Being pulled in every direction

I've had some minor complications since my surgery and still have 2 more weeks before I'm actually released. That'll put me at 9 weeks.

I still have SO much to do that needs to be done like yesterday.

I STILL haven't taken DS to get his school supplies and we have to go meet his teacher today!! He starts 1st grade Monday. I went & got his clothes... still need a backpack.

DS needs me to go over some stuff for his work. My mom asked me to figure out her portfolio & finances ~ she needs me to set up a budget for her. Our neice just had ANOTHER baby who is not doing well & she's asked for help with him.

I'm just now starting to get my energy back and finally beginning to see & feel the benefits of having my hyst. Now I feel like everyone is expecting me to jump cuz they need something. I already feel like I'm spreading myself too thin. I tried to explain to my mother in law that I'm still recovering and haven't been released yet but she isn't being very understanding ~ go figure.

So other than telling everyone to lose my phone # , how am I supposed to get them to leave me alone. Seriously, these are grown people who should be able to take care of this stuff themselves. All I'm doing is getting <Oops! Please do not try to bypass the website censor.>. Any suggestions?

Just learn to say "NO". That's a hard thing to do sometimes, but you need to take care of yourself first. I too used to be the go-to person for my entire family. I'm older now and have learned how liberating that little word can be. Just make it sound like you would love to help them, but you can barely get the things done that you need to do.

Good luck!

I am a person who tries to avoid conflict so I say just dont answer the phone. You gotta take care of you~~~

GA

Hey Cassidy, I would love to chat with you. I think you need to be straight with them and tell them you have not fully recovered and need more time. If they don't understand that is their problem. You are a wonderful person who is caring and always offering support to these ladies on this website. If they don't understand who cares. As far as your son is concerned. You can always order online. Take it easy and send me an instant message. Love, Annette

Hi cassidy- Say NO. If that doesn't work, Start asking everyone else for help. Tell your mom to watch your neices kids and ask the niece to take your son for his school supplies. Start asking everyone else to do things for u then maybe they will get the hint that you are unable to help them. Hope this gives you an idea
your sis Tamaralea aka tamja

I could never say no...until I had this surgery! This recovery has kicked my hiney...it is such a looooong journey! The first couple of months, my body was using every ounce of energy I had to do it's healing thing! I had no choice but to learn the word "no" and add it to my vocabulary! I barely had enough energy to take care of me, work, and my home. You need to learn to ask all of them to start helping *you*! And, if you have caller ID, you can screen your phone calls. It is time to for you to put yourself first...this is all about *you*!

Please practice this... n (pause) o , n (pause) o
Very slowly now...say it with me: n (pause) o
Now...put them together: no

Now, practice until you get it right! Once you learn it, it gets easier. Best wishes! And, remember, you are still a princess! Get some rest!

No is a complete sentence
Marg

I agree with the advice to say no.

Meeting your son's teacher actually sounds like the only thing that needs to be done now by YOU.

Good luck!

Sounds like everyone pulling you in every direction has no idea what a major surgery this is. And educating them is not really your job.

When I began researching how to deal with the endo a year ago, the best advice I read was to "do what you can when you can, and learn how to say no to everything else." And I would add.....learn how to say no to everyONE else AND their insensitivity!

Please take care of yourself and listen only to your body and to those who are providing the support you need and deserve right now.

Blessings to you!
~kristen~

Cassidy,
listen to this - you know, I had to say 'no' to a friend who felt like she was having a breakdown and needed to talk. I told her that I couldn't do it today, that I needed to rest. She was mad at me for 2 weeks but didn't say anything, acted like everything was okay, then last night she walked up to me and said, 'you know, I was mad at you for telling me I couldn't come over, but then I realized that you were just taking care of yourself, and I'm sorry for even getting mad.'

Sometimes you have to put yourself first, and you do owe it to your body to rest and to have peace of mind. The others can pick up the slack and be grown-ups for awhile, don't you agree?
clf626