My Turn to Freak Out

serenity 10, Thanks for your support & understanding. After my husband left my Dr. appt that he'd went to with me, my female Dr. said-you know its hard for someone that don't have bad (almost 5yrs) pap tests to understand how you feel, & it's really hard for someone that don't have the same equipment as us to REALLY understand-that made me chuckle a little. I wish you the best of luck & will be saying a few little prayers for you. By the way, I did buy a 2 ft. tree tonight & decorated it! Made me smile. Merry Christmas to me. Keep in touch--sunshine#1

Yes, we're here, I'd never even heard the word hyperplasia until the beginning of this year when I was referred to the specialist because of pain in the left ovary which turned out to be a very large cyst. Because of irregularities with my periods, he decided to do a biopsy and it came back with the hyperplasia which was a completely separate thing from what was going on with the cyst. I guess it's a good thing it was found but I haven't been enjoying those lovely biopsies in his office every couple of months (ugghhh). My biopsies have been middle of the road up to the highest level before cancer so he decided it was time to do something about it before it does turn cancerous. We tried the medication route to regulate my cycles but that didn't work and it made me quite sick, so thus the hysterectomy to get me all straightened out. I see you're booked for the 11th, I'm on the 12th and our other triplet is on the 13th something like that, so I"ll be thinking of you and wishing you best of luck. I'm trying to remind myself to take it one day at a time and remain calm, but I seem to be doing a lot of freaking out. I do love this site and all the sisters on it.

I know exactly what you mean. When I was getting ready for my TAH I felt so much anxiety. I hadn't had surgery since I was a kid, and getting bombarded with all the literature/medical advice/personal advice was overwhelming. I had to have the surgery but that didn't help me feel any better. The main thing that did help me was trying to separate normal pre-op anxiety from anxiety specifically related to the TAH. I found that once I started doing that it was much easier for me to deal with each cause, instead of them all getting lumped into one big, intimidating mass. Once I started looking at my situation rationally I could get out of my feelings/emotions into my brain (about the only thing I felt was still functioning properly) so I felt more in control of what was happening. That sense of being at the mercy of events was difficult to handle in and of itself and compounded everything else. I also voiced my fears to my doctor and family instead of keeping them inside like I usually do.

In my opinion it's logical to be nervous, and both your body and mind are under a great deal of stress right now. If you can accept that it may help you to deal with all the confusion.

Hi Triplets!

Well, yesterday, I talked to an onoclogist who told me that, after looking at the slides of all the hyperplasia biopsies, he didn't feel that I had it! This would make myeomectomy a possibility. So I then contacted a doctor who does robotic myomectomies, and he felt I would be a good candidate. So, at the 11th hour, I was freaking out and second-guessing, etc. However, I still have a bad fibroid problem that must be addressed.

I got on some of the fibroid websites, and saw how these women were goign round and round with treatments, trials, etc. It just sounded so excrutiatingly drawn out.

I then called the office of the surgeon/gynecologist who is going to do my surgery Tuesday. He is such a sweetheart! He called me in-between surgeries, and took the time to talk to me about it. I told him all that had taken place. He said he would do a myomectomy if I wanted, but then he told me his honest opinion: he said, "If you were my wife, I would tell you to have the hysterectomy." He went on to explain about the greater risks of infection, pain, return of fibroids, etc, if I were to go for a myomectomy. As I am 44, I only have about a 5% chance of becoming pregnant anyway. The want of having my only family was the thing holding me back. I looked at the whole package, and I decided that I couldn't drag this out any more. I want my life back again. I decided to go ahead with the hysterectomy and accept that a family may come to me another way.

I work at a college, and later in the day, one of the young people I used to work with, who knows about my surgery, emailed a most amazing story. When this young man was 16, he went to Guatalamala and worked in an orphanage. He told me how he saw a 2 yr old picking through a garbage dump looking for food. He said that right then and there, he decided that rather than having his own children, he wanted to adopt them. It was so inspiring to hear him tell of his experience, that there still may be hope for me to have an amazing family and work a miricle for somebody in need. It gave me a lot of peace.

So now, I am gettting my house ready and going forward. I know it will be hard, but I have had an increase in physical symptoms lately, and I am afraid if I don't take this thing out now, I be in for a lot of trouble down the road. I don't need that. I am choosing what I feel is the best possibility for my health, which is already at risk from another neoplasm.

That's my pre-op struggle and story. Thanks everyone for listening!

Hello Serenity 10,
I am 2 weeks postop with a TAH/bladder sling. I'm so glad I did it! my story sounds very much like yours. I was in the hospital for 4 days It wasn't that bad! I had a cath for 2 days until my bladder decided to start working. I'm a 44 year teacher with years of endo issues and I have to say...why did I wait so long to do this! Ladies...forge ahead and get that hyster over with! I'm feeling better that before my surgery except for tender incision and tiredness. I was freaked out too...they thought I might have breast cancer on top of the 24 day period. My hormones were in overtime! With everything gone (even ovaries) I already feel much better. I went to a male Dr for years who convinced me to "keep all your body parts" . A dear friend
insisted that I try her female Dr. and 2 months later I had a TAH. I was having periods every 10 days lasting for up to 24 days. I'm 2 weeks out and don't even need a panty shield! Pretty liberating from someone who kept the tampon and pad industry booming! Ladies, in my experience it was well worth it! No more periods and daily pain. I had some rough days at the beginning but now I can honestly say I feel better than I have felt in years! I have no ovaries or hormones so am very surprised! Hope you are feeling better soon! Karen