still sad after surgery

Hi folks,

first and foremost, HysterSisters really helps me let my bad feelings out and start to heal. I was awfully sad at the loss of my uterus, and I still am to some extent, but these feelings are starting to heal.

However, I am still sad about everything leading up to it. I was sick for over 6 years because of my uterus. It was "enlarged" for some reason and the tissue was "spongey." I had very heavy bleeding and 2 years before I had the surgery it became very painful 3/4 weeks in a month. Before this pain set in (and got worse and worse) I was very active. I used to swim and run a mile every day after work and then follow up with additional exercises.

I experienced trauma watching myself get sicker and sicker and being able to do less and less things. I used to go climbing and hiking with my husband, but as I got worse, I couldn't handle the climbing harness or the backpack strap around my waist. I don't know how else to describe this but "devastating" as I became more and more limited.

Now I am much better and I can do all of my favorite things again, but I am left with this feeling of being scared I could lose it all. I was 24 when I had the surgery, so at my age it's easy to imagine getting sick again as I grow older.

Have you all experienced feelings like this, around the illness more-so than the loss of your uterus? How have you coped?

Erin

i have no regrets about losing my uterus as I was at risk for getting cancer. For me - no uterus beats dealing with cancer later on in life.
Thats my take on it.

Why live in the bad past if your present is much better?

That is what my old wise granny used to call 'borrowing trouble', and yes I was guilty of doing it too.
I found tha if I concentrated on counting my blessings when I felt the melancholia coming on, it helped.
Good for you for having a positive outcome, it is a blessing that you are able to do the things you love. Don't worry about what MIGHT happen, think about what DOES happen!

Hi Ladies,

Thank you for your insights. I think I have issues around "living in the past" so I will take your good advice and try to change my outlook. It's powerful to see you folks who have done this.

Best,
Erin