Brenda Anne

I was just thinking about you and wondered how your appointment went today. Well, I hope! and I hope that your doctor could answer all of your questions.

I just read your detailed post about all that you have gone through and it sounds so familiar! We have so much in common in our history. I read with great interest about the lake/pool theory. I had gone on a houseboat for a week right before my CIN3 diagnosis (turned out to be cancer, advanced very quickly, just like you). That makes me wonder if the same thing happened to me, I had an infection that didn't want to go away and the doctor gave me an antifungal medication that cleared it up. It is very scary to think that these things could be related! And a lot of women out there have no idea of what they are exposing themselves to or the risks involved. We have another houseboat trip planned for the end of this summer. I hope that my surgery is over by then and I can swim without worrying over that little detail!

My problems are seemingly progesterone related as well. My doctor suspects that my miscarriages are hormone related, as well as immune related, one making the other worse and risking a baby's life from the very start. Those, along with the clotting disorder (which you don't seem to have, one thing that we don't have in common!) make me so very sure that a hysterectomy is the way to go.

I think, in your shoes, I would get a copy of your doctor's opinion and travel for a second opinion. I do understand the small town concept and know how hard it is to get unbiased opinions. In my situation, it isn't that the other doctors want to discredit mine, they want to make sure he is RIGHT all of the time, as well as one another! They stick together like glue around these parts! I went to another doctor once and he asked me why I didn't trust MY doctor and recommended to the insurance company to turn down my referral to a specialist, based on what the first doctor said. He never even examined me or asked what my problem was! I took my chart, made an appointment with someone outside of his area and blacked out mention of his medical group so the new doctor didn't know who he was dealing with. Isn't that sad??

If you want a second opinion, get one. Make sure you are comfortable with this decision, you can't turn back! Good luck!

Howdy-
My apt details are all posted under a post by joyeau. I would go through it again but I would probably be kicked out of here. It was sooooo long.
I think that we have to be related! I need a sister! When I had my LEEP done, the doctor kept asking me if I had a bleeding problem because he was having a hard time keeping it under control. I told him that I didn't think that I did but was never checked. I have had 3 kids and nothing was ever said about it then so.... I wonder if the clotting factor is wierded out with a progesterone imbalance???? Oh, so many questions and so little time. After what happened to me today, I wonder if I should give up. I wont though. I need to get this over and done with.
I did call for a second opinion and have an apt for tomorow at 10:00. After reading my chart today however, I think that the second opinion will be a waste of time. I had cancer, could get it again and I don't want to die. So HI **, HI **, IT'S OFF TO THE CASTLE I GO. Only 8 days left to worry and wait. I hope it goes fast. No, I hope it goes slow. AURGGGGGGGGGGG!
How was your Monday?
I will write more later. I am sooooo tired! And this was only pre-admission. Help!!!
Hugs to Zelda
Brenda

Make sure you read the part about my insurance comp in my post to joyeau. I strongly dislike these people. They want my entire chart! I would have slapped that doctor by the way, but I have been in a slapping mood for the last 10 months
More to follow...
Brenda.

I posted under your other post, after browsing through a bunch of different areas to try and find you LOL! Oh well, I found it, posted, you can read my short reply there. I'll post the bigger reply here, since I don't really "know" the lady who posted that post first and it felt kinda strange posting to you in HER post! hahaha

My clotting disorder causes too much clotting. The docs think it caused the miscarriages that I have had and blocked the placenta from nourishing the baby. I didn't know about the disorder until late last year, when I demanded to be tested for blood disorders. I read a lot on the internet and found some proof that certain disorders can cause miscarriages and still births. My doc had said naw, couldn't be, he didn't believe that I could have a rare disorder, or any disorder, just bad luck (?!!?) and that if we kept trying, we would eventually have a baby together. NOT! I went to a hematologist who ran one simple little test and found this disorder. It is supposedly fairly common, 5-7% of the population has it, but it isn't often diagnosed until the person throws a clot and is either hospitalized or killed from it! I guess I am lucky that I found out beforehand. I now take aspirin daily, I hope that is enough to keep it from causing problems. The hematologist seemed to think it was more than enough, he wasn't that concerned. My obgyn, on the other hand, has flipped out about me, written notes and charts and taken my case to his colleagues to ask opinions and find information. I am thrilled! After 6 years together, my husband and I finally have a reason for all of the miscarriages we have had. It is sad that it took this long, and it happened after we gave up on having children, but at least we know the cause. Or maybe know the cause. Or partial cause. So many things seem to have been stacked against us, I am surprised we got pregnant at all.

There was a lot more that I wanted to say and now I am forgetting what you had posted about over there. One was about the cute x-ray guy and your post about your husband. Very sweet! My husband is my life, he's just the cutest, sexiest man I've ever been with and I love him til death. There was a cute, young doctor who did one of my IUIS (assisted insemination procedure). He was SO cute and my husband was there, feeling uncomfortable with this cute guy "down there" and I kept smiling at my husband, holding his hand, trying to make him feel better. The doc looked up and realized that my husband was uncomfortabe, he wasn't my regular doctor because it was a weekend, and asked if my husband wanted to come and stand with him and help him do the insemination!! I laughed and asked what he meant, it sounded a little odd, but he was serious, he said that sometimes the men feel better if they can assist, they feel like they haven't stood by and watched some other guy create a baby with their wife. I thought that was the sweetest, kindest thing anyone has done for us during our ordeals!! My husband said he was intimidated by this man's looks, but once he said he wanted my husband involved, the doctor turned into a doctor, and a compassionate human being. It was very sweet of him and turned our day around from being stressful and uncomfortable to a day we will always remember. I did get pregnant, but lost the baby at just 18 days after the IUI. Barely enough time to miss a period, which was the case with most of my miscarriages. But it was a good memory and I am glad we have that little light from that time in our lives.

