Worried about sex after hysterectomy

Hi I am deciding if I should have a vaginal laparoscopic hysterectomy. (Leaving cervix and ovaries) My obgyn has given me the option, and I am thinking of scheduling it this fall (I am a very active 35 year old and I don't want to be laid up during the summer).

Reason for hysterectomy is adhesions and scar tissue surrounding uterus from a botched tubal ligation 8 years ago, heavy heavy bleeding and severe cramping on and off throughout cycle, but bedridden for 2-3 days on period.

I'm most worried about what sex will be like after. I have heard from Both sexes that it can feel different, empty, cavernous, and not as pleasureable for either man or woman.

Also, since having this "on the table" I've been having many dreams of being pregnant and birthing babies and having newborns. (I have three children 15,14,11 and my husband has two 11,8) and we don't plan on having any together (both our second marriages, been married almost a year) anyways....is it normal to be having these kind of dreams and waking up sad and scared to have a surgery that will make it impossible to have another baby?

Has anyone regretted their decision to have a hysterectomy? What kind of recovery time am I looking at? I am very active, a runner, and weight train 4-5 times a week...I don't know how long I can manage "taking it easy" without going crazy!

Thanks in advance for any advice

J.

All of what you are feeling is very normal. The good thing is you have many months to prepare for your surgery and this site will be a great source of comfort and information for you.

Many women are concerned about how intimacy may change for them after surgery, and every woman is different. I had a TAH including the removal of my cervix and I have to admit, things are better than they were pre-surgery. Other sisters feel same way, and my libido is higher than it was pre-surgery too. No one can predict how your body will react but since you are keeping your ovaries, you’ll still have estrogen in your system which will provide natural lubrication and elasticity to the vagina, all which aide in intimacy enjoyment.
Weird dreams are also pretty common both before and after surgery because your mind is processing so much change right now. The loss of reproduction, whether you were done having children or wanted more, has an impact on you and so your dreams are just a way for you to work all these things out quietly.

I can honestly say I haven’t had any regrets. I didn’t have long to make my decision about having surgery but it truly did improve my overall health and well-being and I think it will do that same for you.

Hi Figurechick -

I am glad you can keep your cervix and ovaries. That is good, especially on the ovaries.

Sex after surgery is different for everyone. Some say it is better, some say it is worse, and everywhere in between. I had a TAH BSO (lost uterus, cervix, tubes and ovaries), and for me sex feels different. My orgasms are not as intense (I miss the muscle contraction of my uterus). But, they are more frequent. DH cannot tell any difference. We do have to use lubrication, which frustrates me.

Recovery is also different for everyone. But, you need to think in terms of weeks and not days. Talk to your doctor about your weight lifting and running. You will be under restrictions - typically 10 lbs for 6 weeks and 20 lbs for 8 weeks. You may have additional restrictions with your weight lifting and when you can return to this activity. The same will be true for running. You will be doing lots of brief and frequent walks, as these help you heal.

You will need help around this house with cooking, cleaning, dishes, laundry, shopping, driving, etc. While you will not be bed ridden, you will need to rest. I know it seems like it will be impossible, but keep in mind you only get one chance to heal right. Your brain can go stir crazy (I know mine sure did) so have items to entertain your brain while you recover.

Just remember you are not alone in this. We are here for you.