I just feel ugly.

My skin dried out, my hair dried out, my belly is huge. Nothing hurts but sex is kinda lame because I'm afraid to do anything too rough. I got terminated at work bc I'm. Not covered by the family leave law. Finding a new job is going to be interesting bc all I can wear is leggings. I'm trying to be great full because 1. I woke up from surgery and 2. I don't need chemo or anything but holy crow am I depressed. I had no idea my whole life was going to change like this. Sorry to be a whiner but I can't tell anyone else.

I had surgery two weeks before you. Had second cat scan due to excessive swelling in belly. It does make you feel terrible. I feel your pain. So sorry you lost your job. Leggings and long tunics with boots is what many suggest. What type of work so you do? Maybe we can come up with ideas.

I am so sorry you feel this way and can not believe you lost your job, that just couldn't happen in Australia , there would be hell to pay for your employers here. I felt like that this week too, so arranged someone to take me to get my nails done earlier in the week, it is amazing what a bit of silly colour can do for your spirits, then yesterday snuck out by myself and had my hair done. Today put on a full face of make up and I feel like a new women. I think it's time to pamper yourself a bit.:: :friend
Number 1 lesson going through this: look after yourself.

The swelly belly *will* eventually go away. Mine took about six months. In the meantime, look into hair and skincare products designed for use by older women, gentle stuff with lots and lots of moisturizers.

Hugs and many prayers your way

Eucerin or cetaphil cream (in a tub--not lotion) has been a lifesaver. I agree on pampering. Great idea.

I feel the same way! I had surgery in Aug and my skin has dried out, my hair fell out around my temples (I have to do layers now to hide it) and my swelly belly is mostly food related, but there none the less and I cant fit my old clothes. I developed some lymphedema from my belly button to my calves. I can mostly control it was lymphatic massage and walking in the pool if I make sure not to be on my feet or sitting much 2 days in a row. I havent had more than 3 hrs straight sleep since getting off the strong pain meds, mostly because of night sweats. I keep getting hints from friends and family that I need to work (my son turned 16 so this is the last month for SS death benefits, which wasnt much to begin with) I cant figure out how I am supposed to work, when I cant sit or stand 2 days in a row! Most of my time, besides my household/kid/elderly parent duties seems to be spent managing the lymphedema and staying off my feet...lol! I did buy a tablet so I can work on ebay from my bed/recliner! I do have good days though, just hard to make plans because I never know when they will be and I can see the humor, so its got to get better right?

I am so sorry for what you are going through. I also ended up losing my job in a large part due to the fact that I continued to have medical problems after the surgery. It really hurt at the time but now looking back, I found a better job with better people who are more understanding. It felt so bad at the time but it did work out. As you continue to heal, you will start to feel better and that should help. Have you talked to your doc about your depression? I recently had three knee surgeries for a wound and was so depressed that I was crying non-stop. It was so bad that when I called to make the appointment I was crying!! My doc prescribed me a low dose anti depressant which has made a huge difference..I think that sometimes everything just hits us at once and it is overwhelming. At least it was for me. I hope things improve for you. Sending hugs

Thank you everyone. I hadn't considered lymph edema hmm. Maybe that's kart of it. I've been trying to pamper myself but geez I'm tired off spending my money on leggings and flat shoes. I got my toes done. I charged a bunch of new moisturizer. I tried to fight the ugly but I don't have a lot of money and it looks like the ugly won. I don't even know what I do for work any more. I was a bookkeeper but I left bc it's just not me. I started to go back for a masters in psych and got a job in retail trying to "find myself" and now I'm even more lost. Yes. It is overwhelming. Maybe there's an opportunity in here somewhere. If I could only but on pants to go find it.