3months post up- exhausted

I am 3 months post op- had complications lost 1/3 of my blood needed another surgery and blood transfusions two days after .
I returned to work 25 hrs a wk -3 wks ago which is fine, I'm on modified but its everything else ! My life has returned to the way it was prior so I do all the cooking , all the cleaning , and I mean all of it. If I say anything to hubby I get back a " I'm gone 14 hrs a day speech ... I know he works hard and crazy hours but he gets days off too, sometimes 3-4 at a time and his life consists of playing Star Wars. He will take down a laundry basket if I ask . I'm not hAppy . I'm exhausted . I got up this morning walked in the kitchen saw the mess and I just cried .
I text him and said " I'm not happy lately " hoping he would respond with a what can I do, what's wrong... But nope his response " I'm not either"
So I didn't respond. Everytime I even mention about being tired it turns into all about him and his exhaustion. I appreciate how hard he works to take care of us. I make very little money . But what I feel matters too.
They say it takes 6 months to a yr to fully recover from surgery and I have had two and lots of complications . I'm so exhausted .

Wow. I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I don't understand how he could be so cold. I do everything in my house too. But my hubby was so scared when I had surgery. I like you lost a lot of blood and gave my family a scare. This made my hubby who normally doesn't do anything react. When I needed him he was there. I think you need to take care of yourself as best as you can. Do not cook if you don't feel up to it. When he runs out of clean clothes he will have to do his laundry. If he makes the mess he should clean it. Wives are not to be treated like hired help. I pray he never needs surgery.

I hope you start to feel better soon and your situation turns around. Im on iron supplements that boost my energy.

I understand. I had 4 blood transfusions 3 days prior to my surgery, I was told that it takes a while to build your own blood back. I lost 2/3 of my supply. My color finally started coming back around the 4-5 month mark. Yes I was tired all the time. I still tire quickly, but I have adjusted to my "new normal".

Husbands or should I say men in general will never understand what we have gone through. They can't. Do only what you can and rest. That is your body's way of telling you it is still healing. If your kitchen is a mess today, it will still be there tomorrow. I made my limitations clear to my husband on what I will and will not do. Even today, I do not vacuum. Just to strip the bed is like running a 5k for me. I no longer lift anything that I think is too heavy. It will wait till he does it or it doesn't get done. I've learned to let a lot go. Like you, if I complain or mention something hurts, he also comes back with, something hurts him. Sigh! I did not want this surgery, I guess nobody really wants it, but it was a life saving measure. I've learned to do for me first.

I don't know if your tiredness will ever completely go away, but it will get better. Give it time. {{{HUGS}}}