2nd guessing my decisions, need support.

I'm suppose to go for my 2nd mesh revision surgery Nov.1. 2011 but I keep questioning my decision. Obviously with the first decision to have mesh put in me in the 1st place was a bad one, then the 2nd surgery didn't fix anything, now what's going to happen with the 3rd? I still have 2 areas of mesh sticking out and a mesh arm or band of something that's not normal but yet at the same time, these last 3 weeks I have felt the most normal/ healthy than I have since my original surgery. I'm scared of going in and getting worse. I'm trying t o convince myself that if I don't go in for surgery I will always be abnormal and at risk for infection with the mesh being part in part out, but the other part of me is saying if you can stay where youre at right now who cares about that little bit of mesh, hubby can't feel it anymore, the pain has decreased considerably and you're getting better it's just a psychological thing you have to get over like having a huge mole on your face that you want to get rid of, but really it's not hurting you. It is different though, I've been sick with UTI's since my first surgery and ski from all the antibiotics.
Am I just delaying the inevitable if I don't have the surgery now? Wahhhh I'm scared.

I'm sorry you have had so many problems. I hope this is your final surgery and your problems are resolved. I also had Elevate installed last Jan. I will be praying that everything turns out well for you.