Feeling very down today

Sorry in advance for this downer post, but I figured someone out there could relate to how I'm feeling right now. I just feel so alone. I spend all day by myself until my daughter gets home from school. And then by the time my husband gets home from his crazy busy days and evenings of work, he is so exhausted that he falls Asleep by 9pm.

Then, he and my daughter have been attending Penn StAte football games the past few weekends ( we are season ticket hholders) so I am again alone.

I try to do stuff outside the house to keep me sane but then I am exhausted or sore afterwards which then sets me back another day. I am just sooooo stir crazy and feel line the world is happening around me and I am stuck in the middle not being able to join in. I'm really feeling sorry for myself today and I hate it!!!! I just want to resume life as normal, but these dang ureter stents have me peeing every half hour to hour so I spend so much time in the bathroom. And I can't go out walking too far cause I get tired easily. I just don't know how far I should be pushing myself. I don't want to set my recovery back any further.

Any advice from anyone who has gone through this????

Awww...I am sorry you are having a tough day. I know how it feels to watch everyone live their lifes around you cuz I have been feeling it for a good year now. Just remember that you are on the recovery path and soon you will be able to join in and live your life. You just gotta be patient with yourself to let yourself recover properly now so that you can move forward. Soon this will all be a distance memory for each of us.

Hi

Sorry you feel this way! I think I had it yesterday. You are on the path to recovery though and all of this will be behind you!!! Try to be happy that your husband and daughter are doing things together because in reality what would you rather they be doing?

I know it's hard to be alone when you don't feel well and this is feeling like an eternity (for me too, and mine was on Oct. 25). I log on this website and read, read, read - and try to help.

My new venture is I'm going to organize my recipes! Do you have photos to do? Then I'm writing my xmas cards (sounds weird right but whatever).

So Hugs to you and I'm sorry you're down today. I hope tomorrow is better for you!

Like both you and Hope, my life has been on hold much of this year also. So I understand how healing can be a very lonely and frustrating process. All we can do is what our body lets us. It seems so slow now as you wait to see improvemets. Yet each small victory leads to another. They will eventually become bigger victories. Every time I would try a headlong rush back to normal it would set me back. I quess we need to be the tortoise rather than the hare.

I know how you feel, I can be surrounded by people and still feel alone.
What I did was go to lunch with a few close friends that wanted to laugh and not dwell on what I had gone through. Maybe you should just ask your husband to take you out for a lunch also. I am at 8 weeks and there are times that it seems like my body is crawling out of my skin, then other days just don't have energy to leave the house let alone do anything.
Take care and know you can always vent here

added this on to a different post in this thread.... YIKES.. I think I totally messed this up... lol

What you're going thru with the stents and spasms sounds awful. I'm so sorry for you. After giving it some thought I would feel just like you! So I'm sorry - be brave! (for lack of something else to say). This too shall pass.

Your male friend meant no harm. He doesn't know what to say or do either.

	Quote:
Originally Posted by bharris Sorry in advance for this downer post, but I figured someone out there could relate to how I'm feeling right now. I just feel so alone. I spend all day by myself until my daughter gets home from school. And then by the time my husband gets home from his crazy busy days and evenings of work, he is so exhausted that he falls Asleep by 9pm. Then, he and my daughter have been attending Penn StAte football games the past few weekends ( we are season ticket hholders) so I am again alone. I try to do stuff outside the house to keep me sane but then I am exhausted or sore afterwards which then sets me back another day. I am just sooooo stir crazy and feel line the world is happening around me and I am stuck in the middle not being able to join in. I'm really feeling sorry for myself today and I hate it!!!! I just want to resume life as normal, but these dang ureter stents have me peeing every half hour to hour so I spend so much time in the bathroom. And I can't go out walking too far cause I get tired easily. I just don't know how far I should be pushing myself. I don't want to set my recovery back any further. Any advice from anyone who has gone through this????

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Ok... so I just was venting a little to a friend (male) who said "I'll trade ya places. I would love to be able to lounge around for a few weeks. You are looking at this all the wrong way."

OMG -- I lost it on him... first of all... men don't get it at all (well, except for DH who has been very understanding and has not judged me at all). I said back to him.. "you are right. I should be enjoying the fact that I have to get up to pee every hour (or less) which then leads to 10 mins of bladder spasms. And then feeling like my insides are going to fall out the bottom of me just for walking up to the end of my street and back and then having to sit on the couch to recover until I get brave enough to get up and get a glass of water so that I can head back to pee 10 mins later. Yes, I should be enjoying my lounging."

Boy am I so ticked off at him right now. I understand that he is not having the best life right now either... he's a single Dad who has a job he hates and is single-handedly trying to fix up his house so that he can sell it, so he never has any down time... I get that... but... don't you dare tell me that you'd rather be in my shoes right now and expect me to see that as motivation!!!!!

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Sorry... just had to get that out before I exploded!!!!!

I'm 5 weeks from my Davinci, had the whole works out for uterine cancer but I got very lucky & don't need treatments, it was stage 1. I went back to work this week 1/2 days and feel just like you. I can be in a crowd of friends but still feel out of it .. I think down days are part of the whole deal, don't you? And I can jump out of my skin at some of the remarks made when friends comment on my surgery .. simple things, like someone asking me was it like the movies when the dr said I had cancer. No. You. Didn't.!!!! Part of my salvation in recovering has definitely been this site, I come here all the time and may not comment much but I'm always reading the entries. Let's all remember, one day at a time .. and tho we don't know each other personally, I consider many of my hyster sisters my new BFFs!!

Hi Beth,
It's funny that my brother said the same thing about wishing he could take a month off just to lounge around and do nothing. My first reaction was to snap at him. But I know that he wasn't minimizing my situation. His job is very stressful right now and a break sounds good. He did say he'd love the break w/o the surgery.
Please try not to take it personally, I'm sure he didn't mean it that way.
I had a couple of very down days earlier this week. I find that going outside for a walk or even just in the back yard helps me. I'm trying to find the things that make me happy. A call to a friend and a funny movie helps my mood. I love Starbucks lattes which I used to get several times a week before the surgery. Yesterday my dh went to his office for a couple of hours and I asked him to bring one home for me and it was such a treat. He's bringing one home again today. Try to find the little things that you know make you happy.
Keep posting. You're not alone. We're all in this together.