I'm depressed

I am a bit depressed and have been for four days. People keep telling me why I am depressed..I've gotton, 'oh you miss your uterus' (no I don't!!!) 'oh you are now in the fall of your life' (who cares I love fall!) and all these other reasons for my depression and I just don't know why but I do burst into tears all the time, and wander around aimlessly around the house.

My support system at home rots. My dd was upset that she had to do 'everything' so I started (right away) to help with dinner, I walk the dog around the block, dh wondered why I didn't want to go grocery shopping, or go to the mall. 'Lets buy a new outfit'. (grrr! Like anything with an elastic waist that is baggy please!) I go to the bank, walk to the post office because I need to do these things because no one else will do it for me because they all feel I need to get a grip and get on with it so I can get back to work.

I just get more and more depressed. Dh is leaving next weekend to go up north (of the state) to do some business and I will be stuck for the weekend without a car/not that I can drive of course... having to walk the dog and do everything else. Why bother to have a LOA and convelence when I have been thrust into the field so to speak.

The only way I am going to rest is if something rips, I bleed and end up in the ICU. Which I hope doesn't happen but again that is the only way I 'will' get out of having to walk the dog until I come home (again).

I called my doctor but not much she can do. *sigh*

I hate my life.

W.

wings1958:

I am so sorry you are so down. Can I ask what your surgery entailed? Did you also have your ovaries removed?

I just had my uterus removed. I had the Laproscopy so in a way, it is easier to recover from so I should probably not complain and fuss about anything. It is probably no big deal really to have this done. I'll be ok. I'll get the paper work to go back to work and then I won't have to deal with the laundry and the dog.....I just have to laugh at the list of do's and don'ts my doctor gave because it doesn't mean anything at home.

I think your post outlines perfectly why you are depressed.

My personal opinion is that too many of us have a hysterectomy, lose our ovaries, are forced to sit still for a while during recovery, and during that quiet time, we reflect upon what in our lives really suck. And we get depressed by the reality of it all.

I'd bet that if your daughter had been friendlier, more loving and more helpful during your recovery, you wouldn't be depressed.

If your DH was not leaving and was instead staying home to be of a bit more support to you, you probably wouldn't be depressed.

It's not your lack of ovaries...it's your family. I hope you can get them to help you more. <<hugs>>

I had the same surgery 5 years ago....it is a big deal. Just because you have small incisions doesn't mean you don't need time to heal or that it wasn't major surgery. I did not have depression issues but everyone is totally different. This site is a tremendous help and source of information. I don't know what your home life is like, and forgive me for being forward, but perhaps you need to sit your family down and let them know you are still recovering and need their help and support both mentally and physically. Removing internal body parts is a big thing and you are not going to recover overnight and you certainly do not want to over do it because you can cause yourself some serious harm by doing that. You have every right to complain and fuss. We are all here to listen and support each other. Is there someone out of the house, a close friend, etc. that can help you?

Hang in there, happy days will be back again

Hugs!

Hi Wings58,

I also had a laparoscopic hyst and I agree with the other ladies. A laparoscopic hyst is a less invasive hyst and it is still *major* surgery. You might look great on the outside...and you are still healing on the inside. You need time to heal like other ladies....so please do not rush your recovery.

You are only (10) days post-op and in the scheme of things...that is not very long. All Hyster Sisters...no matter what type of hyst they had...have only one chance to get it right with their recovery. And that includes you. This needs to be your Post-op Princess time.

I might suggest you sit down with your family and outline what your surgery entailed..and that you need their help right now. I am sure if any of them just had major surgery...you would be waiting on them hand and foot. You deserve this time to heal and your family needs to fully understand that. You don't need to overdo it right now. If some activity sounds like too much...it probably is. Rest and taking it easy is what is best. You have plenty of time to get back to your normal activities after you recover.

Sending best wishes~

Mary

I totally agree with Mary. I remember even though my incisions looked great on the outside, I was so tired and even taking a shower sometime made me want to go back to bed. It took me about 4 weeks to completely feel like myself again, so please don't rush yourself.

Please take time to recover; remember the dr was "moving, shaking and removing" things inside of you and that is not something you will bounce back from in a few days. So please take our advice and talk to your family; you may even find that takes some of your stress away.

Hugs!