Totally Confused

I am all set to have my surgery. I decided on having my cervix, uterus, and my left ovary taken out. My right ovary has never given me any trouble so I told my surgeon to leave it unless it looks bad. Yesterday Sept 16 10 days before surgery I end up in the emergency room with two 5cm cysts on my right ovary. One was bleeding into my abdomen and causing me to have lots of pain and vomiting. Now I think I should go ahead and have my right ovary taken also. I am terrified about menopause at 33. I never tolerated the pill very well and I dont want to be sick for the next however many years I have to take it. I am totally uneducated about this and my doctor is out of town untill my surgery. Since I was advised to have the hysterectomy I have been back and forth about it. After making the decision I started to have lots of pain and discomfort down there (more than usual). Which I took as gods way of telling me I made the right desision cause he new I was still unsure. Now I feel maybe god is whispering to me again. I just dont want to make any wrong decisions.

Dear Irish88,

Many of us had the same doubts about whether we were making good decisions or not. It sounds as if you are really in some difficulty, so it is wonderful that you are aware about the fact that you are making a decision while in pain. I'm not on HRT, and I don't plan on using HRT, but I've learned from this site and from several books about what they call sudden menopause that for women your age (I'm nearly 20 years older than you are), HRT really helps the adjustment process occur, though it might take some work to get the adjustment and balance to work properly. These situations are so individual that you want to be clear about why you are making this decision. For instance, why are you having the hyst in the first place? (why cervix, uterus, and left ovary?) If you are clear about why you are having the surgery -- that there is a medical reason for so doing -- then maybe let that help you make this final decision. If you really really really have doubts, cancel your current surgery date and talk it over more fully with your doctor, or perhaps even get a second professional opinion right now? That might be one do-able option for you. Whatever happens for you, know that others have walked and are walking along the same difficult path you are on, and we do get through the brambles in our way, because we're women, and women are strong.

Dear Irish,
When I was preparing for my hyst I had a suspicious mass on one ovary and didn't know whether I would wake up with one or both ovaries gone--at that time I asked my doc about hormones, because birth control pills had been a nightmare for me. He said that the amount of hormones in even the lightest birth control pills were massive compared to the amount in regular hrt. Thank God, my suspicious tumor ended up being only a deteriorated fibroid next to the ovary, and so I haven't had any hrt worries or cancer decisions. I hope that, if necessary, your hormone replacement options will not be too difficult to manage.
Love and a ,

Blue,
My surgery needs to be done. I have fibroids, adenomyosis, constant cysts on my left ovary, and cervical dysplasia for the fourth time. I know it is time for this to happen and that it is the right thing to do. I am just scared. I am sorry for not being more clear about my reasons why. Thank you for your advice i think i will get some books today so i can make an informed decision about my right ovary. Thanks Joma I had no idea hrt was milder than the pill.

Dear Irish88,

You *are* having a lot of issues. So it sounds as if the decision is based on real medical issues. (Sometimes it seems the decisions are not quite so clear.) The book I found that seemed as if it would be useful for younger women is called _The Premature Menopause Book: When the "Change of Life" Comes Too Early_, by Kathryn Petras. Another excellent title is _Sudden Menopause: Restoring Health and Emotional Well-Being_, by Debbie DeAngelo. Finally, a book I found most helpful to *me* was John R. Lee and Virginia Hopkins, _What Your Doctor May Not Tell You about Menopause: The Breakthrough Book on Natural Hormone Balance_. It sounds as if your right ovary might be headed to the place where your left ovary is. After hysts, the ovary function does change, and you might eventually need to have the right ovary removed, or it might not function as you'd hoped it might. Were I in your position, I might seek another doctor's opinion about it before making my final decision -- just were I in your position, not advice necessarily. I sought three opinions on my condition before doing anything. Just the kind of person I am, maybe. Very best wishes to you.

Blue,
I hear ya I also had three opinions and they all agreed.
But now i have the monkey wrench (right ovary). Thanks for the book suggestions. Hopefully i will get to the bookstore Monday so i can make an informed decision.
Thanks Blue