LAVH: frustrated with lack of response

I completely understand how u feel, I had mine done 2 yrs ago. I liked to have killed myself trying to get the house clean ALL the laundry done because it never really is. I had a 4 month old and and 8 yr old I had to take care of making sure I cooked food ahead because God forbid my husband cook or clean. It is very frustrating! But take this advice Make them wait on u hand and foot!!!!!! This is a big deal and u need to heal emotionally and physically. Take a litle vacation from it all. If it wasnt for my mother in law I probly would have hurt my husband lol. I love im very much but when it comes to taking care of the house kids or me hes cluless. Good luck with everythin and if u just need someone to rant to Im here.

	Quote:
Originally Posted by rebecca102 I completely understand how u feel, I had mine done 2 yrs ago. I liked to have killed myself trying to get the house clean ALL the laundry done because it never really is. I had a 4 month old and and 8 yr old I had to take care of making sure I cooked food ahead because God forbid my husband cook or clean. It is very frustrating! But take this advice Make them wait on u hand and foot!!!!!! This is a big deal and u need to heal emotionally and physically. Take a litle vacation from it all. If it wasnt for my mother in law I probly would have hurt my husband lol. I love im very much but when it comes to taking care of the house kids or me hes cluless. Good luck with everythin and if u just need someone to rant to Im here.

Thank you that means so very much!!!

Not a Problem 8o)

Hey heather
I am 16 days post TAH and I can tell u from experience that the more that u worry the more u will slow down your recovery after....babe there is a very good reason y u are having the surgery its a journey that a lot of us women will have to go thru at some point in our lives...try and stay positive and see it as a new chapter in your life for the positive....we are all here for u babe u are not alone.....most of all if u blv in god he is with and his angles too babe....will remember u in my prayers.....stay focused on the end result the journey maybe a little bumpy but u will get there.....pls keep in touch and let me know how it all goes ok? xxxxx big hugs xxxxxx

Hi heather26.

I understand how you feel. I also posted a message last week and got no replies, so I felt sad and lonely. I had read a lot of messages here and knew a little about the question I asked, but as you say, I just wanted to feel there was somebody listening. Now I know I am not the only one to feel like that and I actually feel better - LOL.

I just got back from the hospital, my period came last Sunday and it was so heavy, we had to rush to the ER... I had to stay there for two days, but I think it was a good thing, as now I am not as afraid of the surgery as I was. Everybody was nice to me there, and I keep thinking that at least I will get rid of these horrible periods. I try to look at the bright side of this, and I'm sure everything will be OK for all of us!

I just wanted to point out that alot of people post for the first time and are greated by Princess Be Well. She tells you how the site works and gives you links. This post CAN NOT be answered by us. It is just a welcome greeting.

I had a total abdominal on 12 August; I'd had three days to prepare, as I hadn't realized the fibroid tumor was as threatening as it was. That was a blessing and a curse, in terms of angst and nerves as well as preparation. Get a good support network: friends, loved ones, whomever and USE THEM. Not only is this a huge physical deal, it is a huge emotional and psychological deal and the only way through it all is...through it. Don't avoid, minimize, sensationalize...whatever you are feeling is 'right' for you. If some minimize it and you don't agree, then find those who can 'hear' you for what you need (even if it is this site). Conversely, you might hear horror stories or things that make you wonder why all the heightened response is not happening to you. Don't try to fit in with anyone or anything; your situation is unique and therefore, treat it as such. Glean what you can, use what helps and let the rest just wash over you.
As for specifics: while I had my uterus, tubes, cervix and ovaries taken due to a fibroid tumor the size of Kansas sitting on my uterus, I found that even one day post surgery was an incredible step forward: I could walk down the hall and back, go to the toilet on my own (and boy, did that feel great!) and with proper adjustment of bed and pillows, rest relatively comfortably. The first day was rough, though: your lower back will ache so see what you can do to stretch, massage or manage it. When the staff ask about your pain level, include that, not just your surgical area. You will feel burning as your nerve endings begin to 'reconnect' again, you will feel lumpy and achy in your lower back and thighs, you might have a general feeling of nausea...all of that goes into the pain scale. Do NOT be stoic--the nursing staff are right when they tell you that it is better to stay ahead of the pain rather than try to catch up to it. Trust that your staff knows which pain meds are right for you and take them; consequences will be dealt with later but relief then and there is vital. I am on my third day home and the first two seemed okay...today seems a set back: I am queasy for no apparent reason and my pain is a bit stronger. A GREAT thing yesterday was (wait for it) having a poo--luckily it didn't hurt and I was able to pass it all. You WILL feel better for it, so get up and walk when you can, take stool softeners or whatever your doctor recommends and try for a bit of roughage when you are able to handle it in terms of your diet.
I hope you find this message, because you are NOT alone. I know some folks minimize this as a 'common' surgery for women--that may be, but it is NOT common for you! Don't lose sight of it by trying to fit it into others' stories about their situations; live yours and don't compromise, now or later.

