This is what frustrates me the most!

This morning i woke up and felt great! I had energy, which for me, is a rare thing in the morning! I took my daughter to school and came home to do some computer time and then i had this TREMEDOUS need to lay down. I literally felt like the life was sucked out of me. So, i have been laying in bed since 10:00 am and now it's time to pick up my daughter. I had really hoped to get something done today. I hate not knowing if I am going to feel ok or not! I just don't understand how I can feel great at 8:00 and then feel horrible 2 hours later. It is SO frustrating to me! At this point, I don't know when I will be ready to go back to work. Does anyone else feel different from hour to hour?

Yes, I feel differently as the day goes on. As soon as I feel good and I think I have turned a corner, I am right back to feeling completely worn out.

It frustrates me that women feel this compulsion to be "over it" as soon as the doctor finishes putting in the last stitch. Ladies, especially ladies who are still early in their recovery, it's OH-KAY to rest. It's normal, it's natural, it's what's to be expected. Stop feeling guilty because you aren't turning cartwheels on your way through the hospital doors, aren't mopping floors and walking dogs and moving the house a little to the left, being a chauffer for your children, making four-course gourmet meals for your men. Good grief! You're full of stitches, you're missing large pieces of your anatomy, you've lost blood, you're on meds that sap energy while they mend damage, you've undergone a MAJOR SURGERY.

Seriously. This will end, you'll recover, your energy and strength will return. What would you say to a child who'd just had his or her tonsils out, what would you say to a husband/partner who'd just had an appendectomy? Why are you so superhuman that you shouldn't feel a need to rest and recover?

Gnomelady, I agree with you. I majored on resting during my recovery and really never felt sapped of energy or fatigued. Fortunately, though all my kids have left home and I made sure DH did all household tasks.

Gnomelady: I never said anything about feeling guilty or the need to turn cartwheels. My frustration is with the constant "one step forward, two steps back". I realize I had major surgery and I have done nothing but rest for 3 weeks. But I am bored! And I feel better mentally when I have some sort of accomplishment during the day, what is so wrong with that? I don't think it is unrealistic that if I woke up feeling really good to expect that feeling to last more than 2 hours, especially after 3 weeks of rest.

I don't think you understood my post. I said nothing about guilt. There is nothing for me to feel guilty about!

I think this is how recovery goes. We get periods of energy, and we get periods when we can hardly move. Monday, I slept until noon, then lay down for most of the afternoon. I was so tired all day. Yesterday I felt pretty good all day. Today I've felt pretty good all day - more mental and physical energy than I've had since surgery. I like to think I've turned the corner. But so far it has been sort of like being on a roller coaster - up then down, then up then down again. I'm 5 weeks post-op today and this is the first time I have had two days in a row feeling pretty good and energetic. Up until now, an up day, or an up half-day, was always followed by a day of exhaustion, sleeping late, and napping half the afternoon. I didn't even have to do anything in particular to have an up day followed by exhaustion - just being more alert and sleeping less seemed to be enough to wear me out!

	Quote:
Originally Posted by gnomelady It frustrates me that women feel this compulsion to be "over it" as soon as the doctor finishes putting in the last stitch. Ladies, especially ladies who are still early in their recovery, it's OH-KAY to rest. It's normal, it's natural, it's what's to be expected. Stop feeling guilty because you aren't turning cartwheels on your way through the hospital doors, aren't mopping floors and walking dogs and moving the house a little to the left, being a chauffer for your children, making four-course gourmet meals for your men. Good grief! You're full of stitches, you're missing large pieces of your anatomy, you've lost blood, you're on meds that sap energy while they mend damage, you've undergone a MAJOR SURGERY. Seriously. This will end, you'll recover, your energy and strength will return. What would you say to a child who'd just had his or her tonsils out, what would you say to a husband/partner who'd just had an appendectomy? Why are you so superhuman that you shouldn't feel a need to rest and recover?

Couldn't have said it better myself!! No matter how good I feel.....I had MAJOR SURGERY!!! The sooner I accept it, the sooner everyone around me will. If they don't...TOO ****ED BAD FOR THEM!! I will take care of ME FIRST!!!

I couldn't have said it better myself!!!! I have had to remind everyone around me that even though I am up, walking around...it has still only been 48 hours since my MAJOR SURGERY!!!! I REFUSE TO NOT PUT ME FIRST!!!! I will, however.....accept help from whomever volunteers, accept the fact that I am not going to move as fast as I did 3 days ago just yet and

Well, not all of us have someone to take care of them. I don't have a sigificant other. I don't have family. My friends do not live in the same town as I do. I have three kids, one at university, two who live here with me, my daughter works 12 hours a day, my son 14 to 16 hours a day.
I rest as much as I can, but for most of my recovery I have been home alone.
It is not guilt that makes me get up and do things, it is need. I see no reason to criticise Buttercream for expressing her frustrations during recovery.

Megan....I totally understand you! I was there also at 3 weeks like you. But now at 11 weeks just once in awhile I'll have those days. Mornings are great and then as if you get hit by a big wave....your off your feet. I feel useless first with myself then for others and that's not feeling guilty...what for? I've been thru hell for a year before my surgery. Solution? I guess we just have to be patient, just to except this awful phenomena and go forward until the day comes that maybe we will feel always good . Don't get frustrated, just do what you can for the moment and take each hour how ever you can.

I think this is just the way it works. I celebrate the times I feel good, and go lay down when I'm tired. Thankfully I have a great support system (my DD and DH) who encourage me to take the time to heal. Praying that the steps forward soon outnumber the backward ones! Blessings to all!