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I'm living a nightmare I'm living a nightmare

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  #1  
Unread 08-10-2005, 10:08 AM
I'm living a nightmare

Help! I scheduled my Big H yesterday for 9/2 despite that I am in a lot of pain, it was the earliest they had unless someone canx's. I have adenomyosis and have had an awful time w/ my OB so I switched docs. The new doc was wonderful confirmed everything and I have resloved myself its what I need to get my life back.
My problem is the new doc initially said he would not approve my short term disability from now until the Sept surgery. This has been devistating to me. I hung up the phone and could not believe what I just heard. I am not able to work, canx'd my vacation that I planned last January for later this month, gave up my tickets to a baseball game, not doing much at all and he said he cannot substantiate my short term disab. I was like, how much more does he need? This same OB said that my uterus "is on fire" and that "my life pretty much stinks right now," and he cannot substantiate it!? Are docs afraid to approve short term disability? Is STD that difficult to go on? I am an insurance service rep that is on the phone w/ screaming customers all the time. I cannot work right now. I called back and spoke to the same lady and asked her to ask him to reconsider so I still have a chance but what's the deal? They all know adeno is very painful and I am getting worse each day. Or is this something w/ male docs? I could use some support right now. Its bad enough needing this surgery let alone the frustration of the red tape.
thanks for the help!
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  #2  
Unread 08-10-2005, 10:44 AM
I'm living a nightmare

fwmaggie,

Hun I'm so sorry you are going through this!
I wish I had some advice but alas I don't.
So I'm sending a and some across the miles.
My thoughts are with you..

Kristi
  #3  
Unread 08-10-2005, 10:57 AM
I'm living a nightmare

It doesn't seem unusual to me that you would not be approved for any short-term disability before your operation. The Family and Medical Leave Act should approve a leave after the operation- if you have spent a night in the hospital you should be able to use at least 3 weeks of any accumulated sick leave or vacation that you have prior to resorting to short-term disablility.

Yes, coping before the operation is miserable- I feel so well now it is hard to remember how terrible I felt while waiting for my operation. Perhaps you could try coping mechanisms like swimming every day or other exercise, and making sure to eat well (2 eggs a day really helped me- you can make into crepes with 2 eggs, 1/2 cup milk, 1/2 cup flour, then fry in a little butter). Another thing to resort to might be to ask a family practice or mental health practitioner if you could try a small dose of antidepressant like Zoloft or Celexa to be able to calm upset customers down even when you don't feel well....

-Torrie
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  #4  
Unread 08-10-2005, 11:28 AM
I'm living a nightmare

Hi fwmaggie -

You may want to ask your OB or even your primary doc to take you off due to stress right now. That's what my primary did for me when my stupid worker's comp wouldn't take me off for a rolled ankle I could barely stand on. I had no problems getting approved. I explained to him that I couldn't sleep or eat. I was crying all the time, etc.. I was at my wits end, which sounds like where you are right now. It's worth a shot. Good luck, Di
  #5  
Unread 08-10-2005, 11:54 AM
I'm living a nightmare

I don't know anything about getting your time off. I do know the pain! Sometimes it feels I'll have to die to get better. I know I have become haetful short and down right rude at times.[All the time now] The pain just gets the best of me.One of my girls just went thru this too. She was in so much pain she couldn't work.Lost her job. In the hospital the day of the surgery and the day after she cried this is just as bad. Now 6 weeks later she says she feels so foolish forj the way she acted. Like I said when you really hurt you really hurt. She is so happy now free of pain for the first time in years.She said it's like a weight has been lifted. I so look forward to mine this Monday. I wish you soj much luck and peace. Keep us up to date. Sending Love and Energy.
  #6  
Unread 08-10-2005, 12:09 PM
I'm living a nightmare

I don't know how it is with short term disability, but in a case of long term disability-you are automatically denied 3 times. At least in the state of Kansas. Maybe they have similar guidelines for short term and if you keep fighting for it, they will realize you mean business.

I hope you can find some peace of mind soon. I know how awful it is to need time off and not be able to for one reason or another. I can only send you happy thoughts and wishes for pain-free days
  #7  
Unread 08-10-2005, 04:46 PM
I'm living a nightmare

Hang in there and do the best you can. Some girls are waiting months for their operations, you just have to get through a few weeks. I too had adenomyosis and endometriosis so I understand your pain but did you notice the glorious word in there HAD!! 8 weeks ago and I feel so much better now, things will improve. Until then take it one day or hour at a time. What does your doc have you on to control the pain? Good Luck getting through - sending you hugs!
Aimee
  #8  
Unread 08-10-2005, 08:02 PM
I'm living a nightmare

If I understand the original post, it sounds like the issue here is that your doctor won't give you the doctor's slip saying you should not be working -- am I correct? And without that, of course, your absence will not be excused from work. Whether you use your sick/vacation time or short-term disability benefit, it's the doctor's OK that is holding everything up at this point.

I hope that your doctor reconsiders (as you have rightly requested) and that he changes his mind about recommending that you be off work for a period of time. I'm sorry you're dealing with this.
  #9  
Unread 08-10-2005, 10:41 PM
I'm living a nightmare

I don't have much advice as for the STD. As for the pain, what my dr. did for me was Rx duragesic patches until my surgery Sept 20th. The patches and percocet are the only reasons I can still function (also a scop patch for the nausea) and do my job. I'm sleepy all the time and some days I just plain hurt no matter what. I am so looking forward to getting my life back 'cause even with the meds, I'm pretty limited. Some days (like today) I am just barely functioning.

If you can't resolve the STD, maybe your dr. can at least Rx some strong enough meds to help you at least function?

Rhonda
  #10  
Unread 08-12-2005, 07:13 AM
I'm living a nightmare

Thanks everyone! I prayed more than anything and my prayers were answered. My surgery was moved up ( they had a canx ) to 8/19 and then the OB approved me to be off til then. The more I talked to people, the more I realized that docs are just plain scared to put patients on STD, for whatever reason. Of course, the bottom line is its all about the money but I am not sure if its the paperwork, or the hassles they get from companies pressuring them to get the patient back to work. I am sure it comes from people abusing the system as well. Its such a shame when dealing w/ a major health problem and then the red tape can make things worse. Thanks again for the suggestions and help. I went to the chiropractor and he said if I have problems getting on STD to call him and he'd do it for me! Another avenue I never considered. I am praying for all of you as well!
Thxs!
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