No Date: Soon to be scheduled TAH...Lots of questions!!!

I was just informed today that I will be having a TAH. I live by myself and after reading some of these posts, I am wondering if I am going to be able to take care of myself, let alone my 6 year old? I have had two c-sections in the past and just read that the c-sections are cake compared to a TAH. I am kind of freaked now. Is there anyway to prepare for this as a single person? How long is the recovery time? Will I be able to care for my son when I come home from the hospital? I heard that I won't even be able to go into the kitchen and fix something to eat. HELP!!!

I don't have all the answers or best advice....but I feel your anxiety.

I live with my bf but he has Parkinson's. I know he will do his best but I still worry. And I will have my three kids for two weeks a week following surgery. That stresses me a lot.

You will need help. Church family? Work friends?

I've had two csections as well. I've heard the same thing.

Recovery is different per person.

Good luck to you.

I am 6 weeks post op. You will definitely not be able to care for your 6 year old straight out of the hospital without help.. If you had to care for yourself, that even would be difficult, but you will not be in any mental or physical capacity to care for anyone else. I could not get up from the bed to walk to the bathroom unassisted for several days. You could be dizzy and off balance.I'd arrange help for a week for sure, 2 would be better, and 3 weeks would be perfect. If you arrange for help and only need it a short time you can cancel it. It is much easier to arrange and cancel early than to not have any arranged in advance and need it desperately. Everybody is different and you may be one of the lucky ones that bounce back quick. It's always better to prepare for the worst and hope for the best!!!There is a sub forum called hints from members in the pre op forum. It is full of threads for preparing for recovery. One thread I think will be helpful for you is a thread a sister posted about preparing for recovery for the single person. ( not sure if this link will work, but try)
https://www.hystersisters.com/vb2/sho...d.php?t=466479

Thank you so much for your posts. I have told very few close friends (some men) and most of them say I won't need any help and I'll be able to take care of everything in just a few days. Of course none of them have been through this. I don't think I will have any help. Now I am terrified and want to call the entire thing off. I am in so much pain but, I don't see how I can recover from this with no help after reading some of these posts. I just want to cry.

Brainstorm some ideas on how to get help. Don't give up. Parents, a favorite aunt, a sister. Even a college student could come stay with you for a week and help. Do you have a trusted babysitter? Church friends, neighbors, or friends of your 6 year old? If you fully prepare your home before surgery you can probably do this if you can at least get someone to come stay with you for 1 week.Some ladies go to a friends/family members house the first week to recover so the friend can take care of their child until they are ready.One lady sent her 5 year old off to stay with a relative for a week and she stayed home alone and took care of herself.Many many ideas to explore.
:cathugs:

Just remember that recovery is different for everyone. Go at your own pace. Hang in there! : )

I just had my surgery last Monday, and I feel pretty good. I had 2 prior C-sections. This pretty much feels like the recovery from those, even though those were horizontal incisions and this is a vertical.

I was able to navigate the stairs pretty well this morning.

The nurses told me I was doing so well because I was in shape beforehand.

Feel free to ask anymore specific questions, since the surgery is fresh in my head. I will tell you it wasn't as scary as I thought it would be.

I agree with Cathb911, I would highly recommend getting help if possible. I had a TAH but it wasn't expected and definitely caught me off guard. While you might 'feel' ok because of pain meds, you'll be in a fog and you can easily do something that you shouldn't causing complications - or at least that was my experience. As far as being a single parent, I agree that I'd suggest trying to line up assistance. If you cannot do that, at the very least I would prepare simple meals ahead of time and freeze or make sure you have plenty of stuff on hand. I wasn't able to drive for 2 weeks so had to rely on my husband for any necessities. While my mother and sister didn't offer assistance, the ladies from work were wonderful and rotated making meals the first week (very thoughtful of them) which helped tremendously.

I also was supposed to only be off 2 weeks with an overnight stay at the hospital. I ended up being off 6 weeks and was in the hospital 3 days (I've read that it can range 2-5 for a TAH) and you'll need to coordinate childcare during this time. If you cannot arrange assistance here are some tips I'd recommend to help you prepare:

1) meals - try to have a min of 2 weeks worth of meals/snacks and easily prepared items ready, more would be better

2) depending on the 6 year old, I'd definitely try to plan ahead for laundry, activities to keep the child busy that don't require you to physically participate, etc

3) Try to do any housework or big chores ahead of time because it will be some time before you can do them

4) Coordinate some type of helper for emergencies or doctor appointments (you'll need someone to drive, etc.)

5) You'll have restrictions on lifting so plan ahead for this

6) Basic hygiene can be tough, bending, squatting, etc. will be painful (maybe even restricted), so make sure you have baby wipes on hand and prepare for how you will assist your 6 year old (assuming they need help).

Most of all, you'll need lots of rest and the other ladies were correct, it is tough to take care of yourself, let alone anyone else. My daughter is nearly 15 and she didn't deal very well with her independent mom in this state so keep in mind that your child may have a tough time understanding what is going on as well. Best wishes, hugs.

Thank you to everyone for your posts. I am going to look into maybe some home health care. Maybe my insurance will cover it. I do have a couple friends who say they will go to the store and come by every now and again to check on me. This site has been amazing. So glad I have somewhere to come where the women understand what I'm going through. Thanks ladies.

I think you'll be pleasantly surprised at the people who step up and help when you need it. I am (-:

Good luck