll take a slightly used woman! To the original poster and others who aren't getting support- I'm deeply sorry!
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03-08-2014, 02:20 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 231
Hysterectomy: January 9th, 2014
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: friends' attitude about my hysterectomy recovery...ugh!
This feed was so interesting to read. I had super cervical DaVinci, and I can tell you it is nothing like a C section. Not many C section stories where you hear them leaving you in the position they do for Four hours. I'm 9 weeks and still have days I have to stop and was just given clearance at 8 wks for intercourse, because I ended up with a post surgery infection in one incision. I also kept my ovaries, but I am having a heck of a time with my legs, and breast tenderness like we did during pregnancy. Glad we have this web site so that we can see other women who experience different aspects of this surgery...
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03-08-2014, 02:31 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 63
Hysterectomy: February 25th, 2014
Surgery Type: TLH
Ovaries: Removed both
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friends' attitude about my hysterectomy recovery...ugh!
Oh my you are SO right! I've been told by everyone from my boss to my own family that I'll be 'a new woman' & it is really starting to rip my knitting! Were they all so unhappy with the old me that they are hoping for a miracle??? News flash: I had a hysterectomy not a personality transplant.........grrrrrrr xx
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03-08-2014, 02:45 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 85
Hysterectomy: February 27th, 2014
Surgery Type: TAH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: friends' attitude about my hysterectomy recovery...ugh!
I like the passive aggressive response 'You are special!' People do not know what to say. I had someone tell me I will gain weight if I have the Hysterectomy as if to deter me from doing it. Well come what may - I could not survive the way I was before. When that didn't deter me she told me I was having surgery to miss work. I wonder if I was getting a kidney, lung or leg removed would she say the same thing. People say stupid stuff. Have to let it roll off our backs.
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03-08-2014, 07:35 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 1,619
Hysterectomy: August 22nd, 2005
Surgery Type: TAH
Ovaries: Removed both
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Re: friends' attitude about my hysterectomy recovery...ugh!
I'm so sorry you're getting comments like that from what should be your in-house support system.
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03-08-2014, 08:19 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 147
Hysterectomy: February 20th, 2014
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: friends' attitude about my hysterectomy recovery...ugh!
wow. I am amazed at how wide spread this issue is. I did want to add that even tho my "friends" are driving me nuts, my fiance has been the most supportive ever. He has been taking such good care of me and trying his best with the house and cooking. I am so very lucky to have him.
And I did get a boost from one lady at work. Messaged me on Facebook and after finding out why I wasn't at work, she said she had had a partial hysterectomy a few years ago and it certainly wasn't any fun and for me to take my time coming back and heal right!
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