8 days post hysterectomy - feeling all alone

Its day 8 of post op and i have so many emotions right now. I feel all alone like nobody understands and because they cant visually see my pain or stitches then i must be fine. It kills me i try and explian i have tons of stitches in side it hurts to bed walk far vacuuming dishes laundry, stuff im not supposed to be soing right now. I pushed my self to much yesterday and am in crazy pain this morning. Does not help im in a pretty new relationship going on 9 months and he totally doesnt get it. Im not sure about anybody else but understands the no sex part but takes it to the heart no cuddling or other things i miss that stuff the doctor didnt say no romance lol 😕but the point to this post is it somes to still have this much pain 8 days after having the robotic surgery? And does anyone else feel all alone ? I posted this twice i couldnt figure out how to do a new post at first 😢

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Originally Posted by liz78 Its day 8 of post op and i have so many emotions right now. I feel all alone like nobody understands and because they cant visually see my pain or stitches then i must be fine. It kills me i try and explian i have tons of stitches in side it hurts to bed walk far vacuuming dishes laundry, stuff im not supposed to be soing right now. I pushed my self to much yesterday and am in crazy pain this morning. Does not help im in a pretty new relationship going on 9 months and he totally doesnt get it. Im not sure about anybody else but understands the no sex part but takes it to the heart no cuddling or other things i miss that stuff the doctor didnt say no romance lol 😕but the point to this post is it somes to still have this much pain 8 days after having the robotic surgery? And does anyone else feel all alone ? I posted this twice i couldnt figure out how to do a new post at first 😢

Dear Liz,
please be gentle with yourself and take a lot of rest! Are you participating in your recovery thread? (The thread where everybody is in that had surgery the same week as you) it is really helpful to read were everyone is in their recovery.
If you feel people in your surrounding don't understand what you are going through you can maybe let them read some of the articles here at hystersisters.
My DH read some of the articles and that's been of great help too.

It's normal to feel sad and alone, your body has been through a lot, and your hormones will probably also behave a bit differently.
Hugs from the Netherlands

:-(

Sorry you're having such a tough time! I can't speak to the procedure you had because mine was different and I'm totally new to hysterectomies and this site.

I can, however, tell you that I've decided I don't care who is mad at me, or feels I'm not doing enough, or whatever. I'm doing what's right for me. By over doing it, I'm only going to prolong my recovery, possibly injure myself, and resent whoever makes me feel guilty.

Maybe you could print out a few things for your partner to read? I'm in a 21 year marriage, so I felt comfortable announcing that I had no intentions of pushing myself, but a younger me would not have been that assertive. Try to come up with a way you can express yourself in a way that's most comfortable for you. If you don't explain, he will never know. Oh, and there's a Mister hystersisters section I've seen on this site. It might feel a bit funny asking him to read that, but it might be a good place to find things to show him.

Good luck and SLOW DOWN!

Thank you for you suggestions im gonna go look at those threads now 😁

Hi Liz78!
I hope you are doing better now! It is important to take it easy and listen to your body. I am 11 days post-op. I had a total hysterectomy, keeping only my ovaries. I have an 8 yr old and a 10 yr old. My kids have been amazing. Even better than my hubby of 13 years. Lol!

I have learned that the laundry can wait, and I never realized my boys can make their own dinners I may take advantage of that in the future!

Anyway, I do hope your doing better and getting some cuddles from your man. He may be afraid of hurting you. Men are like that...afraid of things they don't understand. Like, us women! Lol

Amy

Thank you for your advice . im feeling a little better hearing other people tell me they have or are dealing with the same issues makes me feel not ao alone . my kids that are home are helping a little my exhusband and his wife have been taking them to give me some rest time being that two have special needs. I do think maybe my boyfriend is affraid he might hurt me even if he hugs me i dont think he totally understands because on the outside i look fine its just all the healing on the inside that he cant see so it can be deceiving to say the least. I also think my obgyn scarred him alittle after my surgery because i had a hard time after my surgery in recovery i spent 6 hours there before i was transferred to my own room. But thank you again being able to talk to people really helps 😀