I don't like my dc

Hi Ladies
I went back to my ob/gyn last friday because the first appointment was really a blurr.
I have a growth on the top outside of my uterus that is 18cm x 23cm. It was not there one year ago, so it is growing fast. I am not in any pain, unlike many of the ladies on this site, but rather uncomfortable. I feel like I'm preganat. My periods have always been on the heavy side, but nothing I have had any problems living with.
It appears I need "it" and one of my overies removed. Because of size and location of growth I must have full abdominal incission. I asked the Doctor if he could remove uterus at the same time. for several reasons.
1. My mom had uterus removed at age 41 for cancer. 2. Having this major surgury anyways why not? 3. I don't want to go through all this and still have a period. DH and I do not want anymore children as we have 2 that are 14 and 17 now.
My Doctor reply was no, he would not remove any "healthy" organs, and he beleives mine (uterus) to be in good order.
I spent a lot of the weekend crying about this whole thing, and like many of you I wished I could just wake up and it would be a bad dream. Not so!
I have booked an appointment with my family doctor to look at seeing someone else, but I'm afraid to wait. I just don't know what to do. I feel like I have no controll over what is happening to me. It's my body and I should have some say. I''m afraid to wait and not really sure about keeping date anymore because I don't like this guy and his attitude.
Any advise would be apprecated as my appointment with famly doctor is not until monday.
I'm stewing about this and need to reason it out. Thanks for listening to me rant!

Nicole

If you don't like the doc, not happy with his attitude, etc, then by all means get a 2nd opinion. And even if the 2nd opinion matches the first, if you like the 2nd doctor better, have him/her do the surgery.

Hi Nicole

I would most definitely get myself another doctor. It's very important to have confidence in your doctor. I agree with you too that it's your body and you should have a say in what happens to it. If you feel strongly about having your uterus removed then your doctor should give consideration to your wishes. You say you don't like this guy and his attitude. I'd be definitely looking for a second opinion and a doctor who you can relate to. Good luck.

I totally agree with the other ladies, get another opinion and try to find a dr that is more understanding. I have found a real jewel, I don't have a definate date yet, but both times I have met with him he takes the time to just sit and talk about all my concerns and explain everything, making sure he understands how I am feeling. He is great. You deserve that type of understanding from your dr!

Good luck and God Bless!

You need to feel comfortable with your surgeon, and your surgeon should treat you as a whole person. He's not the one who has to live in your body, you do!

I agree that you need to like and have full confidence in your doc. It is vital. You should take the time to get other opinions as this is too important. See as many as you need, preferably a gyn, not just the fam doc.

Please let us know how you are doing in this as it develops.

Sorry you are having to go through that. I had an OBGYN when I was pregnant who made me feel the way you seem to be feeling...so in my 7th month, I switched to another doc upon a neighbor's recommendation, and I'm so glad I did. I felt respected, and my concerns were taken seriously. It was like night and day. Therefore, I agree that you should get a second opinion. If it were me, I would get not only a second opinion, but another doc. if you can. Good luck!!

Hi Nicole
Sorry to hear you are having such a hard time. I went through several doctors before I ended up with mine. He is a hero as far as my gyn health goes. He has been very positive, very supportive, and always insisted that the choices about my care be up to me! He says that is the best way to insure his patients will be satisfied with his services. He gives me lots of advice based on his expert medical opinion, educates me as to my options, then lets me choose.

One really great book I read while preparing for my hysterectomy came from a local public library. It is "Just Take It Out!" by David Walters, M.D. You can do a search and read about it on the web. This book was a refreshing change of pace from all the other anti-hyst books I read for years. It talks about c-sections in the first half and hysts in the second half. He goes into great detail about why hysterectomies are advantageous for some women and goes on to tell you how to communicate with your doctor to get what you need. He tells you what you should expect, explains why so many doctors don't give women choices, and tells you how to regain control over your health. A very encouraging read. I felt empowered just reading it and I didn't even need to challenge my doctor's decisions.

Most importantly, I highly recommend you listen to the ladies who have replied. Get yourself a doctor that you trust will listen to your desires AND do what is best for you given his/her expert medical training. You are getting ready to embark on a journey into better health. If you were to need some type of extensive care, you need to feel you have a doctor (and staff) you could call for ANYTHING without feeling like you were intruding. They are there to serve you - search til you find one who will serve your needs if yours isn't able to do so. I have had to change doctors more than once because I was going to a dr that was not the right one for me. Doesn't mean he/she wasn't a good doctor - just wasn't the right one for me. Looking at it that way took pressure off.
Hope you find the answers you are looking for. This experience should be something to look forward to - with you , your dr, and his staff being the team that will accomplish the goal of better health (that includes your emotional health as well as the physical). A positive approach can go a long way in helping you have a great recovery
Tf

Hi Ladies
First of all thank you for your replies. I too felt I should get a second opinion, so today I went back to my family doctor to talk about my options.
Well she spent sometime with exsplaining that what I have is a cystic complex mass 23cm long by 18 cm wide and 12 cm in depth. Which apparently is very large. According to the ultrasound it is a good possiblity it may be cancer.
She told me my ob/gyn would not be her first choice, not because of his skills as she says he is one if the best, he is licenced to practice here in Canada, USA, Isreal and the UK. But due to his "people" skills or rather lack of them. The waiting lists to see these ob/gyn's as you all know is very long. It could take up to four months to get another surgery date with a new doctor.
I guess I was lucky to get into this guy so quickly. She was more than willing to send me to someone else, but advised agaist it. She said if it were her she would have the surgury as planned rather than risking the wait. She also assured me she would come up to check on me. He would provide the skills, she would provid the warm fuzzys.
Well it wasn't exactly what I wanted to hear, but I feel she was very upfront and I have trusted her with my care and the care of my children for 20 years now. So I guess I will keep my date with this ob/gny. Even though it means keeping my uterus and periods. Oh well I guess I don't get to be a princess just yet.
Take care and thanks again for all your support and advise.
Nicole

Nicole,

I am am so glad that your reg doc was so patient and understanding and explained everything to you. I think female docs can be so great, and your sounds terrific, and she will make sure you are ok, and taken care of. Her advise seems very sound, given all the circumstances, but could you maybe enlist her help in talking to the surg about possibly changing his mind and taking uterus also?

I just do not see any purpose in leaving it there...to have to suffer more periods, and possibly develop more probs, possibly even cancer, and then have to go thru more major surg later. Esp since he taking out the ovaries, you will be put into surgical menopause anyway, I would think, so why keep this organ that has no purpose anymore, and could be trouble later? As a matter of a fact, I wonder if you will even have very many periods, w/o the ovaries?

I am very sorry that they are suspecting cancer. Hopefully that will not be the case, or if it is, that they will get it all, and early. We will be thinking and praying for you. There are some great message boards here that are for women dealing with cancer issues that I think you would find very helpfull and supportive.

Keep us posted!!