Does anybody miss their cervix?

I am looking for advice specifically from women who previous to their hysterectomy enjoyed having their cervix "bumped" during sex. After it was removed, did you find that sex was significantly different? Was it less enjoyable without your cervix? If you had to do it all over again and if your condition would have allowed it, would you have kept your cervix?

I know this is a very specific question, but it's the only thing I'm still unsure about. My doctor wants me to remove my cervix because she is not doing morcellation right now given the current controversies. She also thinks I really should not do abdominal surgery because it is more high risk, longer recovery times, etc. I'm not sure it is worth taking on the additional risks just so I can keep my cervix.

Also, the idea of having an pocket that leads to nowhere really weirds me out for some reason. I'm not really sure why.

Hi FBT -

I had a TAH BSO so everything is gone - uterus, cervix, and tubes and ovaries on both sides. No choice for me.

Sex does feel different for me. My orgasms are not as intense - I miss the muscle contraction of my uterus. But, they are more frequent. We do have to use lubricant which really frustrates me. DH cannot tell any difference. More than my cervix, I would keep my ovaries if I could have.

If your doctor removes your cervix, she will create a vaginal cuff. Think tube sock and you will have the right idea. After you are released for sexual activity, the vagina will stretch. It may take some time, and you need to get back to this part of your life VERY SLOWLY.

Thank you for the response, it actually helps a lot. My doctor wants me to keep my ovaries. When I go to my pre-op appointment, I'm going to tell her that the only reason I would sign off on one or both of them being taken during surgery would be because of cancer. I'm also going to discuss my wishes in detail with my husband so that he can be my advocate if anything comes up while I'm under anesthetic. Luckily cancer is not suspected, so I don't think it'll be a problem. Sometimes I get cysts, but they are small and resolve on their own without extreme pain, so in my case I'd rather live with that than not have ovaries.

I think I've decided to go ahead with the LAVH even if it means losing my cervix. I've researched morcellation and decided it's a risk I'm not willing to take. I also want to avoid abdominal surgery if at all possible because I am not in a position to take more than a month off work. So sadly, it looks like my cervix has to go.

If sex is just different, I think I can live with that. I do not like the uterine contractions I get with orgasm. They are just painful for me. Over the last year my orgasms have gotten less intense and less plentiful. I'm not sure if that's because of my adenomyosis, if my hormones are imbalanced, or because of some other issue. I still have the sex drive, just not the orgasms, so I'm not really sure what my problem is. It is very strange to me to have the desire of a high school boy and the response of... I don't know... someone with orgasm problems. If sex turned into something that was "oh that's nice I guess" instead of something amazing, I'd get used to it. I wouldn't be thrilled, but it wouldn't ruin my life. My husband is prepared for 6 weeks of no sex, but I'm not sure if he realizes we'll have to take things slowly once we start up again. I'll make sure to discuss this with him as well and make sure he knows to not take it personally if things don't go well for me the first few times. I'll also make sure to have lubricant in case I need it.

I'm still weirded out by the idea of a cuff. I'm not really sure why I'm ok with taking out my uterus, but somehow removing my cervix is against the natural order of things. even though the cervix IS part of the uterus. Yes I realize this doesn't make sense. I keep sort of arguing with myself over this. I've looked for medical photos of vaginal cuffs, I thought that might help me, but I haven't found any. I'm the sort of person that likes all the info I can get. I was apprehensive about surgery till I watched some videos on youtube, then sort of decided "oh, that's all they do? that's not so bad". I'll have to ask my doctor to hold up a mirror for me or something at my post-op exam.

Hi FBT -

Maybe your lack of orgasm is due to pain. That can definitely put a damper on things.

This surgery can cause all kinds of thoughts. It is understandable to keep your cervix, but loose your uterus. It is the neck of the uterus, but can still be an intimate part.

Sex is different for everyone after surgery. For some women it is better, some it is worse, and everywhere in between. But, from posts I have read from women who had painful sex before surgery, sex after surgery was much better because the pain was gone.

I do not know if you can actually see the vaginal cuff with a mirror. It is pretty deep inside, and will be right where they remove your cervix. Here is an article: Vaginal Cuff after Hysterectomy | What Is It?

And yes, you will need to work SLOWLY back into that part of your life after you are released for sexual activity. Keep in mind that you need to be on total pelvic rest for your restricted period. That means no outer stimulation as well as any sexual activity. All of those tissues need to heal.

DH and I were released for sexual activity after six weeks. But it was way to painful for me, so we waited another two weeks. Then it was better, but it still took time to work back into our routine.

Good question, FBT. I actually wonder about the same thing! Thank you for asking. I will watch for more responses.

	Quote:
Originally Posted by FBT I am looking for advice specifically from women who previous to their hysterectomy enjoyed having their cervix "bumped" during sex. After it was removed, did you find that sex was significantly different? Was it less enjoyable without your cervix? If you had to do it all over again and if your condition would have allowed it, would you have kept your cervix? I know this is a very specific question, but it's the only thing I'm still unsure about. My doctor wants me to remove my cervix because she is not doing morcellation right now given the current controversies. She also thinks I really should not do abdominal surgery because it is more high risk, longer recovery times, etc. I'm not sure it is worth taking on the additional risks just so I can keep my cervix. Also, the idea of having an pocket that leads to nowhere really weirds me out for some reason. I'm not really sure why.

Love this thread! I have been having similar concerns. In my case my cervix has to go. I will have a TAH, there's no getting around that. The fibroids are too large and blocking my cervix and the only real option is to open me up. I can live with that. Another abdominal scar is not going to bother me. There are some sarcoma cancer concerns as well so am waiting to see the oncologist.

I have been wondering about losing my cervix and how it will affect the enjoyment of sex. I'm hoping I will be okay in that area. I am just terribly worried about the cutting and the cuff and nerves being damaged. I don't have uterine orgasms. I have clitoral and vaginal ones and that's where my concern about nerve damage comes in. Losing the enjoyment and orgasms of sex would be devastating to me. Honestly, I would be a right mess if I lost my orgasms. Being 'different' I could probably adjust to, but the loss of would devastate me.

I had also decided to keep my ovaries because the idea of menopause right now sets a fear in me that I can't really describe. BUT now with the cancer concerns my husband, who has very much been 'your body, your decision' has changed his thinking and doesn't understand why I don't also want to remove my ovaries. I am hoping the oncologist can explain it to him.

Anyway, just letting you know that you aren't alone in your concerns. So many women, so many different issues that lead to their hysterectomies, I don't think any one story can be the same, but it is nice to gather information.

My doctor explained the process of morcellation to me, but then told me she no longer performs that type of procedure. I would stay as far away from that as possible.

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Originally Posted by thepurplepainte Good question, FBT. I actually wonder about the same thing! Thank you for asking. I will watch for more responses.

Cheers to FBT for putting this question out there! I had the same concerns you mentioned, and my doc's response was the same also. I thought I would be going abdominal, but now we're doing the TLH, leaving my ovaries so I can enjoy this peri-menopausal roller coaster I'm riding.
I suppose the "bottoming out" sensation post-op wouldn't be the same with or without the cervix, since the upstairs neighbor will be gone. This is gonna take some getting used to, for sure. Probably ought to check out some of the post-op "outercourse" threads, too!

i wanted to respond even though my personal story is much more complicated due to cancer and radiation treatment. however, i wanted to share that as i was talking to a friend who had hyster due to endometriosis, she told me that she had everything taken out except the cervix. i responded with, "oh that's great that you were able to keep the cervix!" to which she made a face and said, "i don't know why the dr was so adamant about keeping, i could care less". we weren't close friends, so i didn't feel comfortable going into a deeper discussion with her about that issue. she was on hrt , looked wonderful, has a great husband and family, perfect life on the surface in other words, anyway, her comments were more along the lines of, "i have no idea what's the big deal about keeping the cervix". i think women have different sexual expectations based on what's going on in their marriages.

I am not sexually active but have gotten no bad juju from losing my cervix; orgasms at least are the same or better (there's no giant boulder in the way of everything). And for me, not having to get a pap smear ever again for the rest of my life was a major thing for me. Paps were always either nightmarishly painful or impossible, and not needing any more of them was a massive relief. I often say it's like being let out of jail.

I've noticed that women with adenomyosis often seem to say that sex improves vastly for them with the removal of the cervix since it was so inflamed and painful beforehand.