Less Nervous Now....I think!

Hi Sisters,
I just found this website today. What a blessing it is! It is so good to know that I am not the only one who is nervous about my impending surgery (TAH/BSO)

It is also good to know that I'm not the only one with bladder problems, back pain, anemia, gas, constipation, mood swings, etc, etc, etc.

A little history:
First went to gyno end of Dec 2001 with severe bleeding from 16 week size fibroid. (Shoot, I had thought it was only 12-week size until my dr visit last week) Had vaginal ultrasound. Yep the uterus was huge!
In January was place on Provera. (I was seriously beginning to think they were placebos because they did nothing)
Feburary had D&C. 9 day period two weeks later.
Spotted every two weeks for 1-3 days until June, then the dam burst again.
July got Depo-Provera shot and placed on continuous Micronor. Fine until last week when the bleeding started again despite still taking the 'pill'.
As of Thursday, still disagree with my gyno about my back pain. Although my 'regular' DR diagnosed arthritis in my spine, I think it is too much of a coincidence that my daily severe back pain began at the same time my gyno problems became full blown. My bladder also went heywire. Had to resort to wearing "bladder control products". Detrol LA and Ditropan didn't work at all.

Bottom line is that despite all my nervousness I look forward to hopefully regaining some of my quality of life. I have been in so much pain since December, the risks associated with surgery are somewhat diminished.

Thank you for being here and allowing me to release some of my anxiety.

Hi Donna, and welcome to HysterSisters! This is a great site, isn't it?

Be sure to check out the pull down menus on the home page. The search function (click on the pink button on the right top of the page) is also a great way to get information.

I hope you continue to get the support and answers you need!

s

Donna,
What a hard time you've had. I never know which is worst (being the competitive person that I am, I had the worst), having cancer with no pain, slight spotting symptom, or all the pain, anemia, and huge quality of life issues from fibroids, endo, etc. Either way, we're all in the same boat and needing the same type of surgery.

You've come to the right place for questions, answers and lots of support. So, read everything you can, use the search engine and the pull down menus, like gustogirl said. Then, whenever you're , :cry:ing, need a or a cyber , come post. You're with sisters.
Laura

Laura,
Thank you so much for your post. You are right, we are all in the same boat. For each of us, no matter what the problem, the result is the same. Pre-op we share the same nervousness, anxiety, worry, mood swings, aches, pains, and stress. All of these may be to different degrees for each individual, depending on the problem, but it seems these are the common threads we share.

I need this communication so very much right now. I'm feeling very alone and scared much of the time. I have friends and family nearby, but I am such an independent spirit, it is frightening, not only because of the surgery, but also because of having to depend on others so much for a while. Maybe that sounds silly to some but its how I feel. I have been single <again> for 13 years. I have recently earned my degree and gotten a promotion at work. Now after all that hard work establishing myself and becoming so self-sufficient, its going to be hard to let others help me. I'm usually the strong one that everyone else depends on.

Part of me wants desperately to be the 'pampered princess', but it sure is scary! I sound like my own worse enemy! lol! I guess in a way its easier to let my defenses down to "sisters" than it is to those close to me.

Hope you are doing well and thanks for your support.