	Quote:
Originally Posted by Dramarulz I had a total abdominal on 12 August; I'd had three days to prepare, as I hadn't realized the fibroid tumor was as threatening as it was. That was a blessing and a curse, in terms of angst and nerves as well as preparation. Get a good support network: friends, loved ones, whomever and USE THEM. Not only is this a huge physical deal, it is a huge emotional and psychological deal and the only way through it all is...through it. Don't avoid, minimize, sensationalize...whatever you are feeling is 'right' for you. If some minimize it and you don't agree, then find those who can 'hear' you for what you need (even if it is this site). Conversely, you might hear horror stories or things that make you wonder why all the heightened response is not happening to you. Don't try to fit in with anyone or anything; your situation is unique and therefore, treat it as such. Glean what you can, use what helps and let the rest just wash over you. As for specifics: while I had my uterus, tubes, cervix and ovaries taken due to a fibroid tumor the size of Kansas sitting on my uterus, I found that even one day post surgery was an incredible step forward: I could walk down the hall and back, go to the toilet on my own (and boy, did that feel great!) and with proper adjustment of bed and pillows, rest relatively comfortably. The first day was rough, though: your lower back will ache so see what you can do to stretch, massage or manage it. When the staff ask about your pain level, include that, not just your surgical area. You will feel burning as your nerve endings begin to 'reconnect' again, you will feel lumpy and achy in your lower back and thighs, you might have a general feeling of nausea...all of that goes into the pain scale. Do NOT be stoic--the nursing staff are right when they tell you that it is better to stay ahead of the pain rather than try to catch up to it. Trust that your staff knows which pain meds are right for you and take them; consequences will be dealt with later but relief then and there is vital. I am on my third day home and the first two seemed okay...today seems a set back: I am queasy for no apparent reason and my pain is a bit stronger. A GREAT thing yesterday was (wait for it) having a poo--luckily it didn't hurt and I was able to pass it all. You WILL feel better for it, so get up and walk when you can, take stool softeners or whatever your doctor recommends and try for a bit of roughage when you are able to handle it in terms of your diet. I hope you find this message, because you are NOT alone. I know some folks minimize this as a 'common' surgery for women--that may be, but it is NOT common for you! Don't lose sight of it by trying to fit it into others' stories about their situations; live yours and don't compromise, now or later.

Thank you so much. my surgery is less than a week away so this is all very helpful ...please keep me posted and speedy recovery to you

Oh Heather, I hear ya' and I feel the pain. Although I am finished with my surgery, and working on week 4 of recovery, I know what it was like preparing for it.

I had lists and lists of things to do, so my hubby would be okay without my help, so my kids would be okay, so everyone would be okay without me for a possible 8 weeks or longer (there was a big question as to what the mass was - turned out to be a basketball sized fibroid).

The day before surgery, while I was colin cleansing and on clear fluids, I was still preparing for my family.

It is not easy, it is quite stressful and you are not alone at all...... :-)

I understand your frustration. I am having lots of anxiety and everytime someone ask me if I am OK, I get weepy. This surgery is a big deal and it is my prayer that your surgery goes well and that your recovery is smooth. I will continue to pray for all and all the sisters that are scheduled for upcoming surgeries.