I'm already an emotional basketcase....

My surgery is scheduled for march 27. I have good days where I am calm and very accepting of the surgery and then I have days when I cry and am paralyzed with fear. I have found some relief in mediatation. I have a relaxation tape from fitness instructor Kathy Smith. It really helps alot. I try to visualize myself coming home from the hospital whole and on the way to recovery. I have a daughter who really needs me and it is my fear of something happening... going wrong that results in my not being here for here and that is so scary. I know that logically that in most cases, something like what one in 1000 something goes wrong so I try to be positive. But i will tell you the waiting is awful isn't it... especially on those rare days when the pain isn't that bad.. I find myself saying... do I really need this operation now.... but I remind myself that I really do need this... the pain is awful.. I have fibroids and adeno.... I LOVE this site and its a blessing but I also think its helpful to say away from the posts about surgeries from "he%%." they are scarey and not what usally happens..
my very best to you...
be strong.... this too will pass..... ( oh god let it pass soon LOL)
kara

Dear Lysa,

Well you have some great responses this time around There is nothing like having the support of hystersisters to help through this challenging time. I know this site has helped me so much. I know we have a similar issue of needing a hyst and a bowel resection, it is definitely scary at times to think about it all.

I agree with everyone else who said that what you are feeling is normal, and it is good to talk about it and get it out. You are in a state of grieving. Since you struggled so long to concieve children, I could understand why having a hysterectomy would be especially emotionally difficult for you. You probably have lots of feelings that need to be addressed because of this. We are here to listen and give a shoulder to your valid fears and sadness. It is a journey, or process; this walking through the many different feelings and then finally coming to some acceptance of what we must do to be healthy again.

I agree with the one hystersister who said that on good days she will start to think that she doesn't need the surgery. That is how I feel on good days too. It makes for a real rollercoaster ride. But are we having fun yet? I hear that the waiting is the worst part. Once the waiting is over then at least that particular "rollercoaster ride" will be gone, and we can start the real fun of resuming our life again with our family, friends and children. On with life!

hi i am 33 with 3 children and having my hyst om 18th feb. ihad my pre-op yesturday and the nurse aked about the children visiting,i said we thought we would play it by ear.she said it was sensible.My op. is on monday and she thought they would probably be able to come in on thusday.my children are 8 5 and 3.my middle boy is quite a mummys boy and i will miss that and am hoping it wont upset me too much by seeing them.I have bought them a little goody bag for their first visit,it may occupy them for a short while.
Also i found i was more nervous a month ago than i am with only 6 days to go. i think i am too busy its half term for the children,hubby has flu and i am trying to sort out all the last minute bits,so maybe you will find this too!
best of luck
debbiexxx

Hi Lysa
Im going to the castle the same day as you. So here is some empathy from down under! I will be thinking of you. Im 31 with a 2yr old. I was fine till last night where I just lost the plot and cried, but after sleeping have my perspective back. I posted last night and have always been encouraged by the sisters here. I think I would be in a real mess without the support of people who know what it is like to go thru this.

Im going to see how I go before DD comes to visit. I dont want to stress her out with looking at all the drips etc and me being out of it. I think I will talk with her on the phone the first day and take it from there.

Someone told me to take some blu tack (sticky adhesive - dont know what its called in the states) to put pictures up with. This way if my DD wants to bring me special drawings, they can go up while she is there. Hopefully it will be good for both of us, she gets to do something to help her deal with me being away and I get cheered up by having a piece of her creativity with me.
Keep in touch & God Bless
Lucy

I know what you mean by leaving your kids! It's so hard. Mine came up in the afternoon after surgery. They are older though and easier to reason with than a 2 y/o. Mine are 6y/o, 10y/o and 20y/o. It's a good idea to call your little ones when you are feeling like talking for a minute to them. Make sure though that you have some help at home. You won't be able to pick your little ones up for a while, but they can snuggle in bed with you or crawl up in your lap. They understand more though than we give them credit for. Be patient with yourselves! You are all having normal fears and feelings! Thank goodness for Hystersisters!

s and Blessings
Janie