Scared of death during surgery

Hi everyone! I am sorry to have to be such a downer right now, but my life has turned into an absolute wreck and I need someone to turn to.

See, if I was JUST dealing with the idea that I have surgery in less than a month then I would be OK, but recently I have lost a very, very dear friend to severe depression. This was devastating for me and my family. My husband and I started smoking again (I know, bad choice) and now my thoughts are not only of my friends death, but I can't help thinking what if I don't wake up after my surgery? I know that this is as a result of what has all happened, but seeing the impact this could have on my family scares me.

I can't stop thinking about it. Have any of the sisters felt this way? How do I stop these thought patterns?

Thanks for listening.

I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. You are dealing with a lot for sure.
I think we all have those feelings. I hugged my teenage daughter when they called my name in the waiting room and cried like a baby when it was time to go into the or. I was so afraid I wasn't going to wake up from it. Your not alone feeling like that but you will be in great hands. The waiting and thinking about the what if's are the worst part. It'll be over and you will be back home recuperating before you know it.

I had these same feelings. The strongest was a vision that I didn't wake up as they were wheeling me to the OR. I am a newlywed and I thought how horrible for my DH. I think this is very common no matter what kind of surgery you are having. When I woke up in recovery, I had a big grin on my face and the nurses kept commenting that I didn't look or act like I just came out of major surgery-TVH and bladder sling. I was so thankful and thrilled to be alive and well! The tragic loss of a friend wold have anyone contemplating their own death. Not that I can give you advice on how to stop these feelings, but I believe you are going throgh a very normal grieving process. Time and support are what you need.

shannon:

i can tell you a someone who's just gotten settled into her hospital room on surgery day 1.. i think it's VERY normal. IN fact, i was on the boards here last night seeking u pport for my fears... and i got it!

That visualizaton meditation mp3 is great. it helped to calm me
reminding myhself why i'm having this surgery -- and how much i'll benefit after, helped to calm me

i also told myself that all the things i worry about during surgery can happen anywhere. IF something does, where better than i a well equipped operating room, surrouonded by alert professionals and with the love and prayers of my friends surrounding me!

I just acknowledged the fears, the bad possibilities and focused on the good. yeah i still cried when i kissed my daughter bye... but i wasn't floored by it.

you'll be well too!

kat

Shannon -
Me too.
J

I was fearful about dying too. What helped me was talking with the anesthesiologist. Having never gone through surgery before, I explained this to him during the operation prep and he assured me that he was going to watch out for me while I was under. Realizing that there was a person whose sole job was watching my vitals and who had the knowledge and experience to take care of possible problems that could arise did a lot to ease my mind.

I think the fear is completely normal. I had a tubal several yrs ago and my dr. said she almost canceled it because my BP was so high. I was absolutely sure that I wasn't going to wake up and if I did I'd be in huge pain or something. I remember waking up in recovery and I had the biggest smile on my face. I remember thinking "I'm alive and I feel just fine". You'd think I'd have remembered that when I had thyroid surgery 2 yrs ago, but I went thru the fear all over again and again woke thinking "amazing....I'm alive and I feel great". I keep reminding myself of those instances and yet I'm still very nervous. I can't explain it but it certainly seems to be normal. You're going to be just fine though and you will wake thinking "wow, this is amazing. not only am I alive but I feel great". That's my wish for you and I trust that it will be true. ((((HUGS))))

If you are religious, ask your family and friends to start a prayer chain for you. Have them ask HIM to give you peace and keep you safe. You will see and feel the miracles in the power of prayer!!


Ana

It is very natural to be afraid of the unknown. - I know that the anesthesioligst gave me some comfort She told me I will be right there at your head at all times watching you breath and making sure you wake up. Some hospitals have a Reiki guide that will put you in a deeper relaxation mode prior to surgery .I'm sorry about your friend, one problem you can have is coughing when you wake up from smoking but everyone will be right there with you. We are all here for support whenever you need us. Systers

Sorry you lost your dear friend.

It is quite normal to wonder about not waking up. That was the one thing that pre-occupied my mind before surgery. Try not to get too hung up with negative thoughts. A positive mental attitude helps a lot. Speak to your aneathesist before your surgery he/she will put your mind at rest - mine did and I was fine.

All the best.