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Who to tell and when Who to tell and when

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  #1  
Unread 10-27-2004, 04:20 PM
Who to tell and when

I have surgery scheduled....my supervisor at work knows, my husband and children and mom and sisters know. Who else "needs" to know?

I don't want people to treat me weired. Has anyone experienced this? When my supervisor told the exec team at work, the director (a gay man) responded, "it's routine surgery now."

I don't know why that honkerblonked me off, I mean, if I said that, it would have been ok, somehow...

I joked back, yeah, it's like getting your tonsils out, but lower. When I told that to my sister, she said getting your tonsils out is worse...

It makes me not want to tell ANYONE.....
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  #2  
Unread 10-27-2004, 04:26 PM
Who to tell and when

Oh, How well I can relate. When I told our landlady that I had this surgery she made the same statement as this being so routine now. It hurt my feelings as if she didn't realize I had just been through a very life altering and major surgery.

I had my tonsils out at the age of 34. I can tell you right now, this surgery is MUCH more than having your tonsils out.

The best thing I have learned is to try not to let anyone else's opinions get into my brain to hurt me. That's why I love hystersisters so much. Everyone here totally understands.

S to you!
  #3  
Unread 10-27-2004, 04:34 PM
Who to tell and when

Routine? Well, perhaps in view of the statistics of death and complications, it might be considered routine, as it is a rather safe surgery, but it sure isn't routine.

No matter what kind of surgery you are having, its going to be at least 4 weeks for basic recovery, and more like 8 for abdominal incisions. AND it may take 6 to 12 months to heal completely internally. And that is only the physical recovery. There is also the emotional and hormonal issues to deal with.

Just tell Mr. Gay that your doctor demands an 8 week recovery...and that is routine.


I hate people who don't get it.
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  #4  
Unread 10-27-2004, 06:33 PM
Who to tell and when

Marlajoy,

When people found out that I was going to be out on disability, they would ask me why. I simply told them "I was having my house gutted"
Alot of people had no idea what I meant.
  #5  
Unread 10-27-2004, 07:13 PM
Who to tell and when

Thanks manalu, I laughed at that one..javascript:smilie('')
LOL.
  #6  
Unread 10-27-2004, 09:45 PM
Who to tell and when

Oh I know how you feel When I was talking to my mother last night she made the comment "Oh Im sure it will be a walk in the park compared to how Ive been feeling lately" (she has a peptic ulcer and when she complains about it she expects you to be totally sympathetic with her) But when she made the walk in the park comment it totally honked me off and hurt my feelings at the same time. I mean.... she's my mother and I wanted a little support and yes some sympathetic concern from her but all I got was insulted
  #7  
Unread 10-27-2004, 10:44 PM
Who to tell and when

I understand also, I was talking to my step mother yesterday and she said well I just don't know what you are going to do because you are going to have to have help and who are you going to get because there isn't anyone. She started telling me that I am in for a lot more then I even realize and that I shouldn't be looking forward to getting it done. She acts like I have a choice in the matter. It's not like I am choosing to get a boob job or something. Then my sister has Lupus and I know that is hard to deal with but my father asks her if she has the money to get her meds and go to the doc and then he said well I want to make sure and take care of YOU because you are the only BABY GIRL I HAVE!!!!!! That hurt my feelings so bad. Maybe it shouldn't have but between this surgery and the liver problems I am at my wits end and then to find out that apparently no one out here plans on helping me with my 4 children or anything after surgery it sure is upseting. Sorry ended up getting some stuff off my chest while typing this. Thanks so much for being here. I love this site.
Kristy
  #8  
Unread 10-27-2004, 10:52 PM
Who to tell and when

I know it's not much, but I'm glad this site is here too, if only to have a place to vent frustrations!!! Hang in there girl, whatever you can do to help yourself and take care of yourself, do it. I don't know how old your kids are, but even a 5 year old can help....
  #9  
Unread 10-27-2004, 11:31 PM
Who to tell and when

It's comments like all of the ones you have written about that makes Hystersisters so very special.

This is the only place where we can vent our frustrations and also find an understanding that we can't find elsewhere.

Thank God for this website and all of you ladies on here. S~Moonchime
  #10  
Unread 10-28-2004, 05:42 AM
Who to tell and when

  Quote:
Originally posted by Moonchime
It's comments like all of the ones you have written about that makes Hystersisters so very special.

This is the only place where we can vent our frustrations and also find an understanding that we can't find elsewhere.

Thank God for this website and all of you ladies on here. S~Moonchime


Ive only been a member here for a few days but Ive come to realize that already.
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