Still struggling with the decision

HI, I have surgery scheduled for May 5, but since the doctor has given me so much control over my personal body, I am considering waiting for 6 more months and see how things are going then before doing this. I was all set to go, then read everything I could find on the internet and on this site. Now I am thinking maybe I should wait.

Here's the deal: I am 54 years old, and *still* having periods on a monthly basis. I have a uterus that is a 12 week size, up from an 8 week size last August. Three fibroids that are putting pressure on the bladder, causing me to feel full and have to urinate a lot-like every 50 minutes or so during the day and 4 or 5 times during the night. I also am having some pelvic pain and back pain. The OB/GYN doesn't think the back pain will go away because I have had back surgery almost 20 years ago for ruptured disc.
Anyhow, I did the Lupron shots for 6 months, the uterus and fibroids shrunk, the thinking was that I would go into menopause during that time. But it didn't happen.

Then I decided (with information) that I would wait and see, and hoping that menopause would shrink the fibroids so that the bladder pressure and pelvic pain would go away. This time the doctor said that the fibroids will shrink with menopause but only by about a third from the start of menopause, they won't go all the way down. So it depends on how big they are when I start.

I have family coming the first of June and we have a big camping, golfing, tenting, kayaking, bike riding, hiking, climbing trip planned to spend with them for 10 days. I have summers off and want to spend my summer golfing, and being outdoors with my DH. So that is influencing me also at this time. It looks like the people on this site have a recovery time of about 2 or 3 months at the least before you can get back to all your normal activities? The doctor told me I could probably go back to work after 2 weeks at the least. That seems a little optimistic from what I have seen here?

But then, just when I think I have made my decision to wait, I get a sharp pelvic pain, or pain on both ovaries, or dribble a little urine when getting out of bed. But I can live with it for a while longer if I have to.

When DO normal people go into menopause? It seems like all my friends have already even for several years.
Sorry this is so long, I really need to decide pretty quick as a lot of arrangements would need to be made. I am making an appointment right away to get another opinion, but I think I will hear the same from all docs, it's my decision how much discomfort and pain I am willing to put up with now, and how long before menopause might relieve some of it.

I can't offer much help becuase I am YEARS away from menopause. But I did want to send you a .

I don't know that anyone can tell you what you should do. This is your body and your decision. You are probably doing the right thing by getting a second opinion.

There is never a good time to have this surgery. I was planning to wait till September due to work committments, and not wanting to spend my summer recuperating. However, I've come to the conclusion that I can no longer live with the daily pain. So, I am scheduled for June.

It's all a matter of how much you can put up with and for how long. I wish you luck in your decision making process. The best idea I can give you is to research as much as you can. And talk to the ladies here at Hystersisters. They are a wealth of information.

Tam

I wish I could offer some advice, but I can't. This is a tough decision and I put mine off for 6 years. If I had known then what I know now, I would have had a hyster years ago.

Fortunately for me, I went ahead with it, as they found pre-cancerous material.

Best of luck with your decision. This board is a wonderful place to get information. Please keep us posted.

Wow, can I come camping with you, sounds like a great time!

I'm sorry but I don't have any comments about menopause, I'm not there yet. But it sounds like you may have already made up your mind to wait. If your ok with it, and your doc is ok with it than go ahead and wait. If it becomes more than you want to deal with than you can have it done at that point.

There are days that I think I don't really need to have it done, but there are days that I want to have it done right then and there. Those days outnumber the good for me so I'm having mine done in June.

There is no shame in wavering--I'm pretty sure we have all done it. And like someone else said, there is no perfect time to have surgery. There will always be something that is more important, especially if the surgery is based mainly on quality-of-life issues. I put mine off for years too, and you know what? I needed all the time I took in order to commit myself to my decision. If you are wavering, you are not yet comfortable enough with your choice, IMHO, to go ahead yet. Only you, however, can decide when it's time, or if it ever will be time. You can explore other options, like myomectomy, or just wait it out (that was what I was trying to do, but like you, menopause seemed to be nowhere near my horizon).

Anyway, consider all your options. It sounds like you have the luxury of time! Eventually you WILL make a decision, believe me!

This is a tough one, especially when your doctor leaves so much of it in your hands. It would have been easier for me if I were told I had to have the surgery. Like you, my doctor (thankfully) allowed and encouraged me to try everything short of surgery. I did and everything failed. I finally called her and told her I'm ready for a hyst. She agreed and said that I have all the indications for one. So, why am I struggling with my decision? Sometimes I think I should wait it out. I'm 49 and have no idea when I'll reach menopause. I'm somewhat stable now because I'm on Depo Provera. However, I don't like being on DP. I'm sure I'm going to go back and forth a million more times before my surgery on 4/28, but I'm committed to going forward even having reservations.

Sounds like you are suffering quite a lot. You'll have to decide when enough is enough. I think you'll know when that happens. But don't be surprised if even then you have doubtful thoughts. I think it is natural.

PrairieLake Lady - where are you from? I am in MN too and we meet so few people from here.

And having said that - I can completely relate to your scheduling. I wanted to have my surgery b4 summer so I can enjoy whatever summer I can - I had a failed ablation last summer, and it wrecked 1/2 the summer. Also wanted my little ones to still be in school.

Up here, summers are precious and gorgeous and I couldn't waste another.

So I hear you - I am going in next week (YIKES! GULP!) and my doc did recommend we cancel an expensive golf/tennis week up north at the end of June until later in the summer, bcs I might not be up to it...(it would be 8 weeks out.) We are moving it to August...