I am going on and on again. Sorry! I got way off track there. I was just thinking about how our poor husbands feel through all of this. For most men, women's problems are so foreign and they have no clue about how they should act or react to major issues. My husband was such a rock through it all, my solid foundation! He's so far from perfect, but he tries so hard and wants to help me, which is better than being perfect, in my eyes.

{{{hugs}}} back at ya Brenda!

Sorry that it has been so long since I typed
I have just been going through the hassels with my ins. comp. and having more tests and second opinions. I need to have some time to sort out all of these weird feelings that I have been having from the anxiety and stress of all that has been going on.
It is bad enough that I am going through that "am i doing the right thing" syndrome and then the insurance company comes back with the "you really don't need this surgery" speach. It's like... just when I have convinced myself that this is the right thing to do... Wham! Another brick hits me in the face.
My second opinion went well. The other OBGYN concurred with the first doctor but also told me that this was not a "necessary" surgery. He said that the cancer could never reappear again and that the cure rate is very high. Then, he turned around and said that because this is my second bout with this type of cancer, that my body may have a hard time keeping it away. I asked him if his wife was going through it, would he have her have the surgery? He said that if it was the cancer alone, he would not. And then he said but.... if she was experiencing everything else that I was going through then he would. (Hormonal imbalances and prolapsed bladder). Now, I know that the bladder could be repaired with a seperate surgery, but I am finished having kids, I have had the GREAT cancer scare and this type of cancer has now shown it's ugly self twice in the last four years. The first was on my face. OH GOD... Show me what to do.
I will write more later. Have to get my kiddo off to school.
Hugs and Love,
Brenda

I've been following you over on the pre-op board posts. I haven't had much time to post (redoing our front yard and have been out sweating in the heat ), but I have been reading! I am so glad to know that you had the second opinion and things are straight with that. I think the hardest part of my fertility treatments was wrestling with the insurance companies and if I didn't have that stress, things might have turned out differently. But that's a whole different story. I am glad that you are moving forward!

I am afraid that I am not moving anywhere fast. I have an appointment on the 9th with a rheumatologist to talk about my immune system. I am still not happy about having to wait so long (My appointment should have been tomorrow) and then I still have to see the hematologist and my obgyn said he might even want me to see the reproductive endocrinologist! I am not sure what he's expecting or what he's looking for. My husband put a bug in his ear about us having a baby and he wants to make sure that all of these doctors cannot figure out a way for me to keep my uterus. At least I think that is what he is trying to figure out. If I could take hormones, things might be different. We've already been around and around about this and it is frustrating to have to wait it out to his satisfaction! I don't think my surgery is going to be any day soon and it seems unreal that I will ever have it done at all.

Can you tell that I am discouraged? I am trying to keep my chin up, as my husband says, but it is hard to do when nothing is happening.

So your surgery was moved to May 2nd. That's only two days away. I posted a response in the pre-op board, if you haven't already seen it. I just wanted you to know that I am thinking about you, have been thinking about you all weekend and hope that all goes well. Keep in mind that the waiting is the hardest part and you are well on your way to having that part over with!!!!

Hey girlfriend...
Are you still out there somewhere? Havn't seen you on the board for a while. Hope all is okay. I go back in in a week but I am not posting it yet.
Hugs,
Brenda.

HAY!! I have been looking for you! I did a search for your posts yesterday and the last one was on the 9th. I've been worried about you, but wasn't sure if you were still around or what happened. Someone said you were going in for your surgery last week, so I've been just checking the post-op board to see if you would be there. I am glad to hear from you! Are YOU ok?

I just posted about my "developments" here and on the cancer board. I had a NORMAL cycle! Actually, I had two! My last one was long, but not as painful and my period wasn't excruciating.. This one was 28 days! I have had a lot more pain than when I posted the other day, but not as much and not as bad as before. I am really hoping that I have turned a corner for the better. Hoping for a miracle that my forever whacked out hormones will have decided that I am serious about cutting away at their allies haha! And decided to behave themselves! My husband and I are going to put off the surgery, even talk of surgery, and I'm enjoying life as much as possible for as long as possible. I didn't end up in bed for ONE DAY of my period this time!!!! I was out doing yard work and exercising, it was fantastic. I feel like a new person! My right leg has been really bothering me since yesterday, but Tylenol is all it has taken to make it hurt less.

I hope that you are doing ok. If you want, you can write to me at zeldapup@telocity.com and we can talk more privately.

Take good care!

Hey girlie, I am so glad to see you posting POST op!! wonderful!!! I am SO so so so so! proud of you, I have been beaming since I read your posts. I'll have you know that you had your surgery on my birthday, so that had to be the best of luck for you!

I just knew you would do fine and feel wonderful afterwards. I know it wasn't easy for you, but now that it is done, you will be back on your feet, better than ever and ready to rumble in no time at all. Just remember to listen to your body, don't push recovery and keep smiling!!!!!