Issues at almost 2 weeks post-op

I'm having issues too girls. I'll be two weeks post-op on Tues Feb 5th and have had just about enough of everyone around me. My poor husband doesn't know whether to s**t or wind his watch most days. My ex and I exchange visits with our daughter every two weeks. There are 3 states between us and a 6-7 hour road trip with the exchange and the jerk refused to give my daughter back for my visit time because my new husband was going to pick her up alone due to my newly post-op status. So you guessed it, I just spent 6 hours in the car with my sore belly. Also we recently made the decision to move back to where we are orginally from in two weeks so there has been a lot of running to do to get ready for that...and to top it all off his b****h exwife who has done everything in her power to make things as difficult as possible is now asking that we keep all the kids (5 girls total) for 4 days next week cause she needs to go on a business trip. My husband, of course, wants to see as much of his kids as possible before we move, so I get to be the bad guy as to why they can't stay that long BUT DAMMIT!!! I JUST HAD AN 8 INCH INCISION CUT INTO MY ABDOMEN AND MY UTERUS REMOVED!! When does it become MY time to have quiet and heal? My hospital experience was horrendous, I can't sleep and have to pee every two hours. I got a monster yeast infection from 2g of antibx daily for a week after surgery and shock of shocks..I've started bleeding vaginally. Emotional doesn't come close to what I feel. My ex was not capable of giving me children so the only child I have is adopted. The only pregnancy I've ever experienced ended in miscarriage at 10 weeks and had I known I would never get the chance to carry a child I probably wouldn't have been as sexually responsible while I was dating. Most the time I handle all this OK, but the recent hormonal shifts have made all of it a lot to deal with and moody doesn't even come close to describing me. I'm venting..sorry everybody....36 y/o with 6 kids, gave birth to none of them (talk about a biological slap in the face) had TAH 1/22/08, but left both ovaries and tubes...thanks.

Hi bradbrigade!

It sounds like you have been through a lot and that's shame. From reading posts on this site for five years, I have concluded that hysterectomy recovery (particularly in the early stage) can be challenging for many of us...it might be in different ways, but it seems like lots of us have bad days mixed with the good.

I hope that life is better for you in the weeks, months and years ahead. Try to hang in there!

Many s and Best Wishes,

Sending you a major hang on hug and some prayers. Wow, I wouldn't know what to say in a situation like that.

You go ahead and vent away girl. You deserve it. I'm here to listen.

Wow, you sure do have a lot to deal with Bradbrigade! I'll be sending up some peaceful vibes your way, sounds like you all could use them. Is there any way you can slow down your move?

We're here to listen and offer our shoulders...please try to take it easy, you dont' want to get worse.

Wow that is way too much to be dealing with. You only get to heal once. Before having the surgery, your ex and his ex should have been advised that you will not be well enough to do anything for an extended period of time. This way there is no misunderstanding as to what role you will be playing in the children's lives until you heal. This is definitely not fair to you, especially now since not only are you dealing with the surgery itself, but mentally as well.

I wish you all the best in this and some resolve. You take care of you and remember right now you can not be the martyr.

Wow!!! I also have no words of wisdom for you. Sending you a hug and hoping that the "girls" cooperate and help you out. This all makes my little bumps in the road disappear.

Kay

I'm sorry it has been so difficult for you. I know that i am 2 weeks post op and I have been thru alot of different emotions so this is an especially trying time. I hope it all evens out for you over the next few weeks. You have to take time for yourself to heal and find some ways to make yourself happy before worrying about everyone else. I know my family is getting a bit tired of taking on the chores i cant do but I also know that ive overdone it because of this reason and ive paid for it in pain. Please find something that makes you happy and indulge. Take time to pamper yourself each day no matter what. This is your time to heal. I wish you the best of luck. You deserve it!

I have some experience of ex's playing politics with children - one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with. Guilt is the big player...

They aren't out to make your life easier are they? Try not to take it personally, take a step back and look at the practical side of all this...what can you cope with and learn to say a clear no..

I have 3 step children, and love them very much - have learnt that you don't have to give birth to a child to have pride, love and emotional ties..you know that. You sound like an amazing woman, keeping so many balls in the air at this difficult time

...I would say it's time your DH stepped up, protected and supported you
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