Help! What to tell my Boss?

I am two weeks post today, TAH. I have already received 4 phone calls from work asking different questions. Last Friday my Boss called with a payroll question, after I answered his question he asked " So how much longer are you going to be out? It was three weeks right?" I said well it could be three more weeks. I got silence on the other end. So I told him I had my first post-op appt. on Monday an I would know more then. So today (or rather yesterday seems its after midnight), my doctor said I should be out at least another 2 weeks and then he would talk to me and see how I am doing. I am fine with that, in fact I am happy 'cause I have been reading from all you sisters to make my recovery a good one and not to overdo. But now I don't know what to tell my Boss, obviously he does not understand the extent of this surgery. I am at a loss as to what to say to him, I have worked with him for twelve years and I feel loyal but want to take care of myself too. Help!

I would just be straight with him. Let him know that the doc advised you to be off 2 more weeks..maybe 3 weeks.

Tammy

I'm one of those brutally honest people and would just explain what all they took out while you were in surgery...the extent of the pain...and how you are feeling...and if that doesn't work, politely tell him that you don't appreciate that he wants you to come back early, that you are supposed to recover for at least 5 weeks to make sure you're better and nothings wrong, what happens to him if you go back early then end up out again because your sick?

Men.......

Hugz
Bernadette

I feel sorry for you with your boss. I am lucky and have had exactly the opposite with my boss. When I told him that I had to have a TAH and thought I might be off for 6 - 8 weeks, he said more like 12 weeks I would think. Then when I offered later on in my recovery to do some work at home (thinking I might be getting bored) - he thanked me for the offer but said I wasn't even to think about work, just relax and getting better. Then last Friday towards the end of my fourth week, he came and fetched me and took me to a firm's night out gliding and BBQ - needless to say I didn't do the gliding. But it was good to meet up with my work colleagues again and then he brought me home afterwards. I didn't think he was a particularly good boss, but at times he can be.

I was getting some calls too, I told the folks calling to double check my answers because I was on narcotic pain relievers and couldn't be sure I was thinking clearly. The calls stopped...

My doc advised me to tell my supervisors that I would be out for about 8 weeks, and that is just what I did. The doc said that if I was ready to go back at 6 weeks then great, but it was better to plan on being out the full 8 weeks.

Would it help if your doctor faxed or mailed a note to your boss?

Hi Boo-boo, So sorry your having this difficult time. I am another person who hates to miss any time from work, but what I learned after surgery is you must take care of yourself. I would be very honest with your boss and if need be explain all that you have undergone. If you think it would help you could have your Dr send your boss a note explaining why you need the extra time to recover. Take good care of yourself! Melanie

Can you do any part of your job at home on your computer? I went back to work on Day 5, but back to work was right here at home. You might be able to ease yourself into a cushy telecommuting job if you can be useful at home.

I agree with the other posts..be honest. I would tell your boss that recovery is 6 - 8 wks, have your doctor fax a statement from his office stating exactly that, and let it go. If you are doing well and your dr releases you early, then great. But, if you are on medical leave, you can not return to work without a written release from your dr. anyway! At least that is how it is here where I work...they wouldn't allow me to come in until they had that written release from my dr. I was out 7 1/2 weeks before I returned to work.

The bottom line here is...we are given 4 - 8 wks. as a recovery period. However, our bodies will continue to heal for 6 mo. to a year. This recovery is a looooong journey! Your body needs time to heal, and you need lots of rest before returning to the "real world"! Be good to yourself. Work will survive without you for a short time!

I agree - get a note from your doctor. My boss is great and has been very supportive so far but I tend to wonder how it will be when week 6 gets closer! I have all intensions of getting a note from my doctor so that I can just send that to him. They call me with questions on occassion and I am fine with that. But I don't intend to set foot in that building until at least 6 1/2 to 7 wks post-op. My doctor told me pre-op to take 6 wks - 8 if I can. We'll see. But enlist your doctor's help. They are there to help you.

I'm sorry to hear this. My boss called to check up on me too. However, he received my answering machine. I have all the ringers turned off on my phones in the house because I did not want too much disturbing during my recovery period. I also did not want any stress because there is nothing I can do. When he left the message, I called him back and received his voicemail. My message stated that I received his message, and I appreciated that he called to check on me. I suggested that he can call me back, but I might be sleep because of the pain medication. I also suggested that if he leaves me a message I will call him back. I never heard back from my boss. I think this is a nice way of letting him know that I cannot serve any purpose at work because I am resting. It not being harsh.

I have satellite with a caller id receiver, so when I am watching television I can choose to answer the phone or not. When I go to sleep, I get my rest. Plus, I do not have to hear the ringer which is bothersome. When I checked my caller id after I get up, I received several phones and less messages on the answering machine. Those who didn't leave messages; it weren't that important. This is my phone rule: I do not return phone calls unless I received a message from you. I hope this will help you.

Cheryl