Dr oppt tomorrow [er...today]

As I stated in my last post, I wanted a hysterectomy. I have actually been getting help from my therapist to get the ball rolling, as I have a hard time talking and making it clear what I want and need.

The doctor called today and wants me to come in to "talk" later today and I'm a bit nervous. I emailed therapist, and he responded that he had talked to her and she was very compassionate about the whole thing. He said that she agrees I would likely be a candidate for getting a hysterectomy and she would do all she could to help me achieve this. They are talking about sedating me for the necessary exams [as I have issues there as well], and seeing where it leads I guess.

I am a bit overly anxious, and I know most may not understand...but I have severe issues with being touched for the exam. The doctor told me to come in for a talk, but I do not know if she will try to coax me into more or not while there.

I guess I am looking for a little reassurance on what to expect...what is all done to see if I am a candidate for a hysterectomy exactly? What sort of things will I have to do? Is there anything specific I should be asking?

As I said, I'm a bit anxious [suffer from PTSD, Major Depression, anxiety...etc....], so I apologize now if this is a bit of a ramble.

Do you have a trusted friend that could go with you to help communicate with your dr? I know just going into a dr office can be very overwhelming! Having someone else there could make it a little bit easier.

I have one friend, but not someone who would communicate well for me. I just got back and ended up crying...I hate this.

I'm sorry to hear you had a bad experience today. I wonder if anyone could help you make some notes in writing that you could take with you on your next visit?

I am sorry you are having trouble talking to your dr.
Your post here are written very well and you were able to get your point across to us. Maybe you can write a letter to your dr with your thoughts and concerns.
Does your dr think you need a hysterectomy or is she trying to talk you out of it?
Sounds like you have a great therapist since she did call and talk to your dr.
What does your therapist suggest?
I know I ask a lot of questions and you do not have to answer them if you do not want to. .
Hoping for the courage you need to speak up and get the health care you need.

Thanks for the kind replies. The only reason my therapist knows so much about me, is because he allows me to write my thoughts out rather than forcing me to say them...I do something called "dissociation," which means I won't talk no matter what you say or do to me. I shut off and become non responsive so to speak. Writing is how I learned to "talk," when no one would listen to my voice...it unfortunally just became a part of who I am, as you can tell by my long winded posts.

My doctor was concerned if I wanted children, otherwise she doesn't seem to feel there is any reason I can't be a candidate for a hysterectomy. However she can't do the exam that would give me the 'go ahead' for the surgery, I have to go to a obgyn for full exam and possible ultra sound.

My therapist thinks a hysterectomy would help some of my PCOS symptoms but I think he mostly thinks it'll help some of my depression. I have been having dreams of everything I touch being bloody. The doctor today asked if I wanted to just try to treat it with pills first or try for a hysterectomy and I just said, "I'm tired" and that was all I had to say. She took blood work today, is going to get me back on the Metformin and prepare me for sedatives to take the day I go to my obgyn oppt late next month to discuss possible hysterectomy.

She said to write anything I have to say, which I am wondering how that will work as often what I want to say may be during akward moments. It is important for this obgyn to understand I don't want to try any more treatments or "cures." I think I worry most I will go through all this and she'll still insist I don't need a hysterectomy. I understand most want this as a last resort, but I'm 35...I'm done, I don't want to do this anymore.

I will talk to my therapist more about perhaps making some notes, or something.

Thanks for listening to me.

I think you are on the right track, expecially if your Dr asked you to write down what you want to say. If she is willing to work with you about this I think it is great. If not, try to find a Dr that is not only good at what they do but also understands you and how you communicate. There are doctors out there that can do both!!
I know when I am being "examed" I sometimes forget all the questions I want to ask. You might see if you can get your Dr. e-mail address and communicate and ask questions that way after you get home and think about what you want to ask. If you cannot get their email address ask to schedule a few appointments so you have time to write down all your questions, concerns and wishes and then present the dr. with all your notes.
Best wishes to you.

Thanks Stacie, and you are right...there are some doctors that go above and beyond. My therapist is definably one of those and with his help, my doctor is understanding more too. I will look into my options to communicate with my obgyn...I am assuming they will be letting her know I have issues and hopefully that will help. Knowing is half the battle sometimes.

Just a couple thoughts. Can your therapist speak personally with the OB/GYN and explain your mental and emotional situation? Is there any chance your therapist could attend the office portion of your appointment if that would offer you support? That may not be possible at all, but it might be worth asking.

Also, a hysterectomy is the removal of the uterus and has no effect on PCOS. An oophorectomy is the removal of the ovaries but does not cure PCOS. PCOS is a disorder of the entire endocrine system. Thus, with PCOS in the picture you need to also work with an endocrinologist as regardless of whether or not you have surgery of any kind PCOS won't go away.

While I know you have mental and emotional issues with teh bleeding portion of your period, a hysterectomy is not a risk free surgery and could open the door to new list of issues for you to deal with. Thus, this may or may not be the right option for you. Additionally, if you have an oophorectomy a whole host of new issues can arise include more mental and emotional ones. Therefore, your doctors are wise to be taking this one step at a time to make sure it would be a viable option for you and not worsen the whole situation.

And as odd as it may seem for you, many of us who felt that fertility was not a concern found out years down the road it was. Because doctors have had that occur with their patients, many tend to be very cautious in this area as there is no going back.

in there.

Weiser, thank you for the response. If the obgyn was in town, I think my therapist would go to the office part no problem...he has all ready told me that my therapy is not restricted to the four walls of that room and that if I need help outside of them, it's fine. However the obgyn is in the city and that may be too much trouble to bother him for. Perhaps we could discuss talking to her on the phone.

I know a hysterectomy will not cure PCOS...sadly, there is no cure for that. The hysterectomy will cure the bleeding, and perhaps lift some of the depression and anxiety that comes with that...I say some, as I am also very aware that my depression and anxiety is not just stemmed from that alone. I have had depression and started trying to take my life at 5ish...well before puberty. But, the bleeding DOES intensify it and it would be surprising if there was no mental relief from taking the bleeding away.

I understand the concern for having children [and I was expecting it to be asked]...but I have thought about it in great depth. I am 35, single, overweight and suffer from several mental illnesses. I do not want to bring a child into this world with those things nor do I want the risk of them having to suffer from depression, since that part seems to run in my family. I am at peace with my decision, have been for MANY years and it is the most selfless thing I can do for a child...it will be ok.

I do appreciate the concern...and I am not disregarding it at all. I know most think I am crazy, as others struggle to avoid this, and here I am openly begging for it. I can't force it to be done, which is why I am enduring these steps regardless of my difficulty with the process...I understand it may not be possible, but if there is no solid, good reason not to do it...I will have it done. I'm at the end of my rope quite literally.