Concerned!

"I'd be confused too and likely SCARED of that model! LOL"

This one was "common pathologies of the female reproductive system", so it wasn't pretty. Just the same, I cracked a few jokes to ease my husband's anxiety, and I think that's the key. We women talk and share (the face-to-face relationship) while men are side-by-side. Too much scares most men, and I don't say that in a demeaning way. Most men I know want to be the protector, and when they're faced with their partner's illness, it causes what we women see as shut down.

Ah-men is right!

Best,

Julia

My husband was totally checked out for the past few weeks, being rude and very distant...until I shared my "tumor humor" with him. I figure since no one knows what to say to me, I will just make them laugh...it has not only made my friends comfortable with talking about my surgery and possible outcomes (possible cancer) but it brought my husband back into my world!

"it has not only made my friends comfortable with talking about my surgery and possible outcomes (possible cancer) but it brought my husband back into my world!"

I hope you have many, many years ahead of you to laugh (although not too hard post-surgery, it does hurt a bit with a hearty belly laugh), and I pray that your possibility, if it's there, is caught early and cured.

Please keep us posted.

Julia

Most men just want to be the hunter-gatherers and go to the cave until it is time for them to come out and do their thing again. The intricate workings of the human body are not in their job description.
I talked to my older DD who is an ob/gyn nurse, I researched, I talked to my sister in law, I came to this site when I needed information.
I didn't really want to talk that much about it anyway--I figured it was what it was, I trusted my doc, and my worrying was not going to change the prognosis or the outcome.
My DH wanted to know where and when and what he needed to do. Emphasis on the "to do". They need to be given specific tasks--buy these groceries, pick up the dry cleaning, take the dog to the vet, take me to a dr appt. Think concrete.
DD and DH came to the hospital, she stayed, he stayed as long as he could. But when I got home, DH was wonderful when I was recovering--absolutely there when I needed him. I couldn't have asked for a better caregiver, though he would deny it to they guys
Hopefully, when crunch time comes and you need him to bring you water, bring you a sandwich, keep your ice filled, he'll be there for you. Remember the genetics and don't be hurt. There are plenty of women around who will listen and share the details

PS I'm now 9 weeks post op and just got back from a 2 week business trip. All is well and I forget for days at a time that I even had surgery. So, there is life after the castle!!

Thanks Julia...CT scan today...pre op tests Monday...countdown time!! YAHOOOOOOO...kinda like a roller coaster, you either go with it or get sick...

My hubby is annoyingly different, he wants to read all the details in this book he bought to get more info on it, I dunno guess he is just weird LOL

HUGS

Carol

I was just thinking about this today. My husband is very kind and caring, but he really does not want to talk about this. I have asked him to educate himself on the type of hyst I will be having but he does not do or say much. I know when the time comes he will be great. It is hard because I want to ~talk~ and it just is not going to happen...it's a guy thing.
Have a great day!
Nena

Thanks to all my sisters for the advice. I had a talk with my husband. He has informed me that he is very concerned about the actual surgery. However he does not want to know all of the details. He is going to my pre-op appointment for information. I think that he will come around. He just doesn't like to see me in pain or hurt.Thanks again to everyone for the advice.