TAH: Sad, Dazed, Scared, Embarassed--Is this typical?

I’m scheduled for an abdominal hysterectomy on December 16 due to fibroids, andemyosis, endometriosis, a swollen fallopian tube, ovarian cysts, and an enlarged uterus. I have only had a few days to get used to his news and I am dealing with a variety of emotions so I’m hoping this wonderful community can help me deal with what I have in store. I’ve tried to talk to a couple of friends but I’ve ended up feeling worse because they don’t see it as a “big deal”.

I recently lost 94 pounds and now weigh 128 pounds. Because I have a lot of sagging skin and nursing left my breast sagging to my belly button, I decided to get abdominalplasty and breast augmentation. On my patient history I mentioned having ovarian cysts so the plastic surgeon said he would coordinate with my gynecologist to see if surgery was necessary and they could do it at the same time. My gynecologists over the last 8 years had been “watching” them so I thought no big deal—they’ll decide to “watch” it longer. After 8 years, recurring pain was the norm so why do they suddenly care all of a sudden? (Sorry for sounding cynical. I felt a bit ignored by my gynecologists over the years. Sadly, I felt like it was due in part to my weight. One told me she couldn’t get a good feel through my fat.)

Last Friday, my gynecologist sent me to a specialist and he said it was definitely time to do the hysterectomy and added another item to the list of problems justifying it. So far I know the uterus will be taken but I don’t know about the other parts yet. If he can, he wants to save my ovaries because I’m “still young”. Is 42 young? Given my emotional state, I don’t how well I would deal with the change in hormones caused by taking them out.

I’m surprise at how sad the news has made me—my family plans aren’t altered by the news. I’m crying a lot and embarrassed because I’m having the tummy tuck at the same time. I'm overwelmed with trying to quickly coordinate the appointments and doctors. I’m scared because my household demands a lot of my time and I don’t have any outside support. Plus, had two major leg surgeries over the last 3 years that involved 8 weeks before pain diminished and I regained some mobility. I don’t know what I’m going to be dealing with and whether I will be miserable 9 days later on Christmas Day.

Anyway, ladies please help this basket case. Here are my questions:
•If you had an abdominal hysterectomy, tummy tuck, and breast augmentation, how did you feel at day 7-10 of recovery?
•Are these emotions common? Why am I sad?
•Any coping suggestions?
•Is 42 young to have ovaries removed? How bad would the hormone side effects be?
•Any tips for keeping your news private at work? I have to take sick leave and as a supervisor it’s posted on the office schedule as such.
•How long will I need to be off work? (I have a “desk job”.)

Thanks for your support.

I'm having a breasy augmentation the same time as my hysterectomy too! I haven't had a problem getting the Plastic Surgeon and gyno to coordinate. My surgery date is December 12th. So I can let you know how my pain is aften then.

Good luck and thanks for replying!

The sadness is common and expected. Its a really big deal. I'm 39 and they removed both of my ovaries on 11/15/13. I was dealing with hot flashes and up and down emotions, but my doctor is wonderful. She put me on low dose estrogen and I feel much better. Once surgery is over you will be so happy to be on this side. I have no regrets about surgery or losing my ovaries. Best of luck with your surgery and recovery. I'm always here if you want to talk again. Warm wishes.
Belinda