Upcoming surgery

I have a surgery for a total hysterectomy in Jan. So not looking forward to it and have so many questions still. I really want a second opinion if this is absolutely necessary. I don't want to lose a part of myself. I'm already sad about it and cry often. I was diagnosed with HPV and the way my gyn is talking it's a life and death situation. I feel like she is trying to scare me and yea it worked but I need to be totally sure that a hysterectomy is the only option I have.
Any advice?

You're on the right track...if you are not happy with the choice then go get a second opinion. You are your best advocate and sometimes that means stepping up and exploring more than one option.

And everyone has very individual feelings/thoughts about their reproductive organs. What I can say is this...I'm 3 years down the road after my hysterectomy and 2 years after my ovaries were taken out...I feel no less of a woman now than I did with all the reproductive organs

Definitely get a second opinion, sounds like you should for peace of mind. I would in your shoes.

For me personally I wasn't affected emotionally. Never wanted kids so that was actually a plus for me. My anxieties were all surgery related like the IV, a lifelong fear.

Seek out the answers you need, that's so important. Don't be afraid to ask a million questions.

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Originally Posted by halosshadow You're on the right track...if you are not happy with the choice then go get a second opinion. You are your best advocate and sometimes that means stepping up and exploring more than one option. And everyone has very individual feelings/thoughts about their reproductive organs. What I can say is this...I'm 3 years down the road after my hysterectomy and 2 years after my ovaries were taken out...I feel no less of a woman now than I did with all the reproductive organs

That is a big fear I have of not feeling "whole". Did you have your cervix removed as well? I am bipolar, manic depressive, and SEVERE anxiety. I worry losing that part of me will screw with those in a bad way. Hormones and all that. It's good to hear it was a positive experience for you. I get lost in what questions to ask.

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Originally Posted by RiseAgainst Definitely get a second opinion, sounds like you should for peace of mind. I would in your shoes. For me personally I wasn't affected emotionally. Never wanted kids so that was actually a plus for me. My anxieties were all surgery related like the IV, a lifelong fear. Seek out the answers you need, that's so important. Don't be afraid to ask a million questions.

I have 4 kids and I'm so done! They are 16,14,12,10. I definitely do not want more. Emotional wise it's the losing a piece of me. The surgery of course is freakin me out.
Any pointers on what I should ask about?

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Originally Posted by Part.of.me I have 4 kids and I'm so done! They are 16,14,12,10. I definitely do not want more. Emotional wise it's the losing a piece of me. The surgery of course is freakin me out. Any pointers on what I should ask about?

Oh, you have your hands full then! haha I get how you're feeling. Reading my pathology report was a trip, knowing those organs were mine. I would advise asking a new doctor if this is indeed your best (or only) option for your situation and then take it from there.

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Originally Posted by RiseAgainst Oh, you have your hands full then! haha I get how you're feeling. Reading my pathology report was a trip, knowing those organs were mine. I would advise asking a new doctor if this is indeed your best (or only) option for your situation and then take it from there.

Thank you!

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Originally Posted by Part.of.me That is a big fear I have of not feeling "whole". Did you have your cervix removed as well? I am bipolar, manic depressive, and SEVERE anxiety. I worry losing that part of me will screw with those in a bad way. Hormones and all that. It's good to hear it was a positive experience for you. I get lost in what questions to ask.

The best thing you can do is write down all your questions as you think of them. You are not wrong in asking questions...having a hysterectomy is major surgery that can have long term effects, some of them not always good. So the better prepared you are, the better you will feel about whatever choice you make.

My cervix is gone too...I have nothing left. I had to go through surgical menopause and I won't lie to you, emotionally that got a bit hairy at times...talk about explosions of temper. But my hormones leveled out after going on hrt and eventually I weaned myself off the hormones.

I still suffer from complications but I caused them by doing too much too soon. Many complications can be avoided by taking it very easy the first 6 weeks. This is major surgery, after all.

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Originally Posted by halosshadow The best thing you can do is write down all your questions as you think of them. You are not wrong in asking questions...having a hysterectomy is major surgery that can have long term effects, some of them not always good. So the better prepared you are, the better you will feel about whatever choice you make. My cervix is gone too...I have nothing left. I had to go through surgical menopause and I won't lie to you, emotionally that got a bit hairy at times...talk about explosions of temper. But my hormones leveled out after going on hrt and eventually I weaned myself off the hormones. I still suffer from complications but I caused them by doing too much too soon. Many complications can be avoided by taking it very easy the first 6 weeks. This is major surgery, after all.

Wow. I appreciate the honesty. That is surely a concern is the hormones being off I don't want to freak out on anyone. So I should immediately address the hormonal aspect. I feel like I'm going into this with a book of questions. I also hear so many woman have unsatisfing sex lives after the surgery which I'm not looking forward to losing that. I'm not in a relationship now but I'd like to have a fullfilling one at some point so this will negatively affect that. Sucks. I'm very subborn so I suppose I need to have a support group after the surgery. Because I like you will try to do too much too soon.

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Originally Posted by Part.of.me Wow. I appreciate the honesty. That is surely a concern is the hormones being off I don't want to freak out on anyone. So I should immediately address the hormonal aspect. I feel like I'm going into this with a book of questions. I also hear so many woman have unsatisfing sex lives after the surgery which I'm not looking forward to losing that. I'm not in a relationship now but I'd like to have a fullfilling one at some point so this will negatively affect that. Sucks. I'm very subborn so I suppose I need to have a support group after the surgery. Because I like you will try to do too much too soon.

I think people expect their sex lives to be different because that's what they hear. My orgasms have changed but they are still good and since it's been 3 years, I barely remember what they were like before. I'd say the only thing that has changed dramatically was that I used to produce plenty of my own lubrication. Now I don't produce any, which is a pain as we found the best lube for us was KY Jelly but they have stopped selling it in New Zealand, from what I can tell.

Here's the thing...the best thing you can do for yourself is take each day as it comes. If that annoys people or annoys you, you just have to understand that this is what's right for you, if you do decide to go through with it.