I am soooo mad at a friend

Just an observation here -
Your original post doesn't say whether or not you actually told him you had major surgery or not. Nor do you say if you told him exactly what was being done. You said "he wanted to talk" but do you know what he wanted to talk about? Did he actually use the word intervention? Did you actually tell him that you didn't want/need intervention?
Is it possible that he was thinking your boys weren't being as supportive as he thought they should be? Is it that he was concerned that you weren't healing as fast as he thought or heard your should be and wanted to help?
We, as women, know a little more about this surgery than the average male BUT we, as SISTERS, know a lot more than those who haven't gone through this surgery.
So many people, and not just men OR just women, will relate another story about a sister-aunt-mom-grandmother-friend who just flew through surgery and recovery and were back to doing their old things days or a couple weeks after this surgery. It has been often compared to c-sections. We, as sisters (or princesses) know that this is not the norm and recovery CAN take longer.
Having said that, is there the tiniest little chance that you overreacted and read things into the request that weren't there? Not everyone expects you to be back to 100% and there are those that just don't understand the whole recovery process.
I say call your friend. Ask him what it was he wanted to talk about and arrange a time for coffee or 'whatever'. He may have wanted to talk, maybe do an intervention, but maybe it wasn't you, your boys or your family but someone else you know. You won't know until you have that talk.

Autumn