superwoman. ..A little underestimated hysterectomy procedure

So in the same boat. My surgery was 4/15 TLH & BSO...told my boss I would be back in on 4/21. Wth was I thinking? Got a sub lined up for myself for yesterday & today....now laying here dreading making the phone call telling them I can't make it in tomorrow! I would love to just say don't count on me until next Monday as realistically I'm absolutely exhausted & don't see myself working at all this week. The person we call for subs always makes you feel bad when you call...so I don't even want to make the call!

I'm a single mom to a 15 ur old that we found out today has mono & a cranky, teething 6 month old! Lord give me strength!!!!

KD dont' let her make you feel bad!!! If you need the time take it, otherwise you risk either having to leave mid day or worse, doing damage that takes you out longer.

It will get better. You have all paid your dues and not only need but deserve to take the time to recover properly. So what the house is messy (and this is coming from an OCD neat freak), kids in miss matching clothes (or too small or out of season...its 45 degrees out there and they are in shorts), and your caregiver is on a first name basis with all the people working drive thrus or the pizza guy. Even Wonder Woman put her feet up every so often.

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Originally Posted by rdavison I feel so alone in this at home because I want to keep up the facade that I am strong and do not need help. Husband comes home and first thing we do is fight because he didn't call to check on me today. He's resuming his normal days with the exception of getting both kids to school before work. I can't tell him how I'm feeling because most times I don't know how I'm feeling. I want to scream and beat him with the pillow as he lays sleeping and you guessed it im exhausted but can't sleep. I saw I In someone's post how their ob talked with husband so he would know some of the expectations... What a great idea since I still don't know the expectations. Contemplating Calling him my ob to go over this now. All my friends are in early 30s so they can't relate they just know what they have seen or heard just like me. ..aaaaaahhhghhh! !!

All,
I urge you to read through as many posts on HysterSisters as possible, until the realization sinks in that this surgery is MAJOR no matter what size the incision, and that a lot of internal tissues need to rebuild and muscles will need to regain their strength. If you push this, with some self-imposed, superwoman fantasy that you can do it all, and do it right away just because the pain has subsided a bit, you're headed for trouble.
Not to tell of scary foreboding, but it starts with a little spotting in the panties, and next thing you know you're back looking at being reopened for repairs! And it CAN happen to you! One shot at this recovery process is enough, and is really all we've got.

Please heed the warnings.Take this time for YOU to heal, and to be helped. You do not need to be a martyr! The hubby & kids will survive (and maybe will appreciate all that Mommy does for a change:-)...nah, not likely. But the house Will get cleaned when it gets cleaned!

Also, how often do we get to take a nice, prolonged break, laying around the house, bloated, eating, watching movies, catching up on our Web surfing and reading, etc? I am an avid, daily runner, and a clean-house freak, but I am totally learning to put my type-A, army sergeant personality away for awhile! I figured out how it simply ain't worth it, when I decided I was stronger than the average woman, and tried going upstairs and vacuuming. Yeah! That was pretty dumb (as my Dr not--so-gently scolded me, when I started bleeding & cramping severely that night.)
This healing business is No Joke! Take it very seriously. A suggestion I heard from another type-A was to write up a daily plan/schedule that includes naps, walks around the living room, time you'll sit at the PC, shower, dressing and primping time...but fill your day. Then at night, take a gentle sleep aide, like Tylenol PM or zzzquil, to get the sleep overnight that you need. But a plan helps you Not feel like a slug, AND can be used to help others know what tasks they can perform on your behalf. Make this a joyous recovery time for you! These weeks will pass all too quickly and we'll be back at the grind!!

Love & hugs from one sister to another!

I was so happy the first day I didn't need a nap! Take it easy, overdoing it happens so quickly. Try one thing then give yourself a day (or at least a few hours) before trying something else -- I felt fine and did a few things more in a day and was down for 2 days after that. Walk when you can. Ease into lifting and bending. Do one thing, pat yourself on the back, take a rest. Even after you feel great try ease back into your regular schedule. Someone here said they measured recovery in weeks and that feels right, like a day after the week anniversaries everything seems a little bit better.

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Originally Posted by KDSullivan So in the same boat. My surgery was 4/15 TLH & BSO...told my boss I would be back in on 4/21. Wth was I thinking? Got a sub lined up for myself for yesterday & today....now laying here dreading making the phone call telling them I can't make it in tomorrow! I would love to just say don't count on me until next Monday as realistically I'm absolutely exhausted & don't see myself working at all this week. The person we call for subs always makes you feel bad when you call...so I don't even want to make the call! I'm a single mom to a 15 ur old that we found out today has mono & a cranky, teething 6 month old! Lord give me strength!!!!

Do NOT feel guilty, just tell them, you are sorry, you messed up, you had no idea the surgery would be so hard. You will be in next Monday. Very very very few things are truly "needed" or an emergency. Take care of yourself first!

I feel for you on the teething baby though!

Make your husband read the Mister Hyster sisters. Someone mentioned having about 100 stitches in there, it's MAJOR surgery. A mod mentioned at 6 wks you may only be 40% healed and 100% in a yr. I'm 12 wks and just now feeling normal, except still have swelly belly, bloating, gassy and tired. I really bought the 6 wk myth and thought I'd be back to normal , boy was I wrong. When you get home, the real work of healing begins. Pace yourself, I found myself simplifying and cutting back incredibly. I think we are so ill prepared for this surgery. Hang in there and welcome to the club

I am so glad I found this, I was starting to feel like I am going a bit crazy. I had lapro partial hysterectomy on April 9th, stayed the night and in the morning I was told they tore my bladder while trying to remove my uterus. So I had to wear a catheter until yesterday they removed it and I thought I would start feeling a bit better without the catheter but not the case. I now feel such horrible stomach pains. My stomach is tremendously swollen, my undies are tight and uncomfortable so I am wearing my husbands boxers. And the crying, I am a sensitive person already but since surgery everything makes me cry…reading the above posts made me cry as well…And when my husband asks what's wrong, I can't even begin to explain because I don't understand it either. And the constipation is impossible, I already had issues before surgery but now even after 2 doses of miralac, stool softener with every meal and laxative it is runny and nonexistent. I thought 2-4 week recovery and I feel like I haven't even started recovering from the actual hysterectomy…I was excited to have the catheter removed yesterday I did a load of laundry and that was beyond stupid. And everyone seems to think I should be fine by now, hardly anyone calls and I agree with above I feel very alone. Ugh I think this long enough, sorry for the rambling...

Thank you. . Thank you thank you...I'm not crazy or too off base with my thoughts or feelings either. I feel like you guys have just allowed me too breathe. Today my mom came and did laundry while I slept and I feel like I accomplished things... even though I didn't do the work.

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Originally Posted by rdavison Thank you. . Thank you thank you...I'm not crazy or too off base with my thoughts or feelings either. I feel like you guys have just allowed me too breathe. Today my mom came and did laundry while I slept and I feel like I accomplished things... even though I didn't do the work.

Nope not crazy or off base. I'm so glad that you've allowed your mom to help. We women are an awesome breed. So awesome that we are our own worst enemy sometimes. We can lift tall buildings in a single bound. We have octopus hands and we are so use to doing everything that everyone else forgets that they know how to do things too

You can still be Superwoman, just, after recovery. Even God rested, so why shouldn't you Lay your cape down and if makes you feel better, lay down on it or beside it, but lay down. Look at these recovery days as ones of rejuvenation. You will miss the days of rest once you are cleared.

So keep resting, don't feel guilty and let your body heal, because you can't rush your recovery, no matter how hard you try. Our bodies usually lets us know who's boss and will kindly or sometimes not so kindly remind us of such by knocking us out.

Your new quality of life is waiting for you to heal so that you can fully enjoy it. So don't worry about what gets done or doesn't get done, let those who love you, do just that, love you by helping you and let yourself heal.

Remember, that awesome, refreshing, better quality of life is waiting on you to heal. Allow yourself to do so you can go grab it!

I feel really bad for those I left behind at work, I am general manager of hd dealership and pretty much live/manage by the motto if I can do it so can you. My "family" at work needs me, but they get it...somehow they understood way before I even acknowledged this was going to really knock me down. Heck I was so oblivious I told the owner and my assistant about the procedure but no one else and was adamant I would be back to help out for a few hours on the following Monday...hahahah jokes on me. Like with the OB telling us how major this was...I was too stubborn to listen! KD call in and just tell them you won't be in for a few weeks...it sounds like you might be a teacher...your kiddos are going to need you more next month than this month as they prepare for the next grade. If the person makes you feel guilty look at it this way "all you are requesting is for her to do her job....people that make others feel guilty aren't happy people...deep down inside this person is wishing she could be calling in sick too."