Im new, surgery was yesterday!

First I wanted to say hello to everyone and thank everyone for all the wonderful posts, I dont feel so alone now. I have been researching everything possible on here. I have never posted so here is my story.......

Im 26, and I have two girls, 6&9. After the birth of my first, my problems started. I have had 5 laparoscopies for endo, cysts, and adhesions. In 2003, I had my tubes tied because I was sure I didnt want anymore children. I married my husband in 2005 and we decided last year that we did want another baby. So back in for a reversal, which was a horrible experience. Since then, we've tried patiently waiting and fertility drugs which caused cysts and another lap. Ive also been on birth control for most of the time since the reversal. So my chances of concieving looked very dim. And after months of pain, I decided it was time for the LCH. It was a very difficult decision for me to make because Ive felt like I was taking our only chance away. My husband has been very supportive and convinced me that having me out of pain was more important now. So I did it. It wasnt that bad. The nurses were wonderful. They gave me a morphine pump but everytime I pushed the button, I got sick. So I had them discontiue it. I've only had two lortabs since last night and Im feeling pretty ok. And its wierd, cause the pain from the surgery is not anywhere near the pain I was experiencing before. Everyone is telling me Im doing too much but its hard to just lay around. (im not really doing that much) As far as emotional, I think Im a little numb right now, maybe it hasnt set in yet. I dont know whether to feel relief or guilt. Was I too selfish to just give up? Will I be ok months from now or will I burst into tears everytime I see a newborn? Ive had other family support but I really just want to be alone right now. But the phone calls and visits keep coming. My sister brought her 2 month old to visit tonight, and all I could think was how soon I could go lay down. Sorry Im rambling, I know that many of you have experienced these feelings, so thank you for listening. Maybe Ill be able to process better over the next few days. And hopefully I can sleep better tonight. Much love to everyone

Welcome! Rest up and come visit us often! Take Care, you are a princess!

Hi SW33T and

so happy to hear you are doing fine you have a wonderful hubby that cares for you. dont do too much, even though you might feel great in the outside, in the inside you are still healing...take your time and

Remember the pain meds your on make you think you are fine and can get up and do things...but later when the meds are gone your body will tell you otherwise. PLEASE be very careful and don't do anything for a few weeks and then gradually start doing a little. Remember you only have one chance to heal correctly.

GOOD LUCK!

Welcome to the other side! You MUST pamper the princess! To heal correctly we have to follow our doctors' orders! Before you know it that old pain will be a distant memory! And you are not selfish for not wanting to be in pain! As women I think we tend to take on many burdens, more than we should, but it's just the way we are. Most of us have this surgery because we have got to the point where we just can't take the pain anymore! You will have to be firm with people that although you appreciate their kindness you are not up to any visiting. You have had a major surgery and resting is the best way for us to heal. We hope you come here often for support!

	Quote:
Originally Posted by SW33T First I wanted to say hello to everyone and thank everyone for all the wonderful posts, I dont feel so alone now. I have been researching everything possible on here. I have never posted so here is my story....... Im 26, and I have two girls, 6&9. After the birth of my first, my problems started. I have had 5 laparoscopies for endo, cysts, and adhesions. In 2003, I had my tubes tied because I was sure I didnt want anymore children. I married my husband in 2005 and we decided last year that we did want another baby. So back in for a reversal, which was a horrible experience. Since then, we've tried patiently waiting and fertility drugs which caused cysts and another lap. Ive also been on birth control for most of the time since the reversal. So my chances of concieving looked very dim. And after months of pain, I decided it was time for the LCH. It was a very difficult decision for me to make because Ive felt like I was taking our only chance away. My husband has been very supportive and convinced me that having me out of pain was more important now. So I did it. It wasnt that bad. The nurses were wonderful. They gave me a morphine pump but everytime I pushed the button, I got sick. So I had them discontiue it. I've only had two lortabs since last night and Im feeling pretty ok. And its wierd, cause the pain from the surgery is not anywhere near the pain I was experiencing before. Everyone is telling me Im doing too much but its hard to just lay around. (im not really doing that much) As far as emotional, I think Im a little numb right now, maybe it hasnt set in yet. I dont know whether to feel relief or guilt. Was I too selfish to just give up? Will I be ok months from now or will I burst into tears everytime I see a newborn? Ive had other family support but I really just want to be alone right now. But the phone calls and visits keep coming. My sister brought her 2 month old to visit tonight, and all I could think was how soon I could go lay down. Sorry Im rambling, I know that many of you have experienced these feelings, so thank you for listening. Maybe Ill be able to process better over the next few days. And hopefully I can sleep better tonight. Much love to everyone

Bless your heart your so young. I'm feeling some guilt also about not being able to have more kids. I knew I was done. I have 4 but the man I am with now has none of his own. I just wish I could have gave him one. Sometimes I feel like I jumped into this too soon.