Severe depression and anxiety

I posted on the "Menopause" list, but it doesn't seem to be as active as this one, so I'm posting again.

I have struggled with depression for over 20 years and been on several different types of medications over the years. I'm not taking anything for depression right now, but I started taking the Nortryptaline the gastroenterologist prescribed for what he has diagnosed as "functional abdominal pain syndrome" (severe abdominal pain and vomiting necessitating ER visits - last one was 4 weeks post-op; ob/gyn thought pain was from fibroids and scar tissue in uterus, but had another pain episode AFTER surgery, so apparently that wasn't the source of the pain).

I feel more depressed than I ever have. I feel more anxious than I ever have. My heart feels like it's racing, but all cardiology tests are "normal" (that doctor thinks it's necessary to underline the word "normal" twice when he sends my test results; feel like he thinks I'm a hypochondriac, but I swear it DOES feel as if my heart is racing; I can see my heartbeat thru my shirt).

I'm not sleeping well, even with the Nortryptaline. Can't function the next day after taking Amitryptaline, which was originally prescribed; makes me too sedated (gastro doctor didn't believe me on that; said he'd never heard of someone feeling that sleepy from it).

My FSH was 74 or something when it was tested 2 weeks ago, and ob/gyn said I'm in menopause (kept my ovaries).
Thyroid was normal.

I can't take HRT because of previous PE's & DVT's.

I'm not sure what kind of doctor I need -- I have been to so many over the last few months, and money is very scarce from being off after surgery for 4 weeks, so I can't just keep going to the doctor and paying the $30 co-payment; I don't have it.

I guess I'm mostly just venting, but any support or suggestions will be very appreciated; I feel like I am hanging by a thread emotionally.

Lexapro has worked for me. I've been taking it for years.

I will keep you in my thoughts.

I started with welbutrin, but it wasn't enough so my doc added lexapro. After a while we dropped the welbutrin. Lexapro was pretty good for me for about 4 years.

I'd also used Zoloft for about 6 months but I had terrible side effects from it.

I was just being seen by my family doctor. But I was also seeing a psychologist at the same time. Now I can't see the psychologist because I work until 5pm, and not many work after that hour.

I am not taking any medications right now, but I'm like you. I've struggled for more than 20 years, and this surgery has really pushed me to my breaking point.

I would see your general practitioner as a starting point to getting help. Good luck to you, I hope you find relief.

drb -

I am so sorry to hear you are going through all of this.

There are 33 symptoms of menopause and one of them is a racing heart. I went through surgical menopause and had that for about 2 weeks.

As for the anxiety and depression I am on effexor. Effexor can also be prescribed for menopausal symptoms.

I don't know if it is your ob/gyn or primary care dr that is underlining "normal". Go to whichever one isn't underlining "normal" and discuss your issues and if necessary find a different Dr. one who will listen to you.



G.

I have had success with seeing a psychiatrist - they have specialty in use of psychotropic meds. The one I see is also an internist. I also see a psychologist weekly and have for years. Emotional issues are complex and need treatment by professionals with proper training. It is very expensive, but successful. Since my hysterectomy, I've had a rocky road with major complications, but I've been able to function because of the psych treatment I'm in. I make a lot of financial sacrifices to do so. It's awful when you (I) feel so depressed and out of control emotionally, but look for the right therapist and doctor to get the treatment you need and deserve.

Thanks for everyone's replies.

I think I probably should see a psychiatrist since they specialize in psychotropic drugs, but the problem is money, or lack thereof, of course. It's a $30 co-payment each time I go to the doctor, and then the co-payments for the medications I'm on, and I'm on several kinds of medication now. I am barely keeping my head above water financially.

It's the same thing as far as seeing a psychologist. $30 co-payment for each visit. I'm sure I need to see someone on a weekly basis, but there is just no way I can pay the co-payments.

I feel fortunate to actually have health insurance, but sometimes, like now, I am in the same boat as someone who doesn't have insurance -- if I can't afford the co-payments and can't USE the insurance, what other options do I have?

In the past I have seen a couple of psychiatrists, and they wanted me to come back for weekly "med checks" which lasted 5 minutes at the most, but required a co-payment each time, and I couldn't afford to do it, so I quit going.

I have an appointment with a new internal medicine doctor on Sept 27. My cousin sees and really likes this doctor, and it's a woman, so I'm hoping she might be a little more empathetic than the male cardiologist and male ob/gyn who did my surgery. I'm going to talk to her about prescribing some kind of antidepressant, hopefully one with a generic alternative since they're so much less expensive.

I really appreciate everyone's input; I have been feeling so alone and down.

I hear you about the costs!! Try your local community mental health agency. There are clinics that provide services on a sliding fee scale. Also check with your doctor or pharmacy about prescription assistance. Don't give up. I don't know anything about your finances, but I know how much I pay per month and it does add up. I scrimp on all other aspects of my life - travel, entertainment, cable, etc. It stinks, but I know that down the road it will and has paid off. My therapy is the only reason I am still here today. It does get better. Keep trying.

The person to see-- bar none-- is a Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner. Many of them focus on medication only. Find a good one. Where do you live?

Oh I see...Texas...I can ask mine how to find a good one.

The other thing I would suggest is a cat. No foolin'... or a dog....
Pets are the best medicine. I would not want to live without them..

I do animal assisted therapy with one of my dogs so I ain't just whistlin' Dixie...

I am so sorry you are depressed! I think that is a normal part of the healing process. It is the hormones, body changes, lack of control, don't feel like doing anything, but tired of laying around......it goes on and on. And, if you do something, it makes you so tired!
I take Zoloft, and that helps tremendously. I have tried lots of the other antidepressants the other ladies have named, and they all have worked. Ask your doctor for one that has a generic available and that will help with the cost. Zoloft and wellbutrin both have generics, among the others.
I am sorry you cannot take the hrt. I think that is helping me a lot, and I probably would have felt better if I had taken that years ago! But, my skin is really dry, so I may ask for an increase.
As your body heals, you will feel better! Best wishes to you!