Feel so alone

Hi,

I am new to this forum, althougth my problems began at age 13. My periods were heavy and I had extreme cramping. I am now 50, and wish I had had the hysterectomy at 40. Yet, I am still afraid of what will happen to me. I cannnot be any worse than I already am, but this fear has kept me all these years. I had the D and C with lapro and have endometrioios and adymyosis. I tried the Lupron shots, but they only made me feel normal for about 4 weeks for a 3 month shot.
I am scheduling the hysterectomy this week, which will include removal of my ovaries since I am 50. I would apprecaite feedback, I feel so alone.

and big S

You've come to the right place fo find hysterectomy related info and share experiences. Please feel free to ask any questions that you may have or just drop in for some comfort and cyber hugs.

You can find lots of great info in the Pre-op Articles and Checkpoints

Hello. Well, it sounds as if you have had a good, hard struggle with your reproductive system over the years. I just wondered about whether you considered keeping your ovaries and talked this over fully with your doctor or perhaps a second opinion doctor. It's true that some women leave their ovaries and end up having to have them taken out later on, but there are many others who don't have them taken out and don't have any issues arise. I ask simply because, as you know, the ovaries can continue producing a range of hormones for some time after a hyst and for some time after age 50. I had my hyst at age 51 but was, at best, only in perimenopause at that time. The sudden menopause thing, well, it's not much fun! I'd have chosen to have kept my ovaries, but my ovaries were under suspicion of cancer (I had many cysts, introduced by and sudden growth caused by an IVF program in my mid-40s).

Most of us feel very alone, even when we are looking forward to our surgeries to relieve us of our symptoms. Perhaps it is part of the grieving process we go through. Many who are our age who post to the aching hearts forum on the site talk about how they realize it might seem odd to be grieving about all this since they had reached menopause. But we grieve, anyway, or perhaps especially, because such decisions mean we've reached a new stage of our lives, where we might have more of our years behind us than ahead of us. That's a realization foisted on women (because of the whole reproduction biology issue) that men just don't have to face.

I am glad you found this site and believe you'll find some really fine women here ready to lend a listening ear and a warm heart to you.

Best wishes to you as you walk your path -- with your sisters, here.

Thank you. Your response and thoughts are appreciated. So much to think about, questions to ask and always, the decision.

Hello again. Yes, there are really a lot of things to process, aren't there? This is the page where you might find some women to talk with who had a similar decision facing them.

https://www.hystersisters.com/vb2/forumdisplay.php?f=4

It's called the options and alternatives page. If you feel like you want to find some who maybe have faced your decision, perhaps you'll consider posting a new thread over there. If you do that, you will want to make sure the subject line suits your real question. Some women post their question about this issue by placing in the subject line "ovaries or not?" and then those who have been in a place similar to yours might happen to find you and talk with you over there. This is just a suggestion. I am so happy you found us, because we all, in our different ways, grieve, and I hope and believe you will find plenty of support from us as you come to your ultimate decisions about where you are and where you are going.

Warm good wishes.

Your not alone, big hugs .. .. you d*****atly been through alot and for a long time. its a big descion and were all here to suport you and help you through it. good luck and welcome
hugs
Lisa

Popurple: I know it is such a big decision whether to do it or not. I knew I was having problems 5 months ago as I had a cystocele (my bladder was going to the south!). I was just so sick to death of having my periods too. I couldn't plan on a vacation as I wouldn't know when I would have the dreaded period.

Finally after a few months of thinking it over and reading everyones imput here on "Hystersisters," and talking to my doctor's nurses, I decided to go through with it. It was the BEST decision that I came to.

I would encourage you to go ahead and do the hysterectomy and have the ovaries removed (anyway, this is what I did). It truly is up to you whether you keep the ovaries or not. You may think otherwise. But read everything you can on the subject. Then you and you alone will have to weigh the decision.

Best wishes to whatever you decide to do! Take care.
------
TAH/BSO bladder sling. 52 years young

Hi All,

Thank you for all of the support. You have helped me immensely in moving forward.
I spoke to my mom today, who is very conservative. She reminded me my aunt died at 65, and her daughter from ovarian cancer at 49. She thought maybe it was best for me to have the ovaries removed.
My thoughts and emotion are still "everywhere." I know this is the best choice for me in my situation, but I am afraid. I fear I will go through surgery and recovery and find myself in the same place. I only want to feel "okay.'

	Quote:
Originally Posted by popurple Hi, I am new to this forum, althougth my problems began at age 13. My periods were heavy and I had extreme cramping. I am now 50, and wish I had had the hysterectomy at 40. Yet, I am still afraid of what will happen to me. I cannnot be any worse than I already am, but this fear has kept me all these years. I had the D and C with lapro and have endometrioios and adymyosis. I tried the Lupron shots, but they only made me feel normal for about 4 weeks for a 3 month shot. I am scheduling the hysterectomy this week, which will include removal of my ovaries since I am 50. I would apprecaite feedback, I feel so alone.

You have arrived in the land of Hyster....where none of us are ever alone. Welcome!

Please speak with your Dr. about your ovaries. If they are healthy, there is no reason (in my opinion) to have them removed and put yourself into surgical menopause.

I had my surgery last year, at 47....retained my ovaries. Once in awhile, I will have a day or two where I feel a bit off....then I remember that would be a PMS moment, if I still had a uterus! Had one on Saturday morning. I woke up at 3AM unable to get back to sleep as my blood sugars were crashing...odd...I ate protein for dinner. Then it hit me, I used to have these "spells" frequently a day or two before my period would start. So, I got up, ate a piece of cheese, drank a swig of water and went back to bed and zonked out until 9AM. Whew!

	Quote:
Originally Posted by blueheron2003 Most of us feel very alone, even when we are looking forward to our surgeries to relieve us of our symptoms. Perhaps it is part of the grieving process we go through. Many who are our age who post to the aching hearts forum on the site talk about how they realize it might seem odd to be grieving about all this since they had reached menopause. But we grieve, anyway, or perhaps especially, because such decisions mean we've reached a new stage of our lives, where we might have more of our years behind us than ahead of us. That's a realization foisted on women (because of the whole reproduction biology issue) that men just don't have to face. .

I can definately say that I did not grieve one bit once my Dr. told me of my options. She gave me three options....medicine; IUD or hysterectomy. I felt NO hesitation.....surgery it was. I was actually relieved when she listed surgery as an option. This meant that I could bit done with the monthly hemorraging and that since she recommended it, it was no longer "cosmetic" and became insurable.

Best decision, medically, that I have ever made.