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Relationship changes
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10-28-2010, 11:37 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 48
Hysterectomy: October 1st, 2010
Surgery Type: LAVH
Ovaries: Removed both
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Relationship changes
Has anyone else experienced a significant change in relationship with your significant other? My husband and I have been married almost 14 years and we have had a drastic improvement in our relationship since my surgery. He is all of the sudden physically affectionate (which he has NEVER been) and we both have noticed a strengthening in our emotional/spiritual connection.
I don't know if it is because I am finally home a little bit or if it is because I feel better or what, but I sure hope this lasts!
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10-28-2010, 11:40 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 243
Hysterectomy: February 26th, 2010
Surgery Type: TVH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: Relationship changes
If you had a lot of problems prior to surgery, health concerns, it may be that your husband was to scared or worried to show to much affection etc. Or it may be that he feels bad knowing all that you had to endure. I have found that my relationship with my husband is much better, both emotionally and physically and has stayed that way.
Good luck :-)
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10-28-2010, 11:48 AM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 1,800
Hysterectomy: May 11th, 2010
Surgery Type: LSH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: Relationship changes
It's wonderful to read this, congrats to both of you! I didn't fully realize until after my surgery how much stress my DH was feeling (ie hiding) about my physical and emotional swings. It feels good in every fibre of my being to be able to say to him "this is the REAL me, not that other person you were living with for the last couple years!!" And in turn he can see how much I went through, and that it wasn`t that I`m an unhappy person etc! When you`re in the middle of it, it`s hard to fully appreciate (for either person) how stressful it is for everyone.
Wonderful topic, and I wish you a happy renewal with your partner in life!
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10-28-2010, 01:07 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 265
Hysterectomy: September 28th, 2010
Surgery Type: TVH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: Relationship changes
My DH and I have become closer since my surgery...relying on him was hard but I soon realized he was up the task and wouldnt let me down and he hasnt..We have had more time to reflect and realize just how much we need and love each other
He has been my rock through the past 4.5 weeks..hes soothed my tears and alleviated my fears and just let me "be"
We have been married 14 years as well and want to renew our vows on our 15th anniversary next May...
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10-28-2010, 01:08 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 157
Hysterectomy: October 5th, 2010
Surgery Type: LSH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: Relationship changes
Well said, fire! I feel as if I kicked out the imposter that's been impersonating me the last few years when I kicked out the funky uterus and monster fibroids. Three weeks post-op, I keep wondering if the remaining ovary is going to charge into gear and start a hormonal rebellion. I already feel better than I have in years.
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10-28-2010, 01:45 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 98
Hysterectomy: September 11th, 2010
Surgery Type: TAH
Ovaries: Removed both
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Re: Relationship changes
My temperament seems better, we are talking more, but still want to kick him every time he comes at me sexually right now, I want more not just sex. It will either get better or we split. I will not waste another 10 years. I had my wake up call
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10-28-2010, 02:29 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 228
Hysterectomy: October 22nd, 2010
Surgery Type: TAH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: Relationship changes
crbeach,
Wondering when my temperment will get better. Right now feel like I'm on an emotional rollercoaster...tears and all.
And I hate to be the odd ball out, but I asked for a separation today from my DH. The relationship wasn't good in the get go but now...more pressure with the surgery. He feels like he does "everything" for me. Alot of "running around" and I don't thank him. I don't appreciate him. But girls...this may or may not have happened to me down the road....HOWEVER...I have a 15 year old and didnt have any female issues for 10 years after having him. He begged for children and I had two for him in quick succession. THATS when I started having issues.
I'm not saying that I dont love my kids because they are the light of my life! But to say that I don't appreciate him??? How about this is his time to show me some appreciation and not bickering with me about having to do little things around the house.
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10-28-2010, 02:55 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 98
Hysterectomy: September 11th, 2010
Surgery Type: TAH
Ovaries: Removed both
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Re: Relationship changes
Lisa I hear you, mine is constantly saying honey can you do this or why haven't you done this. I tell him now is there something wrong with your legs or you can do it. No children involved. He can't even let me have a nap without disturbing me. I think I stayed with him so my hysterectomy would be payed for which he did, and complained about it.
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10-28-2010, 03:04 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 113
Hysterectomy: April 20th, 2010
Surgery Type: TVH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: Relationship changes
I am 6 months post op and can honestly say my relationship is better than ever - I am sorry for those who are experiencing problems. I am much more level as the mood swings have gone and my DH has been a rock! Added to that I did almost die 48 hours after hyster due to bleeding out internally and think that had a profound effect on us both. Intimacy has always been good but now it's even better than ever! We have also been married for 14 years and will renew our vows again soon x
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10-28-2010, 03:14 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 147
Hysterectomy: July 30th, 2010
Surgery Type: LAVH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: Relationship changes
I am 3 months post op and the realtionship between my husband and I has changed a lot. Mostly I am not a moody witch all the time because of cramps, bleeding etc. We have been married 19.5 years, and the last 3 were really hard, but since the surgery things have been much better in all aspects of our lives.
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