My First Post...Any one battling depression and fatigue???

Hello everyone!

I am happy to be here, this is like a must-have for all hysterectomy patients!!

A little about me, I am a 45 year old HysterSister, divorced, no partner at this time, single with two wonderful teenage boys (they live with their father in another town during the week for school, here all other times if they want to be); I do miss them immensely as they are becoming busier and busier in their teen lives. I have a wonderful relationship with my boys and cherish the times we do have together. I am presently unemployed due to illness; Depression, Anxiety, Adenomyosis, had a TAH with all removed.

This is my first post and I want to thank all of the Hyster Sisters for sharing all their experiences and information...It has really really helped me to read all and get through this...I joined and started reading on day one of my week 2 and now I check for new posts almost everyday...So many of my questions have been answered!! Thanks to everyone I do not feel quite so alone and that what I am experiencing is normal.

Physically I am feeling better except fatigue and some achiness ... but battling a worsening condition I already have...Chronic Depression and an Anxiety Disorder...I have battled this for many many years now and on antidepressants but it seems since the surgery the depression and fatigue has gotten and is getting worse; I am getting some anxiety, usually around having to go anywhere outside the house and around financial situation.

Is anyone experienceing fatigue and depression getting worse?? Could it be just from the surgery or the fact that I am into surgical menopause?? Or is it my life being in a rut and the regular depression causing this??

My sleep schedule seems to have turned itself backwards as I have hot flashes it seems every ten minutes or so during the night and toss and turn, cannot get comfortable, and my mind wont shut up!! After battling all night I finally fall into a deeper sleep in the morning when I am supposed to be getting up...and that just adds to the depression and fatigue! Does it get better? I was told I would have more energy after the surgery...am hoping to feel like a normal human being and exercise and lose weight...

I have my 6 week post op next Monday so looking forward to asking doc what may be going on.

Thanks ladies for reading and looking forward to conversing with you and hopefully offer my support in future!

Maybe it's our crazy Ontario weather!!! Not sure where in Ontari-ari-ari-o you are but here in Guelph, it's been hot and humid for the last week; today it's like October!! (I'm surprised that we haven't had snowflurries - it's that cold and windy.)

I also have battled with depression off and on since I was 15. (I'm 45, divorced, no kids, no significant other). Not on any medication anymore but still the bouts of anxiety/depression. For me, it comes from being alone all the time and especially now, having been mostly housebound for 5 weeks, it seems the only energy I have is to think about how miserable I am which makes me more miserable. On the good days I think about how "great" life will be when I am back to my normal routine - but then 10 minutes later I think how it won't be "great" and just the same old b.s. - different day. On the good days I can go for long walks, eat decent meals and feel eager to get back to work and the regular routine. The bad days (today being one of them), I have to force myself to eat, the only walking I do is to the mailbox, could really care less if I have a job in which to go back and sleep away the afternoon. Is it a coincidence that the weather is lousy today? I feel it may be a factor - the good days are the sunny ones; the bad days are cloudy and gloomy. I get most depressed right now because there is so much I would like to do with my time recovering but there is no one to help me. The laundry is piling up, my floors are absolutely filthy, the bedsheets need to be changed but because I am not allowed to do any of that yet, it goes untouched and makes me even more miserable. I hate feeling helpless and I hate asking for help. The help I do get is from a "friend" who spends twenty minutes a day taking care of my cats because I am unable to do so myself right now. Those twenty minutes are sheer torture - I am lucky if this "friend" says "hello" when they walk in the door and the rest of the time I am being criticized for the dirty laundry/dirty floors/how I live/why can't I do this myself yet, etc. etc. God forbid they help me for 10 minutes with any of this. "I have my own life to worry about" is what I get told. I could go on and on but I think you get the idea.

The only way I get through it is by thinking that soon I can have the normal routine back. At least I will be able to take care of myself then and stop feeling so helpless. Surgery makes us more defenceless and vulnerable - I,too, am afraid of going too far outside of the building because I am scared that "something might happen" and there won't be anyone to help me.

I don't know if this has helped you any at all, but if nothing else know that you are not alone in feeling this way. Sorry this was so long - but I feel better having gotten this off my chest! Good luck to you! God will see us through this!!

I've been dealing with some depression and lots of fatigue, too. I'll be at 4 weeks tomorrow. I think my big problem is that I don't sleep well now, which makes me tired, which makes me depressed. I'm in surgical menopause, so from what I've read this is pretty typical. I bought some OTC sleep meds that I'm going to try tonight to see if I can get a decent night's sleep. Next week I have a follow up appt with my doc, so I'm going to talk to him about it. It's not too bad now, not fun, but not awful. But, I have to get back to work in the next few weeks and I really need a little more sleep and more sanity!

Katzz3, thank you for your reply, and yes it does help and I dont feel so alone...depression is so so the pitts! ...and most people really dont understand, I dont know why it is so hard for people to recognize it as an illness and that makes me angry and more depressed.

Yes, I agree the weather has alot to do with our moods as well, but I have been sleeping away alot of the nice days. I am in Peterborough, a few hours away but I think our weather is similiar...it is cold out this evening!

Thanks again and hope it gets better soon for you...just remember the housework will be there when you are able and its not worrying, so why do we worry about it?? I would be out or asleep when your friend comes to care for the cat so as not to listen to their complaints. I do understand cuz it drives me crazee too...I do have a little bit of help as I live in a basment apartment at my bro and sis-in-laws house...hoping to be able to get working and afford my own apartment again!

Take care and you can vent to me anytime!

The Potter; Yes not having the proper sleep can cause depression too and the surgical menopause...its all so new and I wasnt sure if that is what was going on or not...thanks your post helps too.