going back to "life"

I was reading in the "journey through land of hyster", at least i think that is where I read it, at how Kathy felt like a child entering the world again after her surgery. I can relate to that.

Even though my recovery seems so slow, and I am so anxious to get back to my life, or, my new life, I should say, I am a bit hesitant too. Part of my feels like, since i have been out of my "ministry" areas so long, that I am kind of starting over, you know? I wonder will I just pick up where I left off? or will there be an adjustment of sorts.

Area's where I was "in charge" are now being handled by others, will they want me to take back over or is it time to relinquish those responsibilities and find something new? Area's that have changed considerably in the last 4 weeks, will i fit in? Will I be treated with kid gloves, or be expected to just jump back in full throttle?

I do think I have become more deliberate, more thinking because of all this. More, is this activity really worth my time and energy? Is this really where God has called me to minister, or was I just doing it cause i always have? I do plan to attend services this week, and still feel kind of vulnerable, like I want to be protected. My sweet hubby will be there to run me home if I just can not stay.

Part of me wants to rush ahead back into all the wonderful things I was doing, but another part wants to linger and wait and watch a bit longer.....

	Quote:
Originally Posted by LovetheOcean and still feel kind of vulnerable, like I want to be protected.

You are darling. From your post, I take it you are a woman of God. While it's wonderful to have family here and now to give us the physical protection, you know who's there for the soul protecting.

I am really glad you posted this. For years now I've ran and hid and argued that I was fine on my own. Through many trials I've come to see I need a little more than just me. I realize things are a lot bigger and I need something more for my inner being.

I'm so scared too. I feel like I'm slow on recovery, but I feel better. Then putting away a few shirts and socks kicks my butt! Then I wonder "Am I ever going to be ready again?" And that scares me.

For now, I will dream of beaches and cold drinks. Sunsets and tasty cakes.

And you'll be right beside me. Have faith, dear. Sometimes it's the only glue we have (and need)

oh for the feel of sand between my toes and the ocean breeze in my hair, and the sound of waves breaking on the shore! A little taste of heaven, especially in the evening as the sun is going down.

Oh! Your thoughts sound like mine! I have noticed the hardest part of the sugery is letting go and letting my family take over. I have always been the one to do everything around the house and I have been amazed how wonderful my family can take care of things. Sometimes, I think God allows us an opportunity to take a step back and realize how amazing and wonderful our family and friends can be! Before the surgery, I was going through a time where I felt like I was just getting taken for granted. I know now that part of that feeling was because I had been so sick and run down and I did not let anyone do anything for me. I wanted to do it all myself. Since I have had to step back and let others take over, I have realized that I have many people around me who love and care about me. I know that God has taken care of me during this time and I am so thankful that He allowed me time to step back and realize how wonderful my family and friends are!