Need to defend decision to have hysterectomy

Sisters, does it happen to you that other women question your decision to go for a hysterectomy due to a very large fibroid? Several times now I had to defend myself. Arguments range from "There are alternatives" to "The sides effects will be worse". I feel a bit annoyed by this. It wasn't an easy decision for me and for 5 years I had suffered in silence and tried so many alternatives. I feel a bit tired of educating others.

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Originally Posted by eente Sisters, does it happen to you that other women question your decision to go for a hysterectomy due to a very large fibroid? Several times now I had to defend myself. Arguments range from "There are alternatives" to "The sides effects will be worse". I feel a bit annoyed by this. It wasn't an easy decision for me and for 5 years I had suffered in silence and tried so many alternatives. I feel a bit tired of educating others.

They don't know what you're going thru. The only ones who can are the ones with a large fibroid (like me) whose decision was what was best for us. I was lucky to have a handful of friends who went thru the same as me, and got wonderful support.
You shouldn't have to justify your decision to anyone. It's your body. You are the one who knows what's best for you.

Simply put it that this was your best option after all else failed.
Unless they ask for education, dont bother with it. They will not appreciate it if they are questioning you to begin with.

Or you say, do you have fibroids? If so what did you do that helped because i tried everything that would be good for me. When they say i have never had one then respond with oh i see and change the subject.
Some women want to be on a high horse till they in fact het called out on their bull.
If they in fact have had a fibroid, tell them im glad that worked for you.

)

You don't have to justify your decision to have a hysterectomy to anyone.

Anybody who has had a hysterectomy knows that it is major surgery with a long recovery - it is not undertaken lightly.

No. I flatly refused to defend myself.

"Are you my doctor? Then I don't really care to hear your advice or opinion."

I don't give a hoot if they think I'm rude. They are the rude ones, pretending to know my experience and what's best for me.

People like that can kiss my behind!

Yes, I felt that way toward my niece but my mind was made up. Still, it bugged me that she wasn't being supportive. After that conversation, I felt deflated and angry. So, I just focused on people that were with me and not against me.

I'm sorry that you are having to deal with that.

That is a lousy position to be put in! Say the conversation does go their way, do they expect you to say "yes, I see your point, let's go get that uterus put back in!" (Assuming we're talking after hysteroctomy). If it is before the procedure simply respond something to the affect of "I've discussed the options with my doctor/surgeon and this is what we believe to be the best option for my situation. Thank you for your concern, but your opinion in not needed to make this informed decision".

Remember, opinions are like buttholes, everyone has one.

Huggs

The best way to get around this is to be very careful about who you tell. Everyone doesn't need to know. I told only my husband, one of my sisters and one friend. Didn't even tell my parents until I was home from the hospital. If you don't open a discussion, people can't give you "advice".