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afraid of sex
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09-05-2013, 12:42 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 25
Hysterectomy: July 10th, 2013
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Undecided
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afraid of sex
I had surgery on July 10th. My Dr has given me the ok to resume sex with my husband. I scared to death because she said it will be painful the first few times and I will probably bleed because I won't heal completely for 6 months. I've also read about women tearing their vaginal cuff and having to have surgery to repair it. Any experience or advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
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09-05-2013, 01:27 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 354
Hysterectomy: July 12th, 2013
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: afraid of sex
I'm scared too.. My 8 weeks is tomorrow.. ((hugs you're not alone))
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09-05-2013, 02:15 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 832
Hysterectomy: July 10th, 2013
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Removed both
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Re: afraid of sex
I am scared too. I am worried it wont feel good anymore. I never even thought about this before surgery. But i was in bad shape.
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09-05-2013, 03:58 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 28
Hysterectomy: August 12th, 2013
Surgery Type: TVH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: afraid of sex
nervous here too! 3 weeks, 4 days post op. Read a few horror stories here about torn cuffs. Guess I will just take it slow.
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09-05-2013, 04:04 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 125
Hysterectomy: May 10th, 2013
Surgery Type: LAVH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: afraid of sex
It really isn't bad. I was scared too, but my husband took all his cues from me. I still had a patch of stitches on my cuff that had not yet dissolved so I was worried about that. It didn't hurt for me, nor did I bleed. It actually has been the best it has ever been because the pain I had from the endometriosis is gone, I am no longer bleeding for months at a time and I am much more relaxed because of that.
My advice...make sure you have some lube. I don't need it now but I know my body wasn't cooperating at first.
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09-05-2013, 04:12 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 106
Hysterectomy: June 18th, 2013
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: afraid of sex
I agree, I think all women worry, myself included. I even called my Dr.s office and spoke to my favorite nurse for a pep talk. Lolol. It all went fine. Just remind your partner to take his time and you be sure to open your mouth and communicate if something hurts or you need to stop.
Like Deuxtrouble, I was fine, no pain, no bleeding, no problems.
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09-05-2013, 07:38 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 121
Hysterectomy: June 24th, 2013
Surgery Type: LAVH
Ovaries: Removed both
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Re: afraid of sex
Just go slow. Use plenty of lube. We used silicone based because it doesn't dry out as fast as water based. It was awkward at first . It was easier with me on top so I could control things. I was really scared, but my hubby is the most patient man. He wanted to try but told me to tell him immediately if I wanted to stop. I wasn't cleared for it until 10 weeks post op due to complications. It went fine. My big O was not big. Hopefully with more practice it will be better. As long as your partner is patient and gentle it will be fine!
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09-05-2013, 08:22 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 159
Hysterectomy: July 31st, 2013
Surgery Type: LAVH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: afraid of sex
Well, I don't have any experience or advice yet, but you are definitely not alone.
I was cleared at 4 weeks, which I think is crazy. My hubby and I haven't attempted anything yet. I'm scared as well. I'm still spotting and I just can't think to do anything while still spotting. My dr said I was healed, but I don't know how I can be when I'm still spotting lol
If you're healed then where does it come from
I'm also afraid everything is going to be weird or not good. DH is being very patient and not pushing for anything. He told me I'm the one that runs this show and only when I really feel like I'm able will he think about it. I'm so thankful lol
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09-05-2013, 08:41 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 125
Hysterectomy: May 10th, 2013
Surgery Type: LAVH
Ovaries: Kept 1 or both
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Re: afraid of sex
What we don't know is scary. Think back to hearing you had to have surgery...remember the fear. Totally out of proportion to what really happened (for me). Same with the sex issue. The thoughts I had are laughable to me now.
Showing up at emergency because my husband had busted through my cuff. Thinking I would bleed for days again. Thinking we'd need like a vat of KY. That I would just cry through the whole thing. That I would never have an orgasm.
And I worried for nothing.
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09-05-2013, 08:44 PM
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HysterSister
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Posts: 25
Hysterectomy: July 10th, 2013
Surgery Type: DvH
Ovaries: Undecided
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Re: afraid of sex
Thank you all so much for your advice. I'm glad I'm not alone. I feel a bit better about it. My husband has been very patient. I will use your advice and see how it goes. ;-)
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