TAH: one week out, freaking out

I am only a week away from TAH and just yesterday I was asking myself if I really needed to do this. Today I am reminded of why I am having this. Pain untouched by meds. Ugh. Nearly doubled over. Still trying to prepare. Got me a nice light robe, have a couple dresses. Cooked a turkey yesterday and have 3 meals worth of turkey, quite a bit of Yummy stock. Today I am making a big batch of yams, a lasagna and a couple meat loaves for the freezer. I gave stocked up on bagels, and prune and cranberry juice, bran cereal, crackers. Thanks for letting me vent.

(((hugs))) the waiting is the hardest part. Sounds like you are getting your self and your family well prepared for your recovery. I was the same way. I was not sure if I really wanted to have this done. Then I had my cycle and I was reminded that yes I was making the right choice It will be ok Hun. Just keep your self busy. My house was cleaned over and over lol. It will be here and over before you know it You are going to feel like a new woman. I love the new me.

I was freaked out waiting for mine too. I have a friend who is a nurse who told me to stop asking myself why I was having it done, and ask instead "Why not". I could never come up with an answer as to why not.

I've been having the same thoughts running through my head. Still with that constant mild cramping I feel on a regular basis even when it's not that time of the month, I'm thinking do I really need this surgery? I know I do! Soon it will be over with because I'm paid and ready to go for tomorrow morning.
Good luck to you
~Jessica

I'm there, too. I'm scheduled on August 13th and while I'm not a total bundle of nerves yet, I'm definitely fretting. I've still had second thoughts, like right now as I'm just ending my cycle and really am feeling pretty good. No pain, no pressure, sex isn't painful. (Of course the lining of my uterus is thickened again in the latest ultrasound which would necessitate at least another D&C to rule out anything bad). But then I'm reminded that I've had some pretty uncomfortable months in terms of pressure and cramping and that I also have bowel and bladder issues and intermittent pain with sex and that I have to get rid of the mass of fibroids to rule them out as a cause). Just keep telling myself it's the right thing to do and that its a fairly safe procedure. Still unnerving, and I'm sure will become moreso the closer I get to surgery.

What I'm NOT is prepared at home. I have so much going on at work right now and with a 2-year-old (who today has stomach flu and I'm paranoid that I'll get it and surgery will be postponed) that I've had no time to even consider preparation. My husband will be with me for a week after surgery and then he has to go back to teaching for the fall. The toddler will be in daycare. Other than that, I have no meals prepped in advance, I don't know what I'll be wearing, I have no special undergarments purchased, I don't know what I'll be doing to amuse myself at home when I'm not napping, and I'm not even sure yet how to keep the toddler from coming in bed with me in the middle of the night because this is his normal routine up to this point. Maybe this is why I'm not as worried yet about the surgery itself....

Hey, my surgery is on the same day! I'm also starting to get jittery - I tried to explain it to a friend, and he kept thinking I was scared. When I said that I'm not, I'm just keyed up and having a very hard time focusing on anything else, he laughed and said "that's called excitement. Go have some ice cream."

Easy for him to say, lol. I'm practically bouncing off the walls.

On the other hand, for the first time, I'm starting to realize that this is real, you know? I've made my peace with this decision a long time ago, but suddenly part of me is whispering, "this means I'll never, ever be able to have children. What if I change my mind?" which is ridiculous. I can barely walk and am in constant debilitating pain. According to the doctor who did my first two surgeries, I most likely wouldn't be able to get pregnant anyway, and how would I even meet someone when getting down the front steps makes me cry?

I guess it's just something you go through this close to surgery. As much as it sucks, it helps that my last round of lupron just wore off; now I can't let my last-minute doubts convince me that the pain isn't that bad.

I'm really glad I found this place - it's fantastic to meet and talk to others going through the same thing at the same time. Randomyvonne, would it be weird if I kept in touch? XD

Oh man, I forgot to add - best of luck, Jessica! *hugs* We'll be here on the other side. <3

Haha! Thanks

Thanks for the encouragement ladies. Best of luck to you tomorrow jes. Opal it would not be weird. What time do you go in? I am scheduled for 9 am in the or. I bet you are up and running before me though.

I'm scheduled for 7am, EST. I'm not sure I'm even going to sleep the night before - it's not like I won't have plenty of time to sleep afterwards lol.

Why would I be up and running sooner?

Sounds like the davinci has a slightly shorter recovery than the abdominal I get a bikini cut due to #1 closest davinci hospital is over an hour away, #2 I am retroverted and retroflexed an amazing amount. Doc is proud he could get a Biopsy from mehe couldn't get the d+c done.