Take care,

Hi sisters,
I'm fairly new to this site, and I'm SO thankful that you're here! I have know for a few years that my uterus is huge...filled with fibroids, but have been an ostrich with my head in the sand, in fact, refusing to even go back to the gyno for 3 years because I knew what he would recommend (hysterectomy). But..finally went last month...sure enough, uterus is 20 week size!! (no wonder those situps never worked)! I had an ultrasound last week, and have my next dr appt in the morning. I have been so upset...crying...trying to crawl back into denial mode..telling myself "I don't care what he says, I'm doing nothing"..etc..etc..
But...I have come completely out of denial, I know what I need to do to take care of myself. I do have a problem that I need to take care of , and I'm going to listen to my dr.
The "sign" I got this weekend was....this guy I've been seeing, asked me to go to the Ohio State football game with him yesterday. What a cool thing to do! I was so excited, then bam...period starts two days early..just in time to make my day miserable yesterday! I went to the game with him, but..(and ladies please..I don't mean to gross anyone out with my story, but I just have to get it out...please understand)...so, I kept running to the bathroom...didn't take enough feminine supplies with me. Ended up asking other women if anyone had a tampon, and every couple hours I was in need of another bathroom break. We stopped to eat, I went to the restroom, thought I was going to be ok, then get in the car and realize that I have a trickle of blood running down my leg!!!! I was mortified!!! I wanted to burst into tears! I was so embarrassed!! I didn't want to say anything to him. I end up looking like a jerk because as we're pulling out of the parking lot, I told him that the bathroom at the restaurant was gross, so I didn't go...could we please stop somewhere else!!! (2 hour drive home) So..he pulls into a truck stop to get gas...I run to the bathroom praying that he doesn't notice anything. Thank goodness I had taken a pair of jeans with me in case in got cool in the evening. So...I'm in the bathroom almost in tears...have to ask this woman if she had any tampons...she said she did in the car, and she would go get me one. So here I am loitering in this bathroom waiting for this kind stranger to save me! She came right back, and was very sweet. I went back to the car, and luckily didn't see anything on the light leather seat.
Anyway...what I'm getting at is...I'm so ready to just do whatever my dr. wants me to. I'm so sick of this monthly "curse" that keeps me tied to the bathroom! I'm done! I'm still scared, but I know I'll be alright.
So..after my dr. visit tomorrow, I'll probably be posting again with what the outcome is, and I'll probably be a real pest on here asking tons of questions, and writing these darn lengthy notes just to get my feelings out.
Thank you again for being here. It's comforting to know that I have "friends". Sorry for how long this post is. I'll try to keep it shorter next time. I'm just hoping to hear from other ladies who can relate to my denial, and finally...seeing the light, and dealing with what I need to do.
Take care...

MsKath,
My heart goes out to you! Many of us (including me) have similar stories, so you are not alone in this. It is a tramatic experience to go through. I am so happy that you have decided to take control and are coming to terms with the situation.

Don't apologize for the the length of your post. You said what you needed to say! Please do post back after your doctor visit and keep us up-to-date on your situation.

Donna

DonnaL,

Welcome and so glad you found us!!!! I am also scheduled for 9/11.

There are 8 of now who will be castlemates on that infamous day. Please let us know if you need to cry, complain, or worry - we will be there with you.

I posted this on another thread today, but meant to come back here to update.
Well...just as I suspected...I'm going to be scheduled for a TAH...keeping at least one ovary. The other has a cyst on it, but the doc says it may be gone by the time he gets in there, and if so, he'll leave that one intact also.
I was suppose to go back to work after my appointment, but I found myself sobbing on the drive back, so came home and called off! It's weird..I knew this was coming, but to actually hear it, and be told that at this point, I really don't have much choice (my uterus is huge..should have dealt with this years ago)...it just unleashed a flood of emotions! I'm a lot better now. I've been coming back and forth to this site all day, and everyone is wonderful.
I don't have a surgery date yet. I was told that I would be called by the end of the week with a date. So..now I'm stressing over that! I just want to know when!!
It's been a rough day, but in a way...a relief. Finally...an end to this monthly roller coaster ride!
Hope all is well with everyone else..
Take care..
Kathy

Hi, Cathy and Donna,

After reading your posts I remember so vividly those feelings!
Yes, many of us have bled through our clothing, prayed that period would hold off coming a few days, felt the clotting/floods,
and had to face the news that we were in need of a hysterectomy. Once the surgery date was set, I began that long wait period and the anxiety continued to build. This site became my lifesaver as I visited it as much as I could. The ladies here understood what I was feeling and allowed me to ask the silliest of questions. Little did I know that they had heard them all before! I could talk about my surgery as much as I wanted here and no one judged me whereas in my "real" world I had just about driven everyone crazy with my hyst chatter. I also downloaded the instant messenger and entered the hystersister chatroom and wow did I get support and knowledge there. The ladies have been my pals in print there ever since. After my surgery I had trouble sleeping and again this site got me thru those rough times. I would encourage both of you to continue to read as much as you can here and certainly feel free to join us in chat anytime. We would love to have you!
Warm wishes to you both for a smooth surgery,

Lynn/Cappy in